Game of Thrones Season 3: Carmelo May Be A Fan, But I Probably Don’t Need to Know This…

 

Eeek. Um, OK? I guess (and HOPE) Carmelo Anthony is a big fan of the show and all, but I really don’t like these oddball crossover promotion advertising whatever deals because it almost seems as if someone thought it was a good idea to over-check the demographics of who watches the show, figure out who may NOT yet be a fan and make an annoying ad that appeals to that market (and may not be so annoying to that demographic or whatever). Or something like that. Yeah, it’s as clumsy as this post is (or clumsier, as I don’t cringe at my writing – I leave that to you, dear reader), but I guess that’s how it goes. It’s not TV, It’s HBO, you know… Bleh. Oh well, as long as there’s no attempts at putting any sportsball players IN the show as a marketing mistake, this video can be forgiven…

Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut Random Screenshot of the Day: Road Rules (1)!

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Today’s screenshot is an all George Woodman affair, but his ticked off stare and words of wisdom in that caption will come in quite handy in the future. Particularly if you happen to be carrying that new plastic badge in your pocket you picked up for the cowboy-playing kid waiting at home to complete his ensemble. Don’t think you can just floor it on the freeway and get home fast, buddy. Get pulled over pulling a stunt like that and Sheriff Junior will have to bail you out using that money from his piggy bank. That’s a pretty bad sign when your kid has to bail you out, you know? Especially when he’s dressed like Tom Mix and doesn’t have a badge that would make the cops in the station tip their own hats and smile because it’s in your jacket pocket (which got confiscated and is now sitting in a cardboard box along with your belt and shoelaces).

DPDC PS3 US EFS 2D RealYour parenting skills may be awful, but you may be better at playing video games. One suggestion, since you asked (and want to stay out of jail): Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut, coming exclusively to the PS3 on April 30, 2013, paradoxically expanding on the former Xbox 360 exclusive game with new content such as sharper visuals and better controls. Which, by the way would have helped YOUR driving, mister (or missus, as we know ladies sometimes shop for kid cowboys or cowgirls and  make mistakes on the road home too).

SWERY65_tinyAnyway, if you got REALLY lucky on the way back from that mall, it was most likely kind Officer Swery who pulled you over and let you go with a warning because he figured you’d be playing that game he worked on in his spare time at some point.

That and he’s got a real soft spot for your quirky side…

How To Use The Internet (A Primer for Really Stupid People)…

I'm with stupid It’s come to my attention over the years that a LOT of people don’t know how to use the Internet properly. Not that I really care, mind you… it’s just that it tends to get in the way of me enjoying the damn thing as it should be used. If you’re using the Internet correctly, this post is completely meaningless and you can stop here and go about your day as usual.

For the rest of you out there fumbling and bumbling about making fools of yourself everywhere you click and post (and not knowing you’re a total idiot while doing so), read on below the jump for two small but helpful tips (there are a lot more, but these two will help about 86.7% of you having issues, the national average) and leave the top of your head unscrewed so the learning juice can sink in and grow something other than weeds and poisonous mushrooms… Continue reading

Star Trek: Into Darkness International Trailer #2: Going Around The World With The Enterprise

 

And the hits just keep on coming in this latest international trailer for Star Trek: Into Darkness. In fact, there are a bunch of these up on the official Star Trek web site that are all slightly different for each territory. I’ve always found that a tad strange, but that’s why I’m not a PR person, I guess. Anyway, the film certainly looks like it’ll be pretty relentless and gloomy where it needs to be, but I’m holding off any ACTUAL judgments until my butt is parked in a comfy movie seat. Some of the more Horta-headed fans of the Trekkie and Trekker varieties want the slower-paced style back from the original series, TNG and the other shows, but given that trailers for blockbusters condense events and are SUPPOSED to be thrilling, I’m betting the film does do some of what’s expected foe those die-hards when all is said and done. As usual, folks… we shall see…

Hating Aliens: Colonial Marines? Well, It Could Be Better (or Worse) With A Bit of Retro Perspective…

 

ACM_PS3Given the critical drubbing that Sega’s Aliens: Colonial Marines has gotten across most of the Internet-verse, some gamers are still feeling the urge to play something that feels closer to James Cameron’s 1986 film than what ended up on store shelves. Well, allow me to assist in this matter (sort of). Track down a working Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum and MSX and a copy of Electric Dreams’ 1987 game, Aliens or the rather interesting (and free) PC remake over at Derbian Games and see what was scary to gamers of that era. Continue reading

Inventist, Your Swerver Quad Skates Make Me Want to Go Broke (In All The Right Ways)…

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swerver quad skatesHmmm. $395 is a bit steep for a cheap guy like me, but I saw these awesome feet-wheels at Toy Fair and immeduately wanted to take them for a test drive. I used to roller skate a bit in the 80’s (no, it wasn’t a disco thing, silly!) and early 90’s, but stopped once I actually broke a pair of old-school skates during a parade I was in (no, it wasn’t that type of a parade, silly!). Anyway, those slick Swever Quads promise with a “patented lean-to-turn design” that according to the official site “allows for increased stability when skating forwards or backwards, and more freedom of movement.” Hmmmm. They do look nice with jeans, yes?

