FedEx Gets To Be The Bad Guy… And Almost Succeeds

Posted on November 1, 2015 by geelw

Yikes. I think FedEx hates me. Or at least stuff they need to deliver safely. Anyway, that’s the box I got from a few days back above, so I guess someone at the company is still mad at me for yelling at a driver who tried to deliver a box of stuff a few weeks back after 10pm on a Friday with not so much as a courteous phone call beforehand to say a VERY after hours delivery was coming. Why take someone’s phone number and stick it on the label if it’s not going to be used? Hey, you’d be as cranky as I was when you have the occasional dope who rings the doorbell downstairs claiming to have a package when they’re just trying to gain entry into the building. Hell, I didn’t even think FedEx or UPS delivered after 9pm except for holidays when delivery times are all over the map and it’s expected that stuff said to arrive in a day shows up late in that day.

Anyway, did the contents of that beat to hell box survive the trip? That would be telling, but let’s just say I was pleasantly surprised. But FedEx needs its drivers to shape up and knock it off with the box-busting handling.

The Last Crown: Midnight Horror – Iceberg’s Happier Halloween Adventure Looks Like A Winner

Posted on October 30, 2015 by geelw

You should SEE my backlog, ladies and germs. It’s huge and scary like a mountain and just as hard to move. That said, Darkling Room‘s new game The Last Crown: Midnight Horror looks really fun. I’d never even heard of the developer until I got an email about this one and how it’s a lighter fright game that’s also an in-between chapter of The Lost Crown and the still in development The Last Crown: Blackenrock, two adventure games I now need to also play at some point. No experience with the first game is needed here as the game’s Halloween theme makes it a standalone “between cases” experience.

Take a gander at the trailer and screens below the jump and if you like what you see, you can grab the game on Steam for a mere $4.49, 50 cents of the normal price of $4.99 (a total BARGAIN for such a cool-looking throwback). Continue reading →

Gone Fishing, Thanks to Sekai Project

Posted on October 28, 2015 by geelw

Well, lookit! I got a FREE ticket to the Manten Aquarium from Sekai Project. Nice, and THANKS, guys! I haven’t been to the aquarium for quite a while so I hope I have a REALLY good time.

Hey, as long as those little and big fishies stay in their tanks and there’s no shenanigans going on involving a bunch of visiting Japanese high school kids going missing and having horrific things happening to them, I bet I’ll have a blast.

“La, la, la,laaaaaa…” Oops:

*Sigh…* Once again, this is why we can’t have nice things. Officer, I didn’t see a thing, sir.

Sound of Drop — fall into poison — is out on Friday, October 30 for PC via Steam. You’ll find out about my trip around then. Er, if I make it back in one piece…

THE PARK: Fear Rides The Fairway in Funcom’s New Horror Quickie

Posted on October 28, 2015 by geelw

A trip to the amusement park really goes off the rails in Funcom’s new short first-person psychological horror experience, THE PARK, now available for PC on digital platforms Steam, Humble Store, NVIDIA GeForce Now Store, Green Man Gaming, and GamersGate for $9.99, a 23% savings on the game’s $12.99 MSRP. If you’re like me and thinking “Hey, doesn’t Funcom only make big-budget MMO experiences these days?” Well, you’re not 100% wrong there. And you’re not 100% correct, either. Funcom wants you to know they’re not all about those expensive to produce and addictive online time-sinks these days:

“Thanks to similar games in the narrative space, such as ‘Gone Home’, ‘Dear Esther’ and ‘The Stanley Parable’, we are confident that there is a place in the gaming industry for shorter, intense experiences,” says Funcom creative director Joel Bylos. “Technically, it explores the limits of what is possible for a team to achieve with a small budget, short deadline and a strong focus.”

Aha. Well, short and horrific seem to be selling well these days, Funcom does have the talent to make it work and hey, at ten bucks… that’s less than a movie ticket and you don’t just get to sit there and get scared while choking on your popcorn. THE PARK seems like a game that while brief, is going to get people talking. Or in this era of social video site streaming, sitting down in front of their monitors watching someone play and freak out. Hmmmm. You can probably have someone feed you popcorn while you play this one. Just don’t be surprised at all if that a piece of that slimy “buttered” junk ends up shoved into a nostril at some point because Fatima peeled out of the room in fear an stuck that corn in the first orifice he or she could reach.

Sometimes, it’s best to experience certain types of horror alone. Or at least after you have your popcorn.

