A Winter’s Tale, By Simon Bar Sinister…

(Thanks, bullwinklecanada!) 

Ah, so THAT explains everything. Well, sort of. This snow we’ve gotten around here has been odd for a few interesting reasons. Sure, it’s winter, but it’s not a normal winter at all, kids. In fact, I’ll bet you an old penny that Simon Bar Sinister has a big Polar Vortex machine up in a lab somewhere and it’s getting a hell of a workout all of a sudden. Someone call Underdog (again!), as that man needs his butt kicked but good. And Cad? Yeah, buddy… you’re going down as well, grrrr…

Misty Non-Mountain Brain Hopping (Winter Version)…


“What is that?” you ask? Well, that a look outside my window at about 4am or so Monday morning. It was so foggy and misty out that I wanted to snap a picture just for reference. I got this mess instead. So I tried again a few times and pretty much got the same result. Yeah, it’s not art or good photography, but what can I say? I was about to go to sleep and pop up less than two hours later to hit the laundry and get it over with before the cold snap hit. The weather has been getting pretty unusual over the past few years, but I can’t recall so many extremes in such a short time around here.

It was 75 degrees about a week or so ago and in the space of 24 hours here, the drop from the low 50’s to below zero is making news (and news reporters stupid). Granted, this stuff does happen in many places, but usually when it gets cold like this it stays like this for the better part of a week. As it stands, the snap here is just that, as temperatures are zipping up to about 40 in a day or so (it’s a regular heatwave!) and as usual, people are going into winter shopping panic mode, stocking up on things they stocked up on already as a form of exercise and protective paranoia.

foggy (1) foggy (2) foggy (3) foggy (4) foggy (5) foggy (6)

Granted, I’d prefer if some of those running around doing the headless chicken stayed the hell home and stopped coughing and sneezing around me and at least some of them would remember to bathe more regularly (seriously, there’s nothing like the scent of the great unwashed as you’re sitting in a public spot trying to write only to be distracted by a punch in the nose from a smelly person in smellier clothing who’s NOT homeless, mind you). But what can you do but hold your breath and perhaps raise and eyebrow in the general direction of someone offending. There’s no thrill quite like telling a total stranger to cover his nose and mouth as you’re covering your own from the germs and odor wafting your way. Yuck.

How My Brain Works (Sometimes): Wie sauber schnee von den Stiefeln (mit musikalischer Begleitung)

So, it snowed a lot last night and part of this morning in a few too many places. Yeah, winter sucks. Anyway, as I was going outside into the stupidly cold air and saw that deeper than it looked but already mostly shoveled snowy white world, some guy comes into the building and starts stomping his feet, one at a time in a beat that made me chuckle because I watch too many movies and retain certain scenes in my head for future use. Why I do this I have zero idea, but I think it’s because it makes me laugh a lot when I see scenes from real life that remind me of made up movie bits.

Anyway, this is probably the ONLY proper comedic use of this interesting musical clip from The Battle of the Bulge. Toss in some crappy bing-translated German above (it’s supposed to say “How to clean snow from your boots (with musical accompaniment)”, but feel free to correct me if I’m wrong) and ta-da! That’s how the magic happens around here. Yeah, magic. “Hey, Rocky? Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat!”

  (Thanks, GunOfNeverone!) 

Or maybe I just need another cup of coffee. I think I only got about five or so hours of sleep between last night and this morning. Anyway, stay warm and stay the heck inside if you don’t need to be out in this mess. The things I do for you folks…