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BC_ThorWell, no “Hmmm.” at all actually, as I’ve seen Inventist’s other products in action including the amazing Solowheel, which makes me crack up because I think of that old BC comic strip (which is STILL running, I just found out – just not in any NYC papers from what I’ve seen) and that “original” solo wheel cooked up by Thor back in the day. OK, so I’m mandated to get a gaming angle here by the other side of the brain, so here you go: a play through of the classic and slightly related to this post Commodore 64 game from 1983 called B.C.’s Quest for Tires. Hmmm… (again?) perhaps that NEXT Solowheel video can be a “remake” of the game? THAT would be really cool. Weird and funny as hell, but cool nonetheless…

 

 

(Thanks to Christian Liepold and his YouTube Channel for that video, by the way)

Defiance Ark Hunter Chronicles 5: Risk Versus Reward, Indeed…

 

How amusing that this week’s DEFIANCE AHC has this particular title. It also seems that’s the collective hive mind thinking of some MMO and shooter fans who somehow STILL don’t “get” this game after MONTHS of footage, previews and information that’s NOT leaked out in dribs and drabs by some “crafty” PR drone, but put up by Trion Worlds and syfy themselves. I still see posts calling this a “Halo” clone, a FPS, or asking if it has traditional MMO click and wait gameplay. Some people love the air in their bubbles, I guess. Personally, they just give me gas. Anyway, the game is fast-paced, fun and will probably surprise some of the jaded types. The only bit of confusion I see that’s a b it pesky for Trion is some think the game is offline as well when it’s not. I still think it SHOULD have an offline solo and co-op game (which would make it PERFECT for fans of Sandlot’s Earth Defense Force games), as well as get a Vita version with the same features. But perhaps we’ll see some other developer give that a go if the series takes off and there’s high interest in taking it to that level. As always… we shall see…

Deadly Premonition Director’s Cut Random Screenshot of the Day: Exercise!

DPDC PS3 US EFS 2D RealOK, so I’m a bit obsessed with this game but so it goes when it’s so damn bizarre, scary and funny all in one. Rather than run a gallery of what’s on the Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut PR page (because that’s just too easy!), I’m picking one screen per day from the folder and writing something stupid about it just for fun. I’m also writing this post randomly as well, so what I just called “stupid” may end up on another plane entirely (kind of like the game, which is hard to describe, but dips into its own vat of weird when it’s least expected).

Anyway, Francis York Morgan (our hero) and local sheriff with the bad-ass leather hat George Woodman do some bonding with one of the usual questions guys getting to know each other who just so happen to be working together on a particularly gory series of murders ask each other. Hey, anything to break out of the monotony of finding a new corpse, right? Ah, Greenvale – where the coffee’s black and amazing and the murderers very creative in how they display and dispatch their kills.

 

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IMG_2148Did I mention Francis York Morgan has a kind of creepy imaginary friend who he talks to in the game? No? Well, that’s why YOU need to be thinking about playing this one. Back tomorrow with a new screen and oddball commentary. PS3 only, April 30, 2013. Pre-order NOW from GameStop or Amazon if that’s your thing. Tell them SWERY65 (on the right) sent you. No discount if you do, but perhaps someone will think that’s cool on the other end of that Internet line you’re talking on…

Game of Thrones Season 3 Enemies Trailer: The Friend of My Enemy Is Probably Not Surviving The Season…

 

I was going to use “Keep your friends close and your enemies six feet under” as the title of this post, but I flipped a mental coin (hey, I may be just about broke this month, but I do have some change of mind left) and that other one won out. Anyway, it’s almost here and doesn’t look as if will disappoint much, if at all. Then again, a good episode of GoT SHOULD be disappointing once it’s over simply because you didn’t want it to end and you’re left with your eyes and mouth wide open because something really innnnnteresting happened that you least expected. Well, that’s better it happens in the show than in real life… unless it’s the Publishers Clearing House van pulling up and you’d forgotten all about that stupid sweepstakes you filled out while half-drunk on some wine one late night…

Review: MUD FIM Motocross World Championship (PS3)

MUD_TPCOVERPS3_3D_Eng_Fr_10-2_011013Platform: PS3 (also on Xbox 360, PC)

Developer: Milestone

Publisher: Namco Bandai Games

# of Players: 1 (Online 1 – 12)

ESRB Rating: T (Teen)

Official Site

Score: C+ (79%)

 

While it’s not without its flaws, MUD FIM Motocross World Championship manages to be a fun and fairly lengthy romp through the wild world of moto-x that mixes in arcade-style controls with some light to medium simulation elements. Veteran developer Milestone, known for its SBK bike race series and some pretty solid road and rally racing games, tackles this particular motor sport with relish as well as making more of an attempt to cater to a younger X Games fed audience and the results are mixed overall. More emphasis on reality (and more top US riders for the fans here in North America) would have been a better focus, as some of the “cool” bits feel a wee bit too forced. While there’s indeed a blast to be had here offline or on, the game can’t quite straddle both arcade and sim worlds and appeal to those who may have wanted a few more (and better) options. Continue reading