The Criterions, Collected (But Not As You’d Think)

radio days

I was walking down the street one day…

So, this happened a few months ago, but I took my time in writing it because well, among other things, I didn’t have any photos for the article and I want to NOT reveal the location of where the shop noted is because they do have some nice pre-owned movies from time to time. Just not these movies as you’ll soon see. ‘Other things’ would be needing to look up photos on the Criterion site and fitting in references and links, something I didn’t want to do initially because I do need to get some of these films and that reminder pokes at my poor wallet each time I look at the site.

Note: I initially chopped down the story significantly because it’s the holidays and you really don’t need to read a lot here because you’ll be putting a bike together, or setting a digital clock on something, and you won’t have time to do more than throw your hands up and throw a badly written instruction manual in the trash, only to retrieve it when you realize the layout was backwards or a page was printed out of order and upside down. I restored the text because when I thought about it, you may as well have a hearty laugh today at my expense because someone will likely roll over your foot with that new bike or attempt to shoot your eye out like Moe Green in The Godfather (or was it in A Christmas Tale?*) if you got them that BB gun they wanted so badly.

Anyway, take a leap below the jump, and prepare for a fall in which we stick the landing, just not the landing we expected.

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The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance Tactics: That’s The Way To Get Me To Play

I don’t have Netflix these days (boo, but streaming is awful and spotty around here), so I haven’t seen the new show at all. But I was around when the original film was released, saw it a few times since and have a fondness for the material, so Enmasse’s and Bonus XP are cooking up a game I really want to play. There’s a neat PlayStation Blog post on the upcoming game to check out, and those screenshots are looking mighty nice. To he honest, I’d rather play this game than some sort of action/platform game or open-world experience, but I wouldn’t be averse to those if they were well made and did proper justice to the source material.

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February 4, 2020 isn’t so far away, that’s for sure. As a big and longtime turn-based tactics fan, I’m looking forward to this one. It’ll also be on other consoles as well as PC, so you’re covered on that front.

 

-GW

Review: Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard (PC)

 

Got five bucks and about an hour to spare? Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard (also available here) will have you letting out a few much needed laughs as you solve the aforementioned case but good. It’s the first game I’ve played from Worm Club (@gracebruxner and @thomasbowker) and it won’t be the last, as I see Grace has an itch.io page and this is a good thing. Anyway, the game is short and simple, charming and droll, two tastes that taste great together, as it were. Oh, and it has LOBSTER COP in it, but don’t tell the Detective this, as he’s the real star. Don’t tell him that either (he’ll figure it out, as he’s a detective).

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Review: Hellboy (2019)

The heroic trio

London’s burning with boredom, now: Well, not yet on the burning part, but plot-wise, that’s all she rote. This is a busy flick that can be hell to watch.

hellboy poster

Somewhere around the 10th level of Hell, it’s good.

So, I finally saw Hellboy a few days ago and waited to write this review to see if I still remembered what happened a few days later as it’s quite a busy flick (there’s a LOT going on, let me tell you).  I did remember (mostly), but I also realized for the second time after a second viewing that it would have been better as a short mini-series on cable spread over a few days that the two-hour film that’s here. I mean, go big or go home, right? This film just goes big all the time, but all that effort manages to feel flat and canned.

The main issue here is despite the copious amounts of swearing, R-rated mostly CGI gore and a few decent performances, the film crams so much in its 120 minutes that it feels like three films worth of material. Between the flashbacks, references to the comic (of which there are plenty) and the fact that it’s quite loud most of the time and has a pretty annoying selection of “headbanging” hard rock tunes (if headbanging means bashing one’s own skull in with a Sisyphus-sized boulder), the end result manages to feel too much like a film made by committee. This one’s a push-button film designed to be some sort of forced “cult classic” and both looks and feels like it. At least some of the practical costume monsters look as if they’re perfect for prime time.

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Review: WRC 8: FIA World Rally Championship (PS4)

WRC 8_01a

Out for a Sunday drive, blinking is very optional.

WRC 8In the options menu of WRC 8, ($59.99) there’s a race card screen that tracks your driving in the game, noting everything you do without any judgement. So far, on my time with the game I’ve ran my cars into stuff 3,302 3,477 times (and counting) between small dings to major collisions that had me completely wrecking out of a few races, but this is a good thing (not for my poor garage, though).

The game is quite a massive effort from KT Racing and it’s their best racer to date as well as the sole officially licensed WRC game on the market. The assorted cars, courses and sounds are pretty lifelike and the rides all handle differently under a range of conditions once you get a grip on the controls. But practicing makes the game even better and finding the perfect settings for each car and course is key to getting the most out of the overall experience.

WRC 8_04

If you’re going too fast, that simple turn up ahead is a bear, but there’s no bear at the end of that turn, fortunately.

Codemasters’ DiRT franchise might be better looking (the terrain deformation adds to the realism) and better known to some, but the outside a PC mod, the more authentic to the WRC season licenses, courses, drivers, and cars here will be the way to go for fans who enjoy the sport and want the deepest dive into it. Thankfully, those options also include a number of tweaks to make the experience a good deal more flexible to new players. Granted, like the two DiRT Rally games, this is the sort of simulation that’s going to be daunting to novices no matter how many assists they turn on. But that sticking to the real deal thing is for me, what makes a good rally game and WRC 8 makes for the most the best WRC experience since the five great WRC titles by the late Evolution Studios way back on the PlayStation 2. That said, one has to give the still mighty Richard Burns Rally it’s own pedestal for what it brought to the virtual rally game.

