Random Film of the Week(end): LIFEFORCE

LIFEFORCE_MPIf you were a big sci-fi flick fan around in 1985 and of a certain age, you probably went and saw LIFEFORCE for one of two reasons. You were either a horny guy or gal looking for cheap thrills or you were the girlfriend, husband or wife of that horny guy or gal elbowing your man/woman in the ribs and hissing at him every time Mathilda May appeared on screen, naked as a jaybird or not. Of course, there were most likely couples who saw this and grinned together at her wondrous curves, but let’s not turn this into a more saucy post than it’s intended to be.

Granted, at least a jaybird had feathers and it’s a damn good thing women back in that era weren’t overly obsessed with strategic downstairs depilatory action or this film might not have been as fun to watch as there would need to be some even more strategic editing than what’s here. Based on Colin Wilson’s 1976 novel, The Space Vampires with a screenplay by Dan O’Bannon, directed by Tobe Hooper and chock full of some wild practical effects,lots of blood and some gore, scenery chewing performances from most of the cast and an ending that’s still a bit baffling on a few fronts, this is one of those films that you’ll either love outright for its craziness or hate because after all is said and done, it doesn’t do anything grand with its space vampires at all other than show off how nude they are… Continue reading

Monster World RPG Update (It’s Creeping Closer)…

Massimo and Fernando (aka MAX TEAM) are still debugging their baby so it arrives all ready to download and play, but Monster World RPG just may be the big (and FREE) ticket Sega fans are looking for when it comes to fan-made JRPG experiences. So much work and love has gone into this project that the game truly looks as if it’s a never released Genesis game. Granted, I’ve only played a few demos over the past year or two, but I’m confident that the end result will be well worth the long wait. I think there’s a month or so to go before this lands, but I say take your time, guys… take your time. I want this one to be perfect when I sit down and lose too many hours in it…

Happy Perihelion! Go Out And Get Some Sun Today (It’s A Lot Closer!)…

(Thanks, ClassicMovieTrailers!) 

Okay, so it’s not actually THAT hot out today, but yes, today is that day where the sun and earth are closest, which may not be any comfort at all to those of us who dislike the freezing weather and wish that closer hit star would do some rapid melting of what’s on the ground while super-heating the air around so it’s… well, just like that silly film clip above. Hey, silly – actual science doesn’t work that way and besides, things are already disrupted here enough (hotter, stranger summers and colder, stranger winters have been a thing for a while now). Oh, I know Perihelion isn’t a “day” to be celebrated like a traditional holiday – it’s just a term at the end of the day. So don’t go zipping into that big box party store looking for decorations any time soon.

You can however, get a fine start on next year’s Perihelion by going out and getting a few dozen boxes of glow in the dark stars of assorted sizes and a current map of the solar system and make a heroic attempt to recreate what’s on that map on your walls and ceilings. Er,I hope you live in a REALLY big house and don’t mind guests wondering who decorated your entire place like it was a planetarium gift shop. Or you could just do what everyone else here in the US does and wait until Aphelion (which is around July 4th) and get a free fireworks show as a backdrop for that non-holiday. One of those is a lot less maddening to accomplish (in most cases)…

It’s Friday Night! Time To Get Dancing, People!

Well, you’re still here and I’m still busy. Hmmm… what to do, what to do? Ah, this should keep you entertained for a hot minute (take it away, Gene!):

Now, THAT’S what I call ACTUAL reality TV, folks! I do miss the late, great Chuck Barris and all his bizarrely awesome programming that more or less changed the landscape of entertainment telly as we know it (yeah, for better and worse). Yeah, I know loads of substances were involved in the making of these shows back then, but there’s a certain insane purity to this stuff that’s FAR more honest than anything claiming to be “real” on TV today. Go dig up some old clips of the man’s huge body of work and see for yourself, I say…

How My Brain Works (Sometimes): Wie sauber schnee von den Stiefeln (mit musikalischer Begleitung)

So, it snowed a lot last night and part of this morning in a few too many places. Yeah, winter sucks. Anyway, as I was going outside into the stupidly cold air and saw that deeper than it looked but already mostly shoveled snowy white world, some guy comes into the building and starts stomping his feet, one at a time in a beat that made me chuckle because I watch too many movies and retain certain scenes in my head for future use. Why I do this I have zero idea, but I think it’s because it makes me laugh a lot when I see scenes from real life that remind me of made up movie bits.

