The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt VGX Trailer: Oy, Geralt!

Wow. Well, you certainly can’t say CD Projekt RED is slacking off one bit, as every little update and scrap of footage that rolls out from the Polish developer is more and more incredible. I’ve only watched this twice and I’m already thinking about selling off unused body parts to afford something to play this on. Unfortunately, I need all of my parts just in case, so I’m accepting volunteers to donate to the cause. Cash or parts, I can find a use for either, a ha ha. (Sings):“Gonna make me a monsterrrrrrr… gotta stitch and sewwww…” Okay, not REALLY, as my sewing skills stink and my freezer is a bit too small to fit in my own head, much less YOURS. Besides, you need that head to read this site and at least ONE hand to click around, correct? You’re safe, dear reader… you’re safe… for now (Dun, dun DUNNNNNNNNN!).

Yeah, it’s been a long day here, kids…

Review: Valhalla Knights 3

VK3_coverPlatform: PlayStation Vita

Developer: K2

Publisher: Xseed Games/Marvelous AQL

# of Players: 1 – 7

ESRB Rating: M (Mature)

Official Site

Score: B- (75%)

2013-10-26-005227For some people, anything resembling sexual behavior in a video game seems to set them off ranting about things they don’t want to do (play the game in public or show it off to friends and family) or didn’t see at all thanks to overreacting and imposing arbitrary rules of the real world where it never needs to be. All I’ll say is this: if you can watch this music video without curling up into a ball in a corner and whining about it being too racy or sexist or prurient, you’re probably mature enough to play (and even enjoy) Valhalla Knights 3.

K2’s new Vita exclusive may not be the best looking game on Sony’s handheld and what’s here often feels a wee bit unfinished, needing actual interactivity in the environments in the form of destructible objects and structures that could be actually entered in some outdoor maps. While there are some amusing and dramatic moments to be found, the main plot could have also used a bit more spice, as it offers up some interesting ideas that don’t mature past a certain point…
Continue reading

Dark Souls II Update: 18 New Screens, Same Old Waiting For That Release Date To Roll Around…

Behold, adventurers! Or something like that. Okay, I got lazy and didn’t convert the LAST set of Dark Souls II screens from bitmap to JPEG (WordPress HATES bitmaps, it seems!), but thankfully, Denny Chiu at Namco Bandai still likes me (Hi, Denny!). Thanks to him, my inbox was blessed with these new screens I will more than verily happily share with you below:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

There, that was simple enough, right? I’ll get those other screens up soon as well with an appropriately goofy post about why it took so damn long. I blame a faulty TARDIS circuit, a rogue dinosaur and a bag of shrimp chips past its sell date, but that excuse may change…

Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut Gets Patched Up But Good* on Steam…

DPTDC_PC_patchedDPTDC_SALEEDIT! Guess what, kids? The game is now part of the big, big Steam Autumn Sale and is a WHOPPING 50% OFF unitl December 3, 2013!  That’s right, a measly $12.49 gets you the game all patched up and ready to go! Woo-hoo!

Hoo-ray! I think I’m the ONLY one that doesn’t mind the game’s non-adjustable resolution (*the main thing some still want to whine about who may not think the patch fixes EVERYTHING), but as someone who plays primarily console titles (well, there’s about a 70-30 mix), no controller support was a big pain in the wrists and lower for me. Anyway, the list of changes is HERE, so if you’ve been on the fence about this one, it should at least be easier to control if you’re coming from a console background. NOTE: You’ll need an official wired Xbox 360 controller for best results. I guess a wireless pad will also work, but I used my wired controller so I don’t need to recharge or replace any batteries. Also, this is currently only for the Steam version, but I’d gather a gog.com patch is also incoming.

Yes, Virginia, There Will Be A New Deadly Premonition Game. Eventually…

D4_D 

Swery65_dOh, Frabulous Joy Or Whatever, Department: Can I get an “FK in the Coffee!” in the house (to go, light and sweet)?!! According to the fine folks at GamingBolt, Swery 65 says he was working on a sequel to Deadly Premonition during the time he was coming up with what’s turned into the Xbox One exclusive, D4. Granted, this is only noted at the end of a sentence, there’s no HUGE reveal of info about how far along that work went and the interview is 99.9% about D4 (and a good read), so don’t look too much at that 2014 calendar and start rubbing your hands for a release date on that DP follow-up.

