Just Feel: A Little Indie Action on Hump Day

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enjminlogoLet’s talk about s-e-x for a hot minute. Most popular videogames act like it doesn’t exist or it’s made essential to a story as a “relationship” deal where it’s mishandled like a giraffe trying to juggle watermelons while playing the bongos. Boo to most of the AAA game industry and it’s primarily clumsy pawing of a subject that should be gently approached and touched in just the right places.

Meanwhile, over in France (where the heck else?), seven first-year students at Le Cnam-Enjmin took three months to make Just Feel, a very short, FREE, and let’s just say “educational” game about…

Well, let’s just see what the game page says:

The goal of this project is to mention sensuality and the pleasure in a poetic and subtle way.

The idea is to show a form of sensual relation without taboo and vulgarity.

In this experience the player personifies a caress metaphor.

This project is focus on the flow feeling.

Relaxation and surprise.

This is a 10 minutes experience.

 

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While this one’s a bit too easy to describe how to play and the overall goal, you still kind of need to play it and see…er, feel for yourself what the deal is. In fact, BEFORE you play, watch the let’s play video for a bit of hilarity as the guy playing can’t quite figure out where he’s at on the figure. Some girls and guys will get a chuckle and “It figures…” head shake while watching. Hey, some of us need a lot of practice. Yeah, me included.

Anyway, you may blush a little before the game times out, but it’s tastefully done (quiet back there!) and abstract enough to indeed be called art. So, um. Go give it a try, I say.

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I guess I should score this, right? Okay, 1 point a minute makes this a perfect 10.

-GW

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Blu-Ray Reviews: A Handful of Arrows for the Holidays

Ho, and Ho-Ho. It’s been quite a year here, but that’s not why I’m here babbling on my keyboard. You need some more movies to watch, I’m sitting on a stack of them that needed to get written up and this post is my way of attempting to get you to spend some of that disposable income you’re trying to hoard in that mattress. Anyway, I see your quiver is half empty there, Robin Hood. Here are six Arrow Video Blu-Rays of note to nab either direct from MVD Entertainment or your favorite video selling emporium. Lock up the kids for most of these because it’s the birds and the bees plus some bloody good and badness going on below.

Requiescant_AV022Requiescant (MSRP: $39.95): Carlo Lizzani’s 1967 spaghetti western (also known as Kill & Pray) gets a ton of mileage from its religiously-raised orphan turned dead-shot gunfighter (Lou Castel), but it’s also working a political agenda that’s somewhat fitting in this current climate of careless Trumpeting. Kicking off with a massacre of border-bound Mexicans (one of whom survives to become Castel’s priest/gunman), the movie switches gears to a rescue mission that doesn’t go exactly as planned before it drops back into weightier territory.

While mostly bloodless and only slightly comical, the film lets Castel carry the picture despite the presence of director Pier Paolo Pasolini in what’s an extended cameo as a revolutionary leader of sorts. He’s got a memorably manly visage, but Castel’s more innocent good looks and his ways with a firearm are going to keep your eyes on him throughout the film. You can choose from Italian or English versions of the film (both impeccable 2K restorations) with two interviews and a trailer rounding out the special features. Like Arrows other westerns released in the US in the past, this one’s a cult classic that comes highly recommended. Continue reading

Onechanbara Z2 Chaos Now On Sale: Let’s Get Physical (But Digital Is Okay, Too)


 

Onechanbara Z2 Chaos screenLet’s get this out of the way. You’re NOT buying Onechanbara Z2 Chaos because it’s anything close to AAA quality “Game of the Year” material. Nope, you’re buying because you’re a guy or gal who really like SUPER offbeat action games from Japan featuring under-dressed but overpowered ladies slicing and dicing hordes of undead creatures and creeps. That and the game is also pretty darn hilarious because it’s so intentionally over the top while being extremely accessible to about anyone who picks up a controller and wants to take it for a spin. XSEED Games has two versions of the game out today; a digital download for $39.99 that includes the game and rather sassy “Strawberries and Banana” DLC “costumes”.

Onechanbara Z2 Chaos BS LE
 

Hey, both fruit are quite tasty and VERY good for you! Lots of vitamins and minerals and other good stuff like that there. So that LE has some nutritional and educational value. Get two!

If you want something to touch and show off (fear not, Aya, Saki and the other gals won’t chop your sweaty hands off), run like the wind to your nearest game emporium with $49.99 and get the yummy limited “Banana Split” edition shown above. That set nets you a soundtrack CD packed with almost 80 minutes of music from both this game and its Japan-only predecessor Onechanbara Z: Kagura, an 80-page softcover “Behind the Bikini” book loaded with artwork and back story from both games, and a code to download that aforementioned “Strawberries & Banana” premium DLC costume. Let’s see now: so far, Onechanbara Z2 Chaos is (according to me) nutritious, educational, “sassy”, and a few other things. That sounds like a buy to me. And probably XSEED Games as well.

Random Film of the Week: Future Women

The Girl From Rio 1969 MPHey, I love looking at naked ladies in bad movies as much as the next guy or gal who loves looking at naked ladies in bad movies, but a film like the incomprehensible mess that is Future Women (or The Girl From Rio, Rio ’70, City Without Men, The Seven Secrets of Sumuru, Sumuru: Queen of Femina, and of all things, Mothers of America) makes me want to shift that hobby to watching paint dry or grass grow instead.

