Review: MegaTagmension Blanc + Neptune VS Zombies

Posted on May 29, 2016 by geelw

Platform: PlayStation Vita/PSTV

Developer(s): Idea Factory/Compile Heart/Tamsoft

Publisher: Idea Factory International*

# of Players: 1 – 4

MSRP: $39.99 (retail/PSN)

ESRB Rating: T (Teen)

Sneaky, Tamsoft, SNEAKY. Teaming up with Idea Factory and Compile Heart and getting your Onechanbara in my Neptunia while making it a ridiculously fun and ridiculously cute hack & slash with a ridiculous amount of replay value. Ridiculous! MegaTagmension Blanc + Neptune VS Zombies is an absolutely silly blast of a game that’s easy to get into and deserves a sequel of some sort down the road. Yeah, I missed out on Hyperdimension Neptunia U: Action Unleashed (it’s on my list of stuff to get to, really!), so I’m going into this one as it’s an all-new and different experience.

While it’s packed with characters and content, the “Hey, let’s put on a show!” hijinks that revolve around the female students of Gamicademi trying to save their school from closing by making a low-budget zombie movie also makes for a pretty amusing plot. The game is part visual novel, part action/RPG and definitely going to take up a small to moderate chunk of your time thanks to all the variables that come into play. That tongue-in-cheek humor it bashes you over the head with gets you into the groove right from the start, but it’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. Your Vita will either pop out of its hiding place and kiss you for making this purchase or slap you in the face with a smirk if you get too serious while playing this game. Or both. Continue reading →

HUMOR: Dr. “No” To ‘Jane Bond’, Yes to 007

Posted on May 26, 2016 by geelw

Not that I’m against a female MI6 agent at all, ladies and germs, but simply sex-changing James Bond isn’t the way to do it right at all. As much as some might want it to be, this isn’t a Mass Effect game or some over-smoked pot-boiled fan fiction with a much bigger budget. I took that fan-made concept poster and distilled it a bit so the “Aha!” people get where this is going. For the rest of you, here’s the idea that popped into my skull as soon as I saw that image:

Let’s say after a few agents gone rogue/missing/KIA, Her Majesty’s Secret Service institutes an order for all current and future agents to have special tamper-proof chips installed on their persons (under the skin somewhere) so every movement they make can be tracked for “their safety and efficiency” by the bureau. Of course, a certain mister Bond doesn’t want to be mod-chipped at all, and as he’s out in the field, can’t pop back to swingin’ Londinium to get that tracker installed.

Let’s just say MI6 has ways of getting their directives passed… Continue reading →

READS: Star Wars Works Spectacularly As A Scrolling Infographic

Posted on May 25, 2016 by geelw

Many movie fans all know what follows this memorable opening image, but thanks to Zurich-based artist Martin Panchaud, we now have quite possibly the best illustrated retelling of Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope to date. While not flawless (there are a few incorrectly translated lines), the scrolling infographic absolutely nails the storytelling beats, but from a top down perspective and using colored dots for human and alien characters. If you’re a big enough fan of the film, I’d bet you’ll be hearing that phenomenal John Williams score in your head at all the right moments. Go check it out (if this hasn’t been forwarded to your own inbox already today).

Also, someone call Guinness (no, not the ghost of Alec, silly!)- I think at 123 meters (or 403.543307 feet), it just may be the longest infographic you’ll see for a while. Anyway, go revisit a classic film from 1977 in a whole new way.

Lumo: Brilliant Iso Platformer’s One of The Year’s Best Surprises

Posted on May 25, 2016 by geelw

Lumo is out now on Steam, gog.com, the Humble Store (PC/Mac/Linux), and PlayStation 4 now and that $20 price tag may actually be too little for such a gorgeous and brain-twisting platform/adventure game hybrid. Created by Triple Eh! (Gareth Noyce) and published by Rising Star Games, there’s so much packed into this isometric wonder that most gamers under a certain age with no sense of game history outside their own short memories will spin themselves silly trying to keep up with the seemingly endless references to games they’ve never seen or played. North American gamers with some experience will note the Solstice and Equinox homages along with nods to Donkey Kong, Marble Madness, and a few other classic arcade and console games while they jump through around and in many cases, OVER levels to locate some very-well hidden secrets.

