The Only April Fool’s Day Joke That Made Me Laugh Today


 

Thank you, CD Projekt RED for *magically* getting water to shoot out my nose earlier today. It’s a definite April Fool’s gag, but I’d more than gladly pay that five bucks for talking horse DLC just for the chance to have an option to have Roach talk in a Mr. Ed voice. Okay, back to work here – I’m up to my wet nostril hairs in stuff to do.

RymdResa on Sale: Half-Off (So You Can Go Get Spaced Out Cheaper)

RymdResa Sale
 

Relaxing yet somehow terrifying, Morgondag‘s RymdResa is one of those great game experiences open to all who give it a shot. The atmospheric space exploration game where no combat is s key feature is also one of the more compelling games you’ll ever play and at $5.99 for the next week, an even better bargain. If you stopped reading this here and went to check the game out, my work here is done. Everyone else, keep reading.


 

Gameplay is both zen-like and creep upon you intense as monitoring dwindling resources and shields while trying to survive everything from asteroid collisions to ominously massive space creatures of assorted origin trying to stop your travels cold makes for a great means of killing a few hours at a time. The game is also great for shorter play sessions as well, given that one can level up relatively quickly (within a few minutes), save, quit and pick up later on with no trouble.

Also, Morgondag is working on a new game called Imprint-X, a cosmic-themes puzzler where players need to solve what’s on screen in as few moves as possible. It looks pretty neat and yes you should go sign up on the game’s page when you can.

ADR1FT Floats Onto Steam – VR, Consoles to Follow

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“Here am I floating round my tin can. Far above the Moon. Planet Earth is blue. And there’s nothing I can do…”

 

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While PlayStation 4, Xbox One, and VR-enabled PC and PS4 versions of threeonezero’s ADR1FT are still in the works, PC gamers with Steam accounts and rigs with decent specs can now purchase the game for $19.99. Even without the added virtual reality functionality 505 Games has a hit here that should go along way in convincing even the most ardent skeptic about the viability of VR for certain gaming and entertainment purposes.

Of course, getting past the new breed of hard-core internet skeptics who dub these sort of first-person experiences “walking simulators” (Bleh. There’s no “walking” here, as you play an astronaut stranded on a partially destroyed space station who needs to figure out what happened) will be the game’s biggest hurdle with the second issue for some being the estimated 4-6 hours it takes to complete the game. Length really isn’t something to whine about here as the game has enough elements to make it replayable as well as a conversation piece to show off for the outstanding Unreal 4-powered visuals.

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And if you really want to show off something even more physical, you can boogie on over to iam8bit.com to check out their cool online shop and snag one of those cool ADR1FT Collector’s Edition boxes for $54.95. That price nets you two digital codes for the game (PC and Oculus Rift VR versions), one of two different 756 piece jigsaw puzzles, a nice embroidered HAN-1V patch and a pack of “tasty” astronaut ice cream, all in a big box for safekeeping (but probably not guaranteed to survive being sent into actual space).

Nintendo 3DS Review: Sadame

Sadame Poster

SADAME boxPlatform: Nintendo 3DS

Developer: Mebius

Publisher: Rising Star Games

# of Players: 1

MSRP: $14.99

ESRB Rating: T (Teen)

Official Site

Score: B 80%

Logo1It’s somewhat surprising that with so many RPGs available on the Nintendo 3DS, the old-school dirt simple hack & slash sub-genre is somewhat underrepresented. Granted, you’re probably not going to get a fancy looking Diablo or Torchlight-style game up and running on the 3DS hardware without some miracle coding skill and Nintendo completely missed the boat on localizing the fantastic DS game Soma Bringer to the west some years back. Thankfully, Rising Star Games has taken up the chase ‘n chop mantle with Ishi-Sengoku-Den “Sadame” (heretofore shortened to Sadame for the remainder of this review).

The game takes the basic formula found in Blizzard’s classic franchise and adds a feudal Japanese setting, simplified gameplay and multiple routes through four acts that feature multiple routes which add replay value if you want to explore every inch of the maps. While the results aren’t flawless, gamers with more open minds and a willingness to deal with a few quirks will get a lot more out of what’s here than those who come in with a load of expectations.
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Trillion: God of Destruction Trailer: You’ve That Many Reasons to Grab This Vita Game


 

Trillion banner ifiIdea Factory and veteran developer Compile Heart have a nifty new game for Vita owning JRPG/SRPG fans looking for something hellishly cool and fun to play. Trillion 1,000,000,000,000: God of Destruction, coming to the PlayStation Vita on March 29 for a MSRP of $39.99.

The game is a cornucopia of doom and cuteness that features a single titanic enemy with that titular trillion hit points that needs to be stopped before it stomps all over the six layers of the Underworld after its ruler is severely incapacitated. Players can expect a hybrid of the classic Princess Maker with a shake of Disgaea-like humor and a initially daunting battle system where you pit sassy female Overlords against Trillion after training them in assorted skills pre-battle. There’s a lot more, but this isn’t a review as you’ll see when you read the next sentence under that screenshot below.

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Guess what? Yours truly is currently in the process of reviewing the game, so I’ll have to keep you all in suspense for a wee bit other than to note quite an entertaining time is being had here. Back with more on Trillon shortly.

Daydreamer: Awakened Edition – Atlus Gets The Truly Trippy Platformer to PS4, Xbox One


 

Thanks to so darn many indie games dropping from the sky these days (it’s a digital monsoon at times!), I’d never even heard of the one man show called Roland Studios or its wild PC game Daydreamer until I got word that Atlus was handling the PS4 (May 31, 2016) and Xbox One (June 3, 2016) publishing in North America. Updated with enhanced features and now called Daydreamer: Awakened Edition, all you need to do is ogle that mind-bending weirdness above and you know you’re in for a trip and a half.

