Thief “Stories From The City” Video Won’t Steal Your Heart (But Your Wallet Is Suddenly Lighter)…

Poor Garrett needs a little love and fast. The internet trolls under every bridge leading to Eidos Montreal’s HQ are pooping out so many negative comments about a game they’ve yet to play based on nothing but some in progress gameplay footage and a lack of perspective and understanding game development that the new Thief may be doomed before it even leaves the studio. Of course, people like me will give the game a shot because we have no psychic powers and tend to believe in developers who try to make good games worth playing.

Granted, yes, the original Thief and its first sequel were brilliant and should be more aspired to than outright copied and so far, it looks as if this new game is going in a different direction than some fans want. However… it’s not complete and no one has played a final build yet, so I say perhaps wait a bit before you angry gamer types whip out the torches and pitchforks. Eidos’ PR department (or Square Enix’) is going to need to do something clever (or just smart – there’s a difference) to get some of the naysayers on board the Thief train, so I guess I may as well break out the popcorn and watch stuff unfold as that February 2014 release rolls around…

Sniper Elite Nazi Zombie Army 2: Your Next “Horror Movie/FPS” Is Here…

Sure, Activision and Treyarch did the Zombie Nazi thing first as a Call of Duty bonus, but in my opinion, Rebellion is doing it better thanks to the much more realistically violent Sniper Elite V2 engine and its not for the kiddies gore. The first NZA was a nicely nasty surprise (and pretty damn scary when it needed to be) and the just released Sniper Elite Nazi Zombie Army 2 is bringing the pain (wait, can undead even feel pain? Nope? Oops…) in what’s looking like an even better experience. The developer has even gone and posted two live gameplay videos on YouTube (one yesterday and another today) you can check out if this one seems up your alley. Hey, it’s better (and a LOT more interactive) than digging out those musty old VHS copies of Shock Waves and The Keep, right?

Yes, I know Nazi zombies getting filled full of lead (well, actually… that lead is passing through their bodies from what I’ve seen) isn’t for ALL tastes. But the appeal for me is seeing this dev team do such great work on a few fronts and yes, keep the whole “zombies in games” flame alive just a bit longer. It’s so played out that it’s gotten predictable to a fault, but the best zombie games seem to be the ones that go for the expected gore (although a tip of the head goes to the Plants vs. Zombies folks for making the words “cute” and “undead” work perfectly…

SE_NZA2

The Walking Dead Season Two: More of the Same Is A GREAT Thing From Telltale and Skybound…

Telltale Games is going to drive me nuts one day, but that’s probably a good thing. How the heck do they keep knocking it out of the park with these adventure games (a genre some not in the know say is “dead” or “dying”)? Eh, maybe I don’t need to know what voodoo they do out thataway, as the end result is always enjoyable and in the case of The Walking Dead series, scary as hell and completely engrossing. Developer extreme Skybound is going all out to make sure fans of the first game are just as (or even more) thrilled with this follow up and as this teaser trailer shows, a familiar face is back and set for some pretty intense times ahead…

Even better, PC gamers who pre-order the digital download of Season Two NOW get 10% off ($22.49 instead of 24.99) and get a collectors DVD at the end of the season just for the cost of shipping and handling. Very cool, I say. Current-gen console and Mac owners won’t be left out it seems, as the game seems to be headed to PS3, Xbox 360 and Mac as well. Guaranteed hit on anything it lands on, I bet. Commence the waiting period! Back with an update when it hits…

Vampirella Gets Tooned Up For The New Year Thanks To Sideshow Collectibles

Vampi_Tooned_Up 2Growing up reading and collecting those Warren magazines she starred in, I don’t recall ever wanting so say “D’aaawwww!” (ever!) at anything Vampirella did, but THIS figure is so stupidly cute I couldn’t help myself when I clicked on the link in the email I got. Sideshow Collectibles has teamed up with Tracy Mark Lee of Electric Tiki to bring fans of that Girl From Drakulon this lovely 10.5 inch statue in a limited edition of 750 pieces, set for a January 2014 launch.

