E3 2013: Konami Pre-Show Event: A Little of This, A Lot of That, Shake Well. BOOM.

Posted on June 6, 2013 by geelw

The most interesting bit out of this is 24 actor Kiefer Sutherland being chosen as the new voice and face of Solid Snake (!) in the upcoming multiplatform release, Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain. That was quite head spinning and amusing enough to make me think it was a gag for a minute or two. But it wasn’t, so I guess this is farewell to the original voice of Snake! Well, I know the David Hayter fan base is livid (and I’m sure Hayter’s recent comments about being in the game will be dissected to really mean he’s playing a different character or not actually in it at all – oops), but I say let’s see what happens.

Amusingly enough… even though the official position is Konami wanted an older, more mature guy to play the now 49-year old Snake, it’s a bit of a bizarre rationale to my ears. For those in the know, Hayter provided the voice of a much older Solid Snake in Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots, so one can only imagine his reaction to this news. Well, he did issue a tweet saying the game would sell about “as well as New Coke!”, so I’m gathering he’s not that pleased with the spiked boot he’s been handed to the butt…

E3 2013: Microsoft, Meet The Real World…

Posted on June 6, 2013 by geelw

So, according to Microsoft, their new Xbox One wonder-box of miracles ABSOLUTELY requires an always online connection, restricts sharing of physical or digital games and does a few other things so terribly wrong for the sake of the “future” that it all means if you live in an area with no, crappy or “borrowed” internet access… you’re screwed.

Actually, you’re not really screwed… you just need to find another console to play your games on. Boo. To paraphrase the original Star Trek’s good Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy: “It’s a console, NOT a cellphone!”

Yeah, well… someone’s going to be in for a big, fat Greek surprise this holiday season and it’s not the consumer who’s decided to move on and spend their money elsewhere. It will be any Microsoft executive expecting a gigantic bonus check for implementing possibly the worst enforced evolution scheme in the relatively brief history of video gaming. Want to hand a used game down to the kids in another home? Good luck with that. Want to lend someone you recently became acquainted with a game you bought and beat a few days back? Nope – they need to be on your Friends List for at LEAST 30 days. Not 29, 20, 14 or 4, folks. 30 or up. There’s a lot more, but it’s all downhill and garbage gibberish that sounds as if it was randomly generated PR nonsense… Continue reading →

?able Humor: Bad Day Rising? Mr. O’Connor Will Set You Straight in 4:08…

Posted on June 6, 2013 by geelw

(thanks, ozabbavo77!)

I remember when I didn’t like musicals much at all, but I’d say that was because I didn’t watch too many of them. I started to fall for them gradually by way of their sneaky as hell way of cracking me up with their precise choreography, offbeat choice of locations or just the sheer number of performers hoofing it up with broad smiles and seemingly not breaking a sweat. I know I nearly fell off a chair laughing the first time I saw Busby Berkeley’s name in a film’s credits because it sounded exactly like the name of someone who’d throw a hundred women and a handful of men into a huge studio and make them dance on a big revolving tower cake staircase a few stories tall until they were doing it in their sleep (and perhaps wanted him a little bit dead for that kind of torture)…

Continue reading →

White House Down Trailer: Here, Forced Dumb.

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

Blech… I just completely do not like these new dopey, expensive action flicks that throw presidents into danger. Yeah, yeah, there have been some well-made ones, but this year’s two blockbusters have just gotten my goat out of its pen and knocking its head into a wall. Well, if anything Roland Emmerich certainly knows about blowing the hell out of well-known real estate. That said, Independence Day was entertaining in a “Yeah, you KNOW that’s not going to ever happen” manner and despite the figurative earth-crushing moments where stuff blows up really good, you could at least walk out of the theater and feel somewhat entertained by what you just saw.