Shadowgate on iOS: Castle of Doom Goes All Touchy-Feely

Posted on October 26, 2015 by geelw

Oh joy! Or should I say Zo-Joi! Shadowgate is now available on the iPad. $4.99 gets you this revamped classic that was a PC exclusive now on your tap and slide tablet of choice (well,if your tap and slide tablet of choice happens to be an iPad 3 or better). While not a “horror” game per se, exploring the gloomy deathtrap that is Castle Shadowgate can be a bit frightening at times. Hey, when you walk into a room filled with treasure and see that rather pissed off dragon eyeballing you, you’ll either get smart and get lost or get greedy and roasted up but good. Unless you have a certain item that can withstand a blast of fire or two. Yes, that was a free game tip.

The beautiful artwork in this remake alone is worth the five bucks you’ll spend. Fortunately, Zojoi has made the new version of their 1987 classic every bit as devious and challenging as the original with even more to do and some super-challenging difficulty options for you adventure game masters out there. As if this wasn’t a good enough deal, Zojoi has also gone and made iOS versions of its four original MacVenture Series games. For $1.99 each you can play the classic Shadowgate, The Uninvited, Deju Vu and Deja Vu II.

And yes indeed, The Uninvited IS a horror game (and a good one at that):

I shall leave you with the lovely lady in red above (that’s blood, by the way… YOUR blood!)- go get some yourself cheap classics today and have yourself an adventure (or four).

Playmates Has Your All-Season TMNT Solution Wrapped Up Nicely

Posted on October 21, 2015 by geelw

Clever, Playmates, clever – making those Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Power Sound FX Combat Gear sets (MSRP $19.99, ages 4 and up) arrive just in time for not only Halloween, but in more than enough time for Christmas gift-giving. Leo, Mikey, Raph, and Donnie’s Battle Gear are all available now and combined with a few of Playmates other cool TMNT items, make for excellent costume enhancers (or can double for actual costumes if the weather is warm and the kids don’t want to sweat it out in full regalia).

(Thanks, TMNTToys!)

Add in the Deluxe Role Play Shell (MSRP $14.99), one of the Deluxe Masks (MSRP $15.99), and maybe a set or two of those short range Walkie Talkies (MSRP $19.99) so everyone can keep in touch (although you’ll only be a few feet maximum from your pack, right? Good.) and you’re good to go for some quality trick or treating. If you’ve got one kid who’s a big TMNT fan, picking out his or her favorite Turtle should be pretty easy going. On the other hand, if you’re the proud parent of a small brood that just so happens to number between two and four, things could get slightly tricky if the kids tend to like the same turtles and get a little cranky if they can’t all be the one they like. Below the jump is a quick and fun solution to that issue. Continue reading →

Earth Defense Force 4.1: Xseed Reminds You Your Holiday Season Will Be A Total Blast

Posted on October 21, 2015 by geelw

Sandlot, I just LOVE what you’ve done with the PS4 hardware. The Japanese developer’s first game for the console, Earth Defense Force 4.1: The Shadow of New Despair isn’t just a simple “port” of their last game at all. New enemies, missions and gear are here for EDF veterans to play around with and the MUCH smoother frame rate (okay, 60fps dipping to 30 at chaotic times is a great thing for the series) and all new lighting effects make the game finally up to snuff with modern action games. Granted, the gameplay is still the beautiful old-school tough it needs to be on the higher difficulty levels. But now we old-timers won’t have to listen to newbies gargling out complaints about the major slowdown and choppiness or other issues the series was known for in previous installments.

My sole complaint with the game is the ESRB rating. Some parents won’t buy “M” rated games for the brood because they just don’t (cue remembrances of them falling for little Johnny sneaking Grand Theft Auto game on the holiday gift list that one time, oops!). But what’s here is a crazy amount of fun whether played solo or online with friends and yep, family. Anyway, don’t let a bit of bug blood and an occasional PG-13 swear keep you from this one. That well over 80 hours of giant bug/lizard/robot/spaceship blasting you’ll be doing will help get the family in shape for any space alien invasion. And if they happen to be friendly aliens… well, we can at least hope they like videogames about fantastic impossibilities such as this game shows off sowell.

The Force Awakens My Slightly Cranky, Eternally Poor Side

Posted on October 19, 2015 by geelw

Here are your heroes and villains on a crowded poster. Whee. I’m going to go see this, but more as a curious former super-fan who just wants to see how well director J.J. Abrams is going to try and nail the same feeling the first film had and to check out what the writing is like. The original Star Wars came at a crucial time where Hollywood movies were getting great, glum and gloomy (Taxi Driver, anyone?) to the point where something like George Lucas’ inspired sci-fantasy pastiche with its groundbreaking visual effects (for the time) made suddenly happier audiences rush back to theaters multiple times, buy up every bit of merchandise as it was announced and add more fuel to Hollywood’s now common sequel frenzy.