Anyway, this is probably the ONLY proper comedic use of this interesting musical clip from The Battle of the Bulge. Toss in some crappy bing-translated German above (it’s supposed to say “How to clean snow from your boots (with musical accompaniment)”, but feel free to correct me if I’m wrong) and ta-da! That’s how the magic happens around here. Yeah, magic. “Hey, Rocky? Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat!”
:

  (Thanks, GunOfNeverone!) 

Or maybe I just need another cup of coffee. I think I only got about five or so hours of sleep between last night and this morning. Anyway, stay warm and stay the heck inside if you don’t need to be out in this mess. The things I do for you folks…

Bundle Stars Wants You To Win BIG (As In $500 Worth of Steam Games BIG)…

store-giveaway 

Wow. Simple entry procedure? CHECK, super prize for ten lucky winners? CHECK. All you need is a PC with enough hard drive space and the appropriate OS and 3D card and you’re good to go. Even if you don’t win a darn thing, you’ll now have a new site to ogle when you’re looking for great game deals where some of the proceeds go to charity. This bundle stuff seems to be the way things are going for many to snap up games of all types at great prices, so get used to it, folks. And if you DO win because you found out about this contest here, remember to put me in your will or something. Or even better, enjoy all those games and say goodbye to being bored for quite some time! And if you’re not a gamer, just pass this post along to someone who is and watch them do something resembling a back flip. Um, if they don’t stick that landing, it’s not my fault… but at least they tried, right?

I Might Not Make Any Resolutions This Year, But Some Of YOU Need To…

The Seat MonopolizerYeah, you know who you are, you too many seats taken on public transit, loud music blastin’ and/or cellphone talkin’, toe-pickin’, generally nasty to see in public types who think everywhere is perfect for your personal palace needs. You kings and queens of disgusting behavior are so bad that Miss Manners would throw you over her knee and spank you. But yes, she’s too darn nice for that (although I do believe she may change her mind on a few fronts this year).

You folks with the icky habits need to clean up your act this year, but at home and not out in public where you can make people want to toss their cookies at you. There are a few other people who can take that same train to Politeville, as it Just. So. Happens to make an scheduled stop in the village of Common Sense. Read on for two more types of fellow travelers who need a nice vacation and some proper reeducation about living in the modern age… Continue reading

Okay, CUPHEAD Is On My Game of the Year List (And It’s Not Even Done Yet)…

cuphead-idleI was in an odd mood today until I saw these two videos and now, I’m grinning like a squirrel that’s come across a crashed semi full of mixed nuts. CUPHEAD is a (currently) PC-only side-scrolling platformer from Studio MDHR with, well YES,a main character with a darn teacup for a head. Yeah, that was enough to get me grinning, but those gameplay teasers actually got me to laugh out loud because this is one of those oddball mash-ups that some developers have tried before with mixed results, but haven’t quite nailed.

CH_surpriseIf everything comes together and this delivers what its promising, I’m betting platformer fans make a beeline for this game on anything it eventually pops up on. That said, I don’t expect any actual cartoon or ton of licensed goodies to start dropping from the heavens at all (as I’d rather see any profits go into making more and better games in the future), but I think this dev team is off the a fine start. Keep and eye on this one, I say…

It’s Quiet in Here… Too Quiet…

For some odd reason, I have a bit of a block today. It’s not that I don’t have a pile of stuff to do here (he said, staring at his pile of stuff to do… which very politely sits there occasionally tipping its cap), it’s just that I’m almost literally at a loss for words. And when I can think of stuff, it’s as if it’s in another language. Bleh. Granted, you’re reading what I’m writing and therefore, I’m not at a TOTAL loss for words at all. It just that actual and more entertaining collections of letters and such aren’t coming out of the factory upstairs and that’s not a good thing at all. I’m not sure what the problem is, but I don’t think it will last long at all. I’ll run a self-diagnostic and post the results later. Or not. If things go as they should, this glitch will be shorter than it is longer and things will be back to normal soon.

Off to hit myself in the head with a hammer and see what happens. Back in a bit…

A Reminder of Unfinished Business, Courtesy of AMC…

TWD_S4II_Poster 

February 9th isn’t far away at all, especially the way time flies these days. That first half of the season ended on a pretty wild note of highs and lows for the survivors, so it’ll be interesting to see where things go once the last bunch of episodes this season roll out. I’m still NOT a fan at all of shows splitting up into waiting times like this, but it seems to be the new “normal” despite the big breaks in time that drive folks like me batty. Still it’s better than what AMC is doing to the final season of Mad Men, spreading out those final episodes over TWO YEARS, meaning way too much waiting around for a series of resolutions that will already be ancient by the time viewers get to see them. Oh well…