Anyway… this Die Hard meets Air Force One meets domestic terror on steroids stuff is really not necessary, but I guess it’ll have a “happy” ending and a lot of people complaining about it either way. Wait, that’s what I’M doing? Crap. Er, “Free Speech!” “Free Speech!” Now, where did I park that TARDIS? I want to go back and pitch this idea to George Washington and see what he thinks…

Class of Heroes II Out Now – There Goes Your Summer (Part 1)…

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

I was going to start this post with a supremely pompous sounding “From the ashes of Working Designs…” or something like that (I had music picked out, wine, cheese and everything all set, too!), but there’s a darn good chance the the people who want this (and have already paid for it) know that company’s history to the letter (or don’t care because they’re getting a new PSP game) and the ones who don’t know that history (or care at all for JRPGs) aren’t going to give a hoot in hell about the whos and whats of WD. Anyway, thanks to Gaijinworks, MonkeyPaw Games, Acquire and of course, developer Zerodiv for baking this one up. Anyway, that old PSP you’ve got under your socks and underwear in the drawer (and I hope to Hephaestus that those holy garments are clean, eww) is still getting games, so yeah – buy this and watch the hours melt away (but not the pounds if you totally veg out and never see sunlight, silly)…

Play Responsibly – that’s my new sign off for these time crushing epics… at least for the rest of the evening…

Random Film of the Week: Invaders From Mars (1953)

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

Thanks to the need to quickly get out product to audiences rabid for the fantastic, plenty of 1950’s sci-fi and horror movies look as if they were tossed together on a few weekends or less by people more or less making stuff up as they went along. Granted, this led to some true classics of awesomely wretched in-excess (otherwise known as “Z” movie greatness around here), but there were also some surprisingly well-made gems that still pack a punch in terms of story, design and overall impact.

Despite two out of three unconvincing-looking aliens (the third one’s the charm) and a bit too much military stock footage inserted to show loads of troops on the move, Invaders From Mars in squarely in the latter camp thanks to its director and production designer, William Cameron Menzies. The multiple Oscar winner applied his keen eye to the film’s visual style, which presents an alien invasion primarily from the point of view of the young boy who sees a saucer land in the field behind his house. Of course, no one believes him, but as things start to go strange around him, there are a few that finally see the light and fight back against the aliens… Continue reading →

E3 2013: Surprises From DICE? Maybe (If You’re Very Easily Surprised, That Is)…

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

Hmmmm… Let’s see now. As much as I dislike speculation about this sort of stuff (my brain usually has better things to do with its time), I figure I may as well play along for a few minutes and get this out of the way so I can be proven wrong and get back to other, more important issues. I’d guess that we’ll see a big Battlefield 4 reveal, something very Star Wars related (and perhaps exclusive to a certain upcoming console/cable box hybrid), a lot of DLC news and maybe, just maybe something portable gamers may want to get their paws on (maybe). That is all. If I’m right, I’m pleased with this three minute forecasting exercise. If I’m wrong, well… what else is new?

E3 2013: Puppeteer Trailer: Another “Little” Treasure on the PS3…

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

I don’t know about you, fellow ancient gamers out there, but Sony’s upcoming PS3 exclusive, Puppeteer actually reminds me of something that legendary developer Treasure would have done back in the day as a 2D game on a 16 or 32-bit console or a 3D game on a later platform. That’s not a negative, by the way.

The game’s new trailers certainly bring back fond memories of Treasure hits and near-hits such as Gunstar Heroes, Dynamite Headdy, Mischief Makers and a few other classics not named Mario this or that, but with a more modern level of visual polish not found in those older titles.

Even better, it’s coming to retail (yes!) at a very reasonable $39.99, so you get that quality game experience of old (as in a cute platformer that would cost twenty bucks more on a cartridge) with the budget-minded pricing of a company that knows gamers want to spend less on much of what they’re interested in. Sure, I’m betting there’s some “Well, it doesn’t LOOK like a AAA game!” nonsense going on in some heads out there, but if it’s fun, has some decent replay value and gets noticed as a stellar experience by the jaded critics out there, it’s worth more than it’s selling for, I say…

Bethesda Gets You Cultured (Sort of): Welcome to Uppsala, Sweden!

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

While Machine Games toils away on its new game, Wolfenstein: The New Order, Bethesda (and YOU) get a little more cultured in this latest update that actually features no game footage at all (whee!). OK, OK… stop panicking, people. You see soon enough that the game is definitely in good hands (I’ll post a gallery after E3 is over and done). Think of it this way: the lighthearted travelogue and studio tour going on above and below is just fluff to keep your eyes and ears in shape for the upcoming shooter.

In plain English: giving you too much candy now will just ruin your appetite for dinner, you know… that’s your free lesson of the day.

Humble Weekly Sale/Humble Bundle 8: MORE Games To Die For, But Act Fast…

Posted on June 5, 2013 by geelw

OK, I’d almost missed this incredible Humble Weekly Sale thanks to