Directed by cult schlockmesiter supremo Jesús “Jess” Franco and seemingly edited by a team of eyeless chimps who probably dropped the film into a blender (and who also did some of the wretchedly amusing “special” effects), this is one of those lame Bond copycats that gets nothing right because its source material never should have been altered into the 007 wannabe nonsense-fest that will have your brain running out of the room about halfway in. But yeah, it’s got a bunch of naked and half-naked ladies and is kinda sorta of based on a story by Sax Rohmer , so there’s that. Continue reading

Onechanbara Z2: Chaos – Xseed Games Brings Back The Bikini Zombie Slayers!

 

Oneechanbara Z2 Chaos PS4As soon as the box art appeared for the Japanese version of Oneechanbara Z2 Chaos, I stuck a .png file in a folder on my desktop to remind me to keep an eyeball peeled in case the game got a North American localization. I didn’t think it would actually happen, mind you. The last two games that made it over from this series didn’t do well critically, so it seemed those entries would be the last we;d see here.

Well, I was wrong, as Xseed Games is getting Tamsoft’s latest game out on the PS4 out in English this year (minus an “e” in the title). I’d gather this one will be a digital-only release, as it’s certainly more of a niche title. We’ll see soon enough, I suppose. Anyway, color me thrilled about this intentionally cheesy charmer that’s not at all for the kiddies.

Random Film of the Week(end): Malibu High

Malibu High MP 1979In the storied pantheon of “High school girl goes bad, turns to prostitution and murder to make ends meet, meets end tragically” films, Irvin Berwick’s 1979 exploitation classic Malibu High is probably the “best” of the bunch. Well, I’m not sure “best” is the proper word to use for a film this bizarre, but you genre fans know what I mean.

That cute poster on the left makes it look like a typical pre-80’s sex comedy flick packed with lowbrow laughs. But man, is it oh soooooooo misleading. Yes, there are laughs to be had here and plenty of them. But the film’s general tone straddles the line between parody and interesting attempts to be serious with breathtaking results… Continue reading

Bayonetta 2: A Few Firsts for Nintendo to Celebrate…


 
I got a nice and hearty laugh yesterday thanks to the following email header: “A sexy, all-new action game available now” and that’s because it was an email from Nintendo. I don’t think any of their in-house advertising has previously used the word “sexy” (feel free to correct me here), so that’s what made me laugh so much. From now on, I want Nintendo to find any way to squeeze the word into EVERY game they produce. Let’s see Bayonetta outfits in that next Metroid game (whenever it gets made), the character herself pop up in the new Smash Bros. game, an Amiibo figurine just because she needs one and what the double heck, why not get Princess Peach out of that pink getup and Zelda out of her usual fantasy schmatta and into something more… sassy! er, SEXY!

Oh, the possibilities are endless, folks… Continue reading

Bayonetta 2 Direct: Yeah, It’s A BUY, Nintendo, It’s a BUY!


 

BOOOM. Can’t talk. Watching. back in a bit. My Wii U is at home bouncing around the room. Go, PlatinumGames! This Nintendo exclusive has been making competing console owners green with envy and red with raaaaaaage for over a year, so here’s more fuel for those fires. The game looks INCREDIBLE and yeah, yeah, super casual touch screen mode aside, should be a MORe than worthy sequel to the original game. Now, will it sell Wii U consoles? That’s VERY hard to say at this point. However, given Nintendo’s coming games from now until 2015, I’d say we’ll see a lot more units moving during and past this holiday season.

Sorry, 20th Century Fox. Your Throwback Tease Was Too Rich For My Blood…

beyond_the_valley_of_the_dolls_xlgSo, I get an email on Thursday from 20th Century Fox’s YouTube channel about Beyond the Valley of the Dolls and it gets me grinning because I’d been thinking of picking this up at some point and thought this was news of a lower-priced reissue. HA! I clicked that link under the trailer and got sent straight to Amazon, where the movie’s 2-disc DVD set is still commanding a whopping $70 (eek!). Um, thanks, but no thanks, folks.

Hell, at that exorbitant price point, I’ll just lurk around TCM and wait for them to show it again one late, late evening (or too early in the morning, actually). Of course, getting any Russ Mayer flick for under the cost of a body part is tricky these days if you live in the US and want a legal version. But man, owning them all must sure be a heck of a thing if you display your collection proudly and have to explain the man’s work to friends and relatives who’ve never seen anything he’s done. Good luck with that!

Random Film of the Week(end): Not With My Wife, You Don’t!

(thanks, Night of the Trailers!)

Not With My Wife You Don't MPYikes. Depending on your tastes, Norman’s Panama’s 1966 Sex comedy Not With My Wife, You Don’t! is going to be a very funny film or one you can’t stand. That’s because this sort of humor is SO dated that some will consider the film extremely sexist to a fault (it is) while others who can slip into the mood of the era comfortably will find it a rollicking good time with a nice all-star cast, some lovely Technicolor photography and a fun Saul Bass title sequence that’s one of his quirkiest (see below).

Me, I kind of straddled the fence before falling into the latter yard. While it has its moments and yes, some wonderful shots of Air Force jets in action that make it a must see, the film hasn’t aged well at all as it flops and flails about in too many attempts to be a slapstick comedy while tossing around its questionable content with the hope it always lands on its feet…

(thanks Movie Titles!)

Continue reading