The interview also COMFIRMS that D4 is an Xbox One exclusive (argh!), not a DP sequel or related in any way and will contain a load of “Easter Eggs” and other elements to give it more replay value. So now that that’s settled, I guess some Swery fans will be dropping five large to get an Xbox One JUST to play this game. I’m a huge fan of the man’s body of work, but I may be passing this game up entirely unless there’s a price drop on that console and that game comes complete on a disc at some point in the future. To date, it’s the ONLY reason I’m remotely interested in Microsoft’s new service console, as I don’t play online “bro” shooters, have ZERO interest in sports and have plenty of movies that I can watch on cable in a MUCH better quality than any streamed content. Your own mileage may vary, of course…

Dying Light Lighting Tech Demo: Enjoy It Now – You’ll Be Running Like Hell Later…

 
Veteran developer Techland has been making some phenomenal-looking games for a number of years for consoles and PC, but Dying Light looks to be their best work to date. This mere 40 seconds of a recent tech demo shows off some pretty stellar lighting effects, a bit of a zombie problem and hopefully some nice hiding spots as I understand that when the sun drops from the sky, those undead get fierce and harder to put down. Which is why I’ll prefer to stay home and play the game as opposed to popping my head and body out the door to pick up a quart of 2% and some cat food, only to get jumped by some undead in the process. Heck, I don’t even own a cat! “Good Night Good Luck”, indeed… MY slogan would be “Hide and Sleep”…

Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes Gets Slightly Nostalgic for 1998…

 
I actually got another mighty chuckle going when Hideo Kojima showed that trailer above at the PlayStation 4 launch in NYC last week. I’d been thinking for a few months now it would be wonderful if any developer or publisher who had a key launch or other title for the original PlayStation did something like a remake with all-new visuals, but of course, Kojima goes and has his team get retro in the weirdest manner possible. Hey, it works for me, being a fan of Metal Gear Solid and all. But I know that some younger gamers saw this trailer and nearly spit up their Red Bull because they’ve yet to experience the glory that was (and is) the original MGS. Granted, that Fox Engine is pretty mighty at doing outstandingly realistic visuals on the PS3, PC and other platforms, so there’s no doubt that Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes will do well when it lands in a few places (retail and digital) at some point OK< Spring 2014). Yeah, yeah… David HAyter has been replaced by Keifer Sutherland as the voice (and face) of Snake, but I think I'm one of the few who shed a tear and moved on quickly. I have more urgent things to think about besides who's being paid to portray an iconic character – I just want the game to be memorable and really well written.

 
And here’s about 13 minutes of the game with no chunky Snake to ogle. enjoy!

The Incredible Adventures of Van Helsing Complete Pack Now On Steam!

VanHelsingCompletePackHmmm… I never got around to playing The Incredible Adventures of Van Helsing when it was initially released on Steam, but it looks like me not getting that review code I asked for was a good thing. A fre friends I recommended this one based on the screens and movies dug it quite a bit, so my job was done on that front. I guess I need to go crack open the piggy bank now as NeoCore Games has been toiling away on making their baby an even more complete action/RPG experience. Got that Steam account warming up in the background? Good – let’s see what’s in the digital box now, shall we? Lift up that coffin lid, please and peek below the jump… Continue reading

The Walking Dead Game of the Year Edition: Oh, Yes. Yes, You Must…

 
It’s the brilliant writing, folks… but the excellent stylized visuals (done in the style of the award winning comic) aren’t bad at all. 2012’s best game by many accounts is coming back from the undead as a complete package with the 400 Days DLC and some nice bonuses and yes indeed, although I have the disc version AND the PSN downloads, I’ll be picking this GOTY edition up simply out of habit (well, that and I haven’t yet gotten the 400 Days content update since my PS3 currently isn’t connected to PSN). Trust me, if you haven’t played this yet and know someone with a PC, PS3 or Xbox 360 who doesn’t yet have this one, get it for them (well, make sure they’re 18 or over first!) and stick around to watch them play. Bet you’re sucked in right from the opening moments and you stick around to see what happens and who makes it through those chapters in one piece (or close to one piece)…

Valhalla Knights 3 Gets MORE New DLC. Game Definitely NOT Over!

VK3LCDLCWait, what? OK, I missed last week’s update thanks to me being buried in too many other games and other stuff, but it’s all good. So far I’m spending too much time playing this game and it seems Xseed Games NEVER wants me to stop. New content packs include last week’s “Good Cat Food” and “Foreigners No. 1” DLC that add some figurative (or is it literal) walking around money (every step gains gold!) and a new class to unlock and THIS week’s “Lady Clerks Set” and “Foreigners No. 2” that add a few new girls to the shops and another new class to learn once you beat the tough boss it gives you in the quest you’ll find at one of the guilds.

Xseed has more to come next week and most likely for the next few weeks, all of which are great for this action/RPG that’s much better than the reviews are saying. I’ve one of my own reviews to write (it’s about half done) that should help anyone on the fence decide if this one’s worth their gaming dollar (it is, but it’s not perfect and NOT for the kiddies). Alright, let me shut up here and get back to the game as once again… thing are getting innnnteresting in the story. Of course, there’s that VK3 Gold Edition Japan is getting that adds a lot of improvements and such that I hope to heck we see here at some point… but I’ll let Xseed take care of that when they need to and not say another peep until it’s a confirmed release here in the U.S. of A….