If I Had a Hammer (I’d Hit Myself On the Head) Redux

Feh. This past week or so has been a bit too insane partially thanks to more apartment repairs disrupting the daily routine. I didn’t sleep at all Monday night thanks to moving stuff around the apartment (and writing up a game review), so I was passed out by noon Tuesday with a Blu-Ray playing (yes, you should buy this) and a cup of coffee I somehow managed not to spill a drop of. It’s pretty hilarious to wake up all bleary-eyed with a cup of coffee in your hand a guy working on your wall about ten feet away and a subtitled Japanese movie playing. I think the poor plasterer was trying to figure out if I spoke the language or how I could watch a movie with my eyes closed, but I like to confuse people whenever I can. Mission accomplished!

Well, not really…

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PC Review: The Deadly Tower of Monsters

SCARLET_MODEL_1Platform: PC (also on PS4)

Developer: ACE Team

Publisher: Atlus

# of Players: 1

MSRP: $14.99

ESRB Rating: T (Teen)

Official Site

Score: B+ (85%)

 

DTOM (38) 

Yep, they’ve gone and done it again. Chilean developer ACE Team’s latest game, The Deadly Tower of Monsters is a solid and fun ride that’s going to tickle the fancy of those gamers young to old with a knowledgeable love for “B” movies, primarily of the sci-fi variety. The Unreal engine-powered stylized visuals look great, and the offbeat humor comes from a few angles expected and surprising. While the game may not seem all that lengthy, finding some of its secrets will take some effort. A few flaws (that can be patched) keep it from perfection, but overall this is one of those great little sleepers you’ll want to take for a spin and add to your game library.

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10 Cloverfield Lane: Surprise! J.J.’s Dy-no-mite Trailer Blows Up the Internet


 

Ha and double ha. It seems producer/director J.J. Abrams is The Master of Surprise (not to be confused at all with The Master of Disguise). It also seems no one knew about this new film at all until the trailer dropped on the 15th followed by the sound of jaws dropping and keyboard tongues waggling for days since. Judging by the tagline on that poster, the very brief plot synopsis on IMDB and some bits gleaned from a few re-viewings, it’s clearly *not* a “sequel” to Cloverfield at all (despite all the “Cloverfield 2” posts online since this trailer dropped), but a film that seems to have a similar tone of stuff “out there” and how folks react to it.

10_cloverfield_lane 

As for that cast, John Goodman? Great in pretty much any role he’s taken and who doesn’t like Mary Elizabeth Winstead? Okay, you three in the back? Get lost. Never heard of the other guy, but I may have seen something he’s in and not recalled his generic mug at all. Hey, I’m getting old… but two out of three ain’t bad in terms of the actors here. Anyway, March 11 is coming up sooner than you think and this may be quite the ride through paranoia whether or not it’s got any monsters in it at all.

As always, we shall see…

Lovely Planet Arcade: The Unknown Known Gets A Fast Followup


 

LPA_headerI’ve heard about, but actually NEVER played Lovely Planet (*gasp!*), so I guess I now need to, thanks to developer QUICKTEQUILA and publisher tinyBuild Games announcing this maybe it’s a sequel? return to the colorful pastel world of the first game. If the zippy and amusing videos of the first game are any indication as to what’s in the second, players can expect a load of challenge and even more good times when the game jumps out of the developer’s talented hands and lands on Steam later this year. Hey, don’t trust me on that last sentence at all – just go read about the game using on of the links above.

I think by the time LPA is released I’ll have played the first game. I hope. My backlog is a mountain of code that needs to be scaled and the clock is always ticking…

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Road to Ballhalla: Brains of Steel Required in This Humorous Hybrid


 

tinyBuild is at it again with another upcoming game bound to entertain and get you out of the casual funk into something far funkier. Road to Ballhalla is coming around the middle of 2016 and if that trailer bove is any indication, it will make a mockery of your gaming skills while teaching you a few things about proper reading comprehension. This will lead to you ignoring real world stuff like speed limit signs or proper parking procedures, which in turn will lead to you having to fight tickets of all sorts by explaining how this game taught you not to trust everything you read. Aha. tinyBuild wants you to disobey rules and orders just so you’re super cautious but still make ridiculous mistakes because you’re silly enough to take what a game it teaching you about IT and try to use those rules in the real world.

tinyBuild, you are EVIL. I still want to play all your games, though (so you’re not so evil after all).

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Agatha Christie: The ABC Murders: Get Yours Before Someone Else Gets Theirs

ABC Murders cover logo 4Mystery fans on the trail of the whereabouts of Microids’ upcoming Agatha Christie: The ABC Murders now have a fresh clue as to the location of the game. This latest trailer shows off more nicely stylized visuals and Hercule Poirot doing what he does best.

The game will hit retail and digital outlets for PC/Mac, PS4 and Xbox One February 4, 2016 in Europe and February 23, 2016 in North America. Pre-orders for the PC version are being taken on gog.com and Steam, both at a temporary 20% discount off the $29.99 retail price.

ABC allpacks ESRB Final 

The King of Oddball Asides wants me to note that Monsieur Poirot wears his gloves all the time in that trailer and that makes him a suspect as well. But The King of Oddball Asides is indeed an oddball himself. Anyway, Microids would very much like it if you crept up on them one of these days and got all nosy like a certain Belgian detective. In English, follow them using the links below:

Website: http://www.Microids.com

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/microids

Twitter http://www.twitter.com/Microids_off

Pinterest http://www.pinterest.com/microids

The Final Station: A Hell of a Commute Coming Your Way


What the heck is going on over at tinyBuild Games these days? All they seem to do is make games, and damn good ones at that. That’s not supposed to happen at all, folks. Where are the crowdfunded failures, the whiny employees griping about long hours as they spend too much time hanging out on message boards responding to the slightest complaint about an Early Access game that didn’t work or ate someone’s save files? Nope, I don’t see that here. Just more games that want me to play them when they’re out. Stupid indie developer!