Naturally, pre-orders are being taken NOW and at $159.99 (with free shipping AND you can pay in installments if you so desire), this one’s geared for the core collector who wants something fun for that shelf, desk or airtight display case. Of course, there will be some fans who turn up their nose at this statue because they want a more SERIOUS Vampi, buy fear not, you elites… Sideshow is going to be taking care of your blood frenzy pretty soon, too.

Onechanbara Z Kagura With NoNoNo! Promos: Sexy Zombie Killers Are OK Any Year…

With all this fuss and bother in the news here about Halloween costumes for ladies getting TOO (and ONLY) sexy this year (yeah, you can buy “sexy” food and other bizarre outfits from any costume shop wanting to make a fast buck), I say the ONLY outfits that should never be criticized are the many sexy zombie killer get-ups worn by the digital dolls in any Onechanbara game. Hell, who’s going to tell a lady in a bikini with two VERY sharp swords she knows how to use that she’s not dressed correctly? That, and these gals have earned their stripes long before this “controversy” kicked into gear. The Onechanbara games have been around for about a decade already and while it’s not a big AAA title, it does have a loyal fan base of male AND female players. Granted, that top video will be seen as intentionally sexist and stupid to some, but it’s not an actual documentary and your sense of humor needs a tune-up if you try and take it too seriously.

I missed posting the second promo video a few weeks back because I’d forgotten to set alerts for D3Publisher’s YouTube page (oops). That’s been rectified and it’s above. Given that the third promo is entirely in English as are some of the game’s menus… my grubby little fingers are indeed crossed tightly (and it’s hard to type this way, mind you!) that D3Publisher of America is perhaps considering a localization of this one at some point. Onechanbara games are pure fluff and bouncy bits, but the over the top gore quotient combined with the ridiculous amount of hours of gameplay, costumes and characters to unlock make them strangely addictive once you get past the jiggle factor. I’ve always found it amusing that nearly all of the males in this series of games are either zombies, other hideous monsters or rescue bait, so in a weird way, this is a sort of Otaku version of “girl power” complete with cosplayers popping up in some places.

Anyway, D3PUS? What’s up with Onechanbara Z Kagura with NoNoNo!? Any plans to bring this sexy slashy thing over to the PS3 sometime soon? I sure hope so, as I’d hate to import another game I won’t have the chance to play otherwise…

Mr. Peabody & Sherman Trailer: Wards of the State, Juvenile Delinquent Version…

 
Urgh. OK, I think I asked this question before, but just WHO is this film targeted to? Us cranky ass oldsters who grew up watching Rocky & Bullwinkle, Fractured Fairy Tales and yes, these two characters are grinding our collective teeth about this CG travesty, the kids of today won’t have a C-L-U-E what the heck this is about other than the usual dumbed down predictable plot that lasts and hour and half and has pop songs packed in and the obligatory fake outtakes in the credits. Parents not in the know about Jay Ward and his creations (and style of humor) will of course, dutifully pack up the tots and trundle in to see this, buy the toys and other merchandise and thing all is peachy keen and as harmless as a stuffed poodle.

Me, I’ll be hitting my head with a hammer and hoping at least one or two critics point out that the Peabody segments were excellent because they worked best as unconnected shorts that were over and done with in a few minutes. Stretching things to feature length and adding needless stuff and worse modern jokes is only bleeding any chance for redemption from this one dry in record time. I didn’t even crack a smile during this trailer and that’s a bad sign because my sense of humor is pretty off the wall and expansive. Hey, I could be totally wrong, people… but it’s not a good sign in this day and age of movie trailers coughing up all the best parts of a movie in that two minutes or so. Hmmm… we shall see, I suppose…

It’s Geralt of Riva’s Birthday! What Did YOU Get Him?

