PC Review: MOVE OR DIE

MOD_Thumb3Platform: PC (also on Mac/Linux)

Developer: Those Awesome Guys

Publisher: Those Awesome Guys

# of Players: 1 – 4

MSRP: $ 14.99

ESRB Rating: N/A

Official Site

Score: A- (90%)

Can’t type… playing…

Okay, I had to drag my tired self away from my ongoing battle with MOVE OR DIE just to drag myself back to the computer and bang out a quick review. This game is a total blast and pretty much everything it’s cracked up to be in one package. Simple enough for the kids to pick up, but only the best and most clever and cheap players will survive… that is until they get bested by someone or some random element that’s smarter or faster. The name of the game says it all. If you don’t MOVE, your little avatar will DIE, period. If that wasn’t impetus enough, you’re tasked with a number of randomly rotating mini-games, all of which last a mere twenty seconds each and consist of trying to stay alive longer than the other players whether AI or live.

Between the chainsaws, falling block walls, time bombs and other hazards, this is a game where everyone dies at some point and the key to survival is dying less than anyone else you’re playing against. This simplicity plus the intense speed of each round keeps the game fresh even if the currently limited number of game modes randomly loops back on itself multiple times. The greatest thing about the game is it allows anyone who can hold a controller and keep moving to play and win (and lose).

1

This one’s a game where the cute factor of those avatars only vaguely mask the title’s dedication to keeping players in a constant state of tension and/or hilarity. You can win a match with a split second remaining and lose the next one in the same manner. That “friendship destroying” element the trailer promises isn’t really a good selling point because the players you’ve beaten are going to not want to quit playing until they get some payback.

Chainsaw backstab chase clean up crew fizzle floor Ghost scare pass the bomb Rocket Run Stomp Vertigo

 

That said, you may end up kicking your friends and family you play with out of their own homes, thus destroying a few friendships in the process. So there’s that to consider. Anyway, the gameplay is fast and furious, you’ll always be on your toes and you’ll die in the most amusing or annoying ways as you play. It’s hard to MOVE when the floor disappears underneath you and jumping or falling makes your life bar drain quicker as it’s not considered a movement option here. DIE. You’ll be playing a bomb tag game, hand off the bomb to some unlucky player, teleport out of the way only to get that bomb back from another player who just got it as you warped to where he or she was running. DIE. You’ll be chainsaw back-stabbed (DIE!), run into spikes numerous times (DIE! DIE!), and pretty much DIE in so many other ways that you’ll have nightmares (comical ones, mind you) about all sorts of hazards doing your cute little character in.

Simple visuals, a great soundtrack and that tutorial section that gets you playing and dying right way as a means of judging your level of patience for this sort of thing all work in the game’s favor. Online play works fine, but can be a bit empty if you log on at the wrong times. Thankfully, solo to 4-player local multiplayer is always active if you have friends or family willing to poke elbows a each other on the couch. The game also allows for modding (I haven’t tried any yet) and should also REALLY land on consoles because it’s awesome enough to be an instant hit on anything it ends up on. Okay – basta es basta. I need to get back to this game because I have people waiting to get their revenge and I’m stalling because I want to keep my streak going. That won’t last, though – I hear I’m about to be ganged up on so I can DIE a few times and maybe tap out for the day.

Yeah, right. Like that’s going to happen.

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