Even when set to the easiest mode and with every assist on, the game still requires near flawless or even perfect mastering of its courses and weather conditions. New players to this on Easy can indeed make it around the special stage or a few rallies with some effort. but it’s a literal learning curve taking in the pace notes and reading the track ahead while not hitting something because you’re trying to do it while driving a car at high speed with a co-driver notes near-constant directions at you. Still, the game’s Season and Practice modes will be your friend for a while as you settle in. There are the much harder Weekly challenges to do, but you’ll want some mileage under your belt, as these are pretty difficult events.

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Random Film of the Week: Gold Diggers of 1933

(Thanks, Classic Fun!)

gold diggers mpFor too many reasonable to reasonably odd reasons, after all these years, I’d never seen ALL of the Mervyn LeRoy/Busby Berkeley film extravaganza that is Gold Diggers of 1933. I’d seen the fantastic beginning many years back as a kid, but it was late at night and I fell asleep at some point, waking up to some other film playing. Another time, the film was on but I missed about half of it and I hate sitting down to watch half a film, and the back half, as that.

Years later, it was on rotation on TCM by this time, so I figured I’d always catch it at some point. By then, I’d seen 42nd Street, Footlight Parade, and a few other similar musicals, so I thought it would be along the same thematic lines. It is to some extent, very much like the others: a simple plot but elaborately made escapist film for the masses.  With its fantasy of three pretty young ladies in a Depression-era New York City finding love and wealth despite their showgirl roots and assorted shenanigans via a case of mistaken identity that stretches credulity as it should in a film like this, it was gong to be as light and breezy a time as could be, I thought.

gold diggers 01

He’d buy that for a dollar: Aileen MacMahon, a lucky Guy Kibbee and Ginger Rogers, who. despite her charms, doesn’t get the guy here.

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OVERPASS: The Road Less Traveled May Drive You Wild(er)

overpass logo

Things are going to get dirty in this one…

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Coming in February 2020 from Swedish developer Zordix Racing and publisher Bigben Interactive. OVERPASS looks to be the ultimate off-road simulation racer. This isn’t some arcade-like game where you’ll be blasting around in cartoon monster trucks, picking up power-ups and pulling off tricks. Nope, the game looks like a hardcore simulation featuring licensed buggies and quads and more speed, but plenty of obstacles to overcome on each course.

Here’s a trailer to take a look at long with another one below the jump that shows some licensed vehicles you’ll be driving:

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Frog Detective 2: “All The Animals Come Out At Night”, Indeed (3)

frog detective 2

Hop to it, you have a case to solve!

The detective“Wait, there’s a Frog Detective 1?” He thought, as the press release hopped out of his inbox with a loud croak, knocking over a cup full of pencils of assorted size in the process. “Huh, so there is… interesting” he noted, looking at the Steam page, a grin spreading across his face. Those pencils were a bit annoyed, as they had been napping, but oddly enough, now that they were laid out, they dozed right off without a second thought.

“Well, that’s cool because I think I need to play it as well”, he said out loud (but quietly enough to not disturb the pencils). The frog was gone, but he was probably in the living room, as the TV was now on and there was the sound of channels being changed.

Here’s the trailer to the sequel, which just so happens to be called Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard, is now on Steam and itch.io, for $4.99, so go get it. I guess I now need to play it too at some point, right?

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Blacksad: Under the Skin: “All the Animals Come Out At Night”, Indeed (2)

Blacksad logo

Blacksad

Already out on Steam, Microids, Pendulo Studios and YS Interactive’s Blacksad: Under the Skin will release on December 10 on PlayStation 4, Xbox One and Nintendo Switch. Here’s a look at the launch trailer and some screens of this action/adventure game with an all-animal cast set in the 1950’s:

I’d posted about this one previously here, so this is a reminder to me to get to reviewing it soon as a console release. More on the plot and such below the jump.

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Chicken Police: “All The Animals Come Out At Night”, Indeed (1)

CP poster

It’s not Cluck Cargo, that’s for sure.

Okay, I want this because it’s perfect or I want it to be perfect and hey, a film noir-themed classic adventure game with an all animal cast seems to be a big thing again (as you’ll see in a few posts today). Here are the trailer and some nice screenshots for indie developer The Wild Gentlemen’s upcoming Chicken Police: Paint It Red, set to be published by Handy Games sometime is 2020 on PC, PS4. Xbox One and Switch. I want this in a physical edition at some point just to whip out and show people I wasn’t hallucinating if the game ever vanishes from digital stores.

Here’s the wonderfully amusing and quite eye-popping trailer, Game info and screenshots are below the jump. Tell me you’re not wanting to see more, even (or especially) if you’re not a gamer because you’re into noir and now suddenly wanting to see how this film noir-inspired adventure turns out (Yeah, I know male chickens are called roosters, but I’ll give it a pass this time):

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