I’m not much of a big merch guy these days, but I do feel a tiny bit sorry for some Star Wars fans who want every freebie out there these theaters are going to hand out. Good Luck, pal. Seeing the list of different items on the official Star Wars site made me a bit annoyed because it’s going to be nearly physically impossible for ONE person to grab each of these items unless they’re willing to do a LOT of traveling, have family or friends in the movie theater business who don’t mind setting aside goodies, other friends and family who will be getting trampled by Grabby the Hutt during the handout phase or maybe they’ll just luck out on eBay after the fact. Of course, watch me proven VERY wrong by some fans who not only manage to get one or more of all those freebies legitimately, but post all about it for the world to see.

Eh, whatever happened to just enjoying a movie and maybe going to see it again with a friend. These days, it’s all a cash grab roundup that shuts less than enthused moviegoers out of the loop. Well,no complaints about the movie here – just a mild trip down the ventilation shaft with s side track into the compactor room. Heh, maybe I’ll just hold out for the inevitable Blu-Ray release in what… February or March? I don’t want to get Greedo-ed on the way to the theater because some irate SW fan-person in full regalia decides to bump me off because they didn’t like what I said.

READS: The Haunt of Fear Still Packs A Moldy Wallop

Posted on October 19, 2015 by geelw

Sometimes a good old scare is all you need and with Halloween right around the corner (with a baseball bat in claw), you can stay safely indoors and get your fright on thanks to Dark Horse Comics. They’ve been reprinting a bunch of lovely volumes of classic EC Comics and the latest, The EC Archives: The Haunt of Fear Volume 2 comes highly recommended. Coming to a comic shop near you October 28, this 216-page full color hardcover collects The Haunt of Fear #7–#12 and features art from Johnny Craig, Graham Ingels, Jack Davis, Jack Kamen, George Roussos, Ed Smalle, and Joe Orlando. I’ll tease you with a page from the very first tale in the book, a real corker called Room For One More:

I think that rather unbalanced Rodney needs to reconsider his greed for that last space in the family mausoleum before it’s too late, right? As usual, the book compiles the issues in their entirety including all the original ads, text pieces, and letter columns. Nope, you can’t order anything from those well-aged adverts, but reading the letters should get you smiling at how some took these illustrated tales of terror to heart back in the day. Feel free to also check out previous volumes in Dark Horse’s EC Archives for even more variety in classic horror, sci-fi, crime, humor and more stories from the pre-Comics Code days.

READS: Contemporary Krampus Will Put You In The Proper Holiday Spirit (OR ELSE)…

Posted on October 19, 2015 by geelw

Mike Drake (photo: Peter Keehn)

Just in time for Halloween and definitely an excellent Christmas gift that’s actually a reminder to watch your back and be good (or else!), Contemporary Krampus: A Modern Look At An Ancient Legend ($24.00) offers up a collection of professional and fan art that makes for quite a memorable chunk of nightmare fuel. Curated by Mike Drake (who did that stupendous cover above), you’ll get almost 70 striking images from traditional drawing and painting, to sculpture and even a few takes on the ugly Christmas sweater (but you’ll probably want one of the ones in the book).

Drake also contributes a nifty into to Contemporary Krampus and how this Anti-Claus has slowly but surely seeped into American culture over the years to the point that we’ll be seeing a Krampus horror flick hit theaters in time for Christmas. Nicely naughty AND not a low budget schlocker judging by the cast.

You should run out and buy this book just because it’ll make you grin and cringe simultaneously. But if you’ve read this far, live in one of the 50 states of the U.S. of A. (Yes, you need to have a US shipping address!) and want to WIN a copy of the book, just respond below with I WANT KRAMPUS! and I’ll pick ONE lucky winner tomorrow from those who’ve entered.

Want more fun? Well, if you’re a card-carrying adult and just so happen to be in the New York City area for Halloween, you should attend the Ripley’s Believe It Or Not Times Square Halloween Party.

This adults only event will feature not only Drake signing copies of Contemporary Krampus, but also giving away a life-size Krampus (!) to one lucky attendee. Additionally, over 45 “special” exhibits will be pulled from the Ripley vaults and displayed exclusively to those brave enough to attend. The event will also feature:

A twisted game show
Psychic readings
Hypnotism shows with audience participation
Close-up magic
Day of the Dead candy celebration (at midnight)

To purchase tickets for this exclusive event (and they’re selling out quickly!), fans of the macabre need just click HERE (Boooo!)