This isn’t a proper “review” (yet) as I’m basing my wordy noise here on the preview code I received and finally got around to this past weekend. Think of this as a fine and dandy heads-up if you’re on the hunt for a lengthy, challenging blend of old and new schools that’s cute enough to be a kid’s game, but tricky enough to get the most seasoned player checking out every nook and cranny for hidden stuff. As you play, you’ll discover Noyce is indeed a very, very talented guy with an elephantine memory and deep knowledge about his favorite games and a willingness to share that with anyone who picks up a controller. 400 rooms in a beautifully rendered Easter Egg farm where fast movement is necessary, yet paying attention to visual cues makes for truly rewarding play sessions. The sense of discovery in Lumo is fairly remarkable because you’ll be doing things both inside and outside the box. See some crates stacked by a wall or what looks like a curious means of reaching the top of a wall? With a bit of effort poking around in nearby room or a bit of backtracking to other curious spots, you’ll be up and over those walls and into new territory. Continue reading →

Odin Sphere Leifthrasir PS4 Demo Out Now: A Dish of VanillaWare For Dessert Sounds Grand

Posted on May 24, 2016 by geelw

If you own a PlayStation 4, you can do yourself a HUGE favor today and download the demo for Odin Sphere Leifthrasir NOW on PSN. The game isn’t arriving until June 7, but you’ll see that this revived and remastered PS2 game looks absolutely gorgeous and runs at a wonderful 60fps. There’s also a VERY nice surprise for those who remember the original release, but I shall let you see for yourself what that is. I’d say more, but the embargo isn’t over until tomorrow and I don’t want to get smited by my favorite PR guy. This pairing of Atlus and Sega is a match made in gaming heaven.

Tomb Raider Turns 20: Two From The Vaults Make Lara More Appreciated

Posted on May 24, 2016 by geelw

Wow. Every game has unused content from early concept art to trailers and other elements that never see the light of day unless properly preserved. Today’s unearthing of two pieces of Lara Croft memorabilia (digital department), come from Crystal Dynamics and Square Enix in time for the Tomb Raider franchise’s 20th anniversary. It’s hard to believe that much time has passed since Lara swung onto the gaming scene and became a worldwide smash, digital sex symbol (for better or worse), and even a role model of sorts to super-fans inspired by the character.

She’s survived some great and not-so-great games in the series, many, many deaths the introduction of the now forgotten by fans who know how to move on Kurtis Trent, two movies that weren’t so hot, but got butts into theater seats, and a two-time revival back into her former glory thanks to newer console tech and current developers Crystal Dynamics. Lara may have had some ups and downs over the years, but to those of us who dip a toe into the pool and replay her games from old to new, she’ll always be our golden girl.

The Exorcist, A TV Series? The Power of “Cripes” Compels You

Posted on May 23, 2016 by geelw

So join me for a drink boys
We’re gonna make a big noise

So don’t worry about tomorrow
Take it today
Forget about the check
We’ll get hell to pay

According to a few sources including the director himself, William Friedkin fired blanks off-camera into the air in order to get an actor to react with fright during a key moment in The Exorcist. I’m betting the 1936 penny sitting mysteriously atop my too-small entertainment center (seriously, it just appeared one day and I have NO clue as to how it got there!) that Friedkin maybe shot a computing device of some sort when he found out Fox as making a series based (kind of?) on the classic horror film that freaked out millions back in 1973 and is still influential to this very day.

(Thanks, Movieclips!)

Me? I had NO idea this was a thing until the always on point Written in Blood pointed out that trailer above. The power of crap compelled my jaw to drop because WHY? There’s really no use or need for a modern take on The Exorcist because the film did what it did so well and is still an effective horror film to this day. Like the upcoming Lethal Weapon TV series (yeah, WHY?), this trend to dig up otherwise fine and dandy entertainment and drag it kicking and screaming into this decade’s short attention span theater audience that will drop a new show they don’t like like a hot rock after one or two episodes. My reaction to that trailer above was somewhat NSFW, and went something like this:

(Thanks again, Movieclips!)

Don’t believe me? Well, how’s that Rush Hour TV series doing, ladies and gents? Uh-huh. Sure, there are a bunch of devil shows on the air already and Fox does have a “hit” with Lucifer, which I’ve yet to see because I’m not at all interested in it. But I just can’t see The Exorcist being a series with legs once the story the film tells (now rewritten for TV) plays itself out. Well, unless it turns into some sort of possession anthology series with a demon of the week (ugh), which would kill off the scare factor faster than a vampire eating a loaf of garlic bread as the sun rose.

Meh, maybe I’m too cranky and wrong on this… but I don’t think so. If this show ends up being a surprise hit like Bates Motel and goes on for a few seasons, I’ll look into making my own deal with the devil. Oh, don’t worry about me, folks… I know how to trick Old Scratch into letting me keep my soul:

(Thanks, lilacwine85!)

It’s a good thing I can bake a little is all I’m saying…

What’s Cookin’: Greens, Eggs, and Ham? Make Them Yourself, Man!

Posted on May 21, 2016 by geelw

Hmm. Memo to the loud guy I passed on the way home yelling about the (and I quote) “bitch who won’t make me eggs after noon”: Ugh. Learn to cook, you ignorant jerk and make your own damn eggs ANY TIME YOU WANT. Keep it up with that overly cranky attitude and those aren’t the only eggs you’ll never have anything to do with ever again.

That, and it’s no joke to get hit upside the head with a cast iron fry pan while one is snoozing. Anyway, let me be nice and give you a recipe you can learn and perfect, provided you’re not un-jamming a pan from your gaping maw: Continue reading →

Gallery: DARQ

Posted on May 20, 2016 by geelw

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

With indie and AAA horror games being a dime a dozen these days, it’s going to take something really different to get some gamers jumping out of their seats and diving under their beds. Unfold Games has taken up the scare you halfway to death challenge with DARQ, their upcoming PC/Mac/Linux game that as you can see, certainly seems to have it going on in terms of delivering the frights.

So, what’s this stylistic and creepy psychological horror game about, you ask? Well, here’s what the official site says:

DARQ tells the story of Lloyd, a boy who becomes aware of the fact that he is dreaming. To Lloyd’s misfortune, the dream quickly turns into a nightmare and all attempts to wake up end in failure. While exploring the darkest corners of his subconscious, Lloyd learns how to survive the nightmare by bending the laws of physics and manipulating the fluid fabric of the dream world.

In DARQ, sound plays a very important role. There are sections of the game that take place in absolute darkness and in order to navigate the environment, Lloyd has to rely on the location of sounds.

Yep. If you’ve ever had those nightmares where you know you’re sleeping, but wake up all sweaty looking around the room only to have something bizarre take place as you realize you’re having a nightmare inside that nightmare, DARQ will be right up that dark alley you don’t want to travel through. Of course, you’ll be going thataway because that thing chasing you is keeping you from going backward. Oops.

Some imagery to keep you awake nights. As if that trailer didn’t get all crawly under your skin enough:

While the game is still in development and doesn’t yet have a set release date other than TBA 2016, it sure is worth keeping an eyeballed peeled for. Let that image stick with you for the day (eww!). I’d say “have a good night”, but it’s early on a Friday morning. Still, you have to go home and sleep at some point, correct? My work here is done, then.

Now, There’s a Film I’d LOVE to See…

Posted on May 18, 2016 by geelw

Photo Credit: Annie Leibovitz

Yep. You’d pay good money to see Helen Mirren and Judi Dench in a period piece with those outfits, too. They could be a 40’s er Holmes and Watson, an older Thelma and Louise (having not stomped on the gas in that flick), two ladies out shopping or anything else a writer’s room could bust out in a few weeks that still manages to read like drunken fan fiction. My ticket would be bought and so would yours. Don’t lie, either. Hell, you’d be pushing me out of the line just to get in first, grrrr. Anyway, my brain is still fuzzy after today’s… er, YESTERDAY’S busyness. Go write up your own plot for that photo above. See you later today at some point.