Geralt Birthday

Okay, okay… some you may not have heard of Polish developer CD Projekt RED or their outstanding The Witcher series of games, but those who know what the heck I’m talking about get to ogle that art above and funny infographic below with a nod and a smile.

Witcher Infographic

If you’re not a fan and that info has piqued your curiosity, feel free to do the clicky-clicky thing with your mouse and read on for some press release action on why six years is so important for Geralt and his future (which is looking quite bright indeed)…

And oh, yeah… I go him a nice pair of socks, as I think they weren’t invented back then and it gets COLD in those medieval fantasy winters! Continue reading

BUY THIS! Adventure Time 3DS Gets A Nice Collector’s Edition. You Want That 3DS Now, Don’t You?

Adventure Time 3DS

Look at it. LOOK AT IT! I said! Lovely, isn’t it. Yeah, I thought so. Uhhhh… hey! Where’s that chorus of angels I hired? Oh, crap – they all flew off to buy a box of 3DS XL’s and now I’m broke because angels do NOT work cheap. Crap and blah. Well, so much for the musical portion of this post. Anyway, huzzah! Adventure Time: Explore the Dungeon Because I DON’T KNOW! has gone gold (crowd cheers) and will be… IN. STORES. SOON. Yeah. As far as I know, the PS3, Wii U and Xbox 360 versions get no special treatment and the PC version is on Steam as a digital game so you don’t even get a box (just MAGIC coming through your computery screen!). Yeah!

Anyway, if you’re awake NOW and reading this, thanks for waiting for this very post. Now get the heck to bed so I can go to sleep as well. Keeping me up past midnight, you guys… Now I have pumpkin feet (AGAIN). Pkay, Good to the Night, people… I have a tiger to catch later today or something, growl!

Captain America: The Winter Soldier UK Trailer: Springing Into Next Spring All Over The Place…

Hey, Robert Redford is in this movie. Wait, what? Well… I guess that’s going to be interesting to some people who might not otherwise care, but I guess he needed some company and explosions as stuff after spending all that time alone on a busted boat on the open sea. Well, he’s got plenty of friends in this superhero flick (although it doesn’t look as he’s going to be sporting a fancy cape and boots or driving a sports car off the roof of a high rise here) set to hit theaters in North America on April 4, 2014. I see that this comes out in the UK a week earlier, but I’ll have to look up if this is coming out in Chinese-speaking territories at all and what the date would be. The number 4 isn’t actually a good number there, so I’d imagine both that date and title would get a big change to something more audience friendly. I suggest “U.S. Man, You Owe US A Lot of Debt, Too: Stop Making Such Expensive Movies!” or something shorter, but Marvel won’t like that at all. Not one bit.

And yeah, I can smell the laser-eyed death threats from the crankier and more humorless fans who take these movies far too seriously already. Well, those who didn’t follow that Comic-Con advice about showering before the show each day… Bleargh. Well, I got my soap cannons ready, so come and get it… Just remember to bring your own washcloth and towel.

Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate Gameplay: Out For A Scroll In The City Jail…

Amazingly, some really whiny “fans” are griping that this isn’t the same game as the console versions and that’s it looks like a tablet game or whatever. *Yawn*, I say to those folks, most of whom I gather haven’t played some of those old side-scrolling Batman games from back in the day. Blackgate looks good to me, not every Vita (or 3DS) game is going to be blowing the doors off of the last great one and finally, forming judgments without getting one’s grubby to non-grubby paws on the game makes you a typing monkey with an opinion and not liable to be listened to by developers, publishers or anyone else who you’re trying to soapbox out of a purchase. Now, go slip on a banana peel and get comfortable with those cranky comments elsewhere. I’ve got me some bad guys to catch and henchmen to hurt. Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate comes out to-morrow (10/25) on the PlayStation Vita and Nintendo 3DS.