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If you like reading a bit more and that laser-eyed bunny above hasn’t freaked you out too much, here’s what to expect in the updated console version:

Daydreamer: Awakened Edition features:

• Twitchy Retro Gameplay – Those who live for intense side-scrolling, platforming, and shooting action will feel right at home, because players will shoot, whip, shield, jump, and warp their way to the Earth’s core. The design choices in the game harken back to gaming’s arcade classics!

• A Varied Combat System – With a dearth of different weapons and abilities at the daydreamer’s disposal, she will eradicate aliens with energy, homing, ray, helix, and flamethrower blasters, and melee mutants with her whips. She also has the abilities to shield against damage, warp to hard-to-reach areas, slow down time, and more. But they don’t come cheap—players must hunt for Psymatter in order to buy the weapons and items that will aid her along her hazardous journey.

• Powerful Pets – Psymatter also can be used to purchase/sustain a loyal pet companion to stay by your side to the death (or until you run out of Psymatter). From fuzzy turtles to vicious weasels, pets will offer invaluable support in varied forms to the daydreamer.

• Frightening Bosses – If normal aliens, mutants, robots, and bugs aren’t bad enough, the bosses of Daydreamer: Awakened Edition are truly terrifying to behold. The disturbing Mr. Smiles, the repulsive Grimeboy, and ferocious, but still kind of cute, Rabies Rabbit are just some of the creepy boss monsters brought to life in the game.

• Numerous Improvements – Since this is the Awakened Edition, that means there are a multitude of improvements and additions to the original release. Besides gameplay tweaks and balancing, there are now more difficulties, enhanced controls, improved combat, a ranked mode/leaderboard for the competitive, world map function, a brand new ending, and much more.

 

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That sounds like a plan to me, folks. The strangeness will commence on those two newer platforms on the dates noted above. Hopefully the PC version will get the same updates as I know some gamers who only do their thing on PC will want what everyone else is having.

Road to Ballhalla Hands-On: More-Ball Madness

If you make it this far without losing a ball, you sir (or madam) are officially some sort of deity to be bowed down to.

If you make it this far without losing a ball, you sir (or madam) are officially some sort of deity to be bowed down to.

 

tinyBuild Games decided to unleash a little surprise last week and allow some 3000 random Steam account holders to play a six stage Alpha version of Torched Hill‘s upcoming Road to Ballhalla, a game that’s a tiny bit hard to categorize. While it has a few similarities to Marble Madness and the 1998 PlayStation game Kula World (or Roll Away here in the states), Road to Ballhalla is more of a wall-less maze game where reaching the end of each level requires players changing their gameplay focus on a dime often within the same level. I guess you could all it a “puzzle” game if you like based on the simple visual style and rather cool music in that trailer below.


In case you didn’t watch the trailer and that previous sentence connotes “casual” to some of you core gamers who’d normally ignore something like this, you’re in for a big surprise. You can consider Road to Ballhalla the Dark Souls of indie puzzle games (or something *sexy* like that).
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Huge PSN Flash Sale: Your Wallet Gets “Magically” Lighter Thanks To TOO Many Deals

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Ay Carumba! If you have a PSN account, a PS3, PS4, Vita and/or PSP and some money to burn or you just like some excellent deals on a handful of titles, get ready for so many deals that you’d think you were dreaming. This newest PSN Flash Sale has games for all the aforementioned consoles plus movies if you have the time to watch those once you blow your paycheck on a ton of discount game downloads. Anyway, check out the list on the PSN site or go ogle the post on the PlayStation Blog if you just want to read that long list and see what you’re missing out on.

GRIM DAWN Now on gog.com: Sunlight? What’s Sunlight?


 

While Crate Entertainment’s completed release version of its ARPG GRIM DAWN has been officially out on Steam since February 25, it’s just arrived on gog.com at a slight discount off the already low $24.99 price. The game has been in development for a while and while I’ve been tracking its progress from the shadows, I didn’t participate in the pre-release playable versions because I wanted to wait until the game was actually done and ready to buy. Some of the handful of folks on the dev team also worked on the great Titan Quest, so it was a no-brainer that GD would be flat out superb. Well, the problem now is if I buy it NOW, when the heck will I find time to PLAY it? My backlog is pretty massive as it is and I still need to pick up Dragon’s Dogma: Dark Arisen for PC because I want to see how well it runs at 60fps and it was absolutely one of my favorite games of the previous console cycle.

Hmmm. Time for a coin toss, it seems. If it lands as it should, I may never see the light of day again. Well, for a few months at least.

PC Review: The Count Lucanor

lucanor_poster_01Platform: PC (via Steam)

Developer/Publisher: Baroque Decay Games

# of Players: 1

MSRP: $9.99

ESRB Rating: N/A (but it’s NOT for the kiddies!)

Official Site

Score: A- (90%)
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When a game’s press info mentions classics The Legend of Zelda and Silent Hill as inspirations, it’s either going to be really great or really lousy. Fortunately, Baroque Decay’s excellent The Count Lucanor is not only really great, it’s one of those smartly designed “retro” games that does pretty much everything right. The game is funny, a bit frightening (and best played in the darkness) and definitely disturbing on a few fronts. While it’s not a lengthy experience at all, the about 5 hours it takes to play (which is your average 8 or 16-bit game length, not counting RPG or strategy titles) means it won’t wear out its welcome when all is said and done. Five different endings mean there’s replay value to be had if you want to see every possible outcome, but you can mildly abuse the save system if you don’t want to start from the beginning each time. Continue reading