TFS_06

All kidding aside, tinyBuild’s upcoming The Final Station looks really fantastic. Take one part survival horror, one part train simulator and you get innovation wrapped up in yummy, excellently animated pixel visuals that end up more lifelike than some big buck AAA release that has every map bumped and requires you to upgrade your 3D card. Anyway, go add this one to your Steam wishlist (it’s set for a summer 2016 launch) and be prepared for more, as this week the developer has been introducing a new upcoming title for the last three days with a fourth and final one to get an announcement tomorrow. I’ll do a post on each as soon as I un-bury myself from a little backlog I’m staring at.

TFS_GIF

TFS_07 TFS_01 TFS_03

 

Four More Arrow Video Releases Landing Soon

NikkatsuDG_AV037 Your movie collection is about to get four more titles larger thanks to Arrow Video’s upcoming releases though MVD Entertainment Group. January brings you Nikkatsu Diamond Guys Volume 1 (1/26/16, $49.95 MSRP), a set of three films from the famed Japanese studio from directors Seijun Suzuki (Voice Without a Shadow), Toshio Masuda (Red Pier) and Buichi Saito (The Rambling Guitarist).

Hideaki Nitani,Yujiro Ishihara, and Akira Koabyashi  are the Diamond Guys represented in this first volume, so this set will be another essential for fans of Japanese cinema. This set also makes me wonder if there’s a Nikkatsu Diamond Gals series coming at some point as I can think of a few actresses who worked for the studio that merit a collection like this. Amusingly enough, as I was typing this, the mail arrived and yep, those Diamond Guys are nowhere. I know what I’m doing this evening, folks.
 

ShebaBaby_AV042February brings Pam Grier to you in fine form indeed, but don’t get any bad ideas, buster. William Girdler’s 1975 blaxploitation hit Sheba, Baby (2/9/2016) will set you straight for the more than reasonable price of $29.95 plus tax where applicable.

One of Pam’s three flicks from that busy year (the other two being Bucktown and Friday Foster, both of which really deserve the Arrow treatment along with an all-new interview with Pam on her magnificent body of work), this one’s probably the most noteworthy in my book. Word on the street is you’re going to get it or someone will give it to you but good (well, if you’re lucky, that is…).
 

PrayForDeath_AV039 Pray For Death ($29.95) also comes your way in February (2/16/2016) and if you’re into mid 80’s action flicks, this one’s got you name all over it in big neon letters. Martial arts star Sho Kosugi (Enter The Ninja) gets his kicks on some poor villainous dopes who try to ruin his American dream.

Revenge fans, take note: director Gordon Hessler (Scream and Scream Again) amps up the violence here with a killer finale that shows Sho showing up a bunch of baddies, badly maiming them to the point that the don’t need an ambulance at all, but a nice meat wagon to take what parts remain to the closest cannibal stew pot. Ouch.
 

AmericanHP_AV043Speaking of horrors, American Horror Project Volume 1 ($99.95) hits at the end of February (2/23/2016) in a limited edition of 3000 copies, bringing three restored and hard to find fright flicks to you… if you dare (or something like that).

Malatesta’s Carnival of Blood(1973), The Witch Who Came from the Sea (1976), and The Premonition (1976) all get the 2K treatment and a wealth of special features horror film aficionados will appreciate. This series in particular piques my interest because there are plenty of films I can recall partially from my younger days that have yet to appear on a decent home video format in the US. Granted, some of those are in the public domain, but in pretty lousy condition. Having the fine folks at Arrow give these three oldies a new life is the best thing that’s happened to them in decades.

Now Playing: The Deadly Tower of Monsters

DTOM_POSTER-1---75cm-x-55cm
 

I love it when a plan comes together. While I can’t reveal anything score-wise until the review embargo lifts, ACE Team’s latest game is so far, pretty awesome. Especially if you love old “B” sci-fi flicks from the last century in all their intentional and unintended cheesy glory. That is all (for now). Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some chuckling whilst playing to do.

Marvel Comics Fans: Uncle Milton (Stark?) Needs Your Aid

Uncle Milton - Avengers Tesseract 20Q - Product Image (7) 

If you’re a Marvel Comics fan, your Uncle Milton needs your assistance with a new project, stat! “Who’s your Uncle, now?” NO, not that Uncle Milton. The other one who’s still around that makes all those cool science-themed gadgets and gizmos that sometimes pop up as usefully educational gifts from time to time. That’s who! Anyway, Uncle Milton is going to be introducing the Marvel Avengers Tesseract 20Q game this coming fall and they want Marvel fans from anywhere on the planet to go HERE and help out with the artificial intelligence by playing a few games that will help the 20Q become a smarter product. Your heroic efforts will not go unrewarded, as smarter toys and games is something that makes for endless reply value.

Now, you KNOW you can trust your Uncle Milton, right? Sure, the Tesseract 20Q may seem as if it’s somewhat *sinister*, but that’s actually part of its appeal. Hey, if it does happen to have cosmic powers after all, the worst thing that could happen is you beat it once and get a free trip to Asgard. Well, provided that Tesseract hasn’t been *borrowed* (again!) and is in the hands of some nefarious would-be world eating alien presence. Which would most likely mean you may want the Avengers HQ phone number in your speed dial. Just in case.

Anyway, go test out that 20Q and make sure to follow Uncle Milton at the links below:

Uncle Milton Social Media Channels:

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/unclemilton

Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/unclemiltontoys

YouTube Channel: http://www.youtube.com/UncleMilton1

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/unclemilton

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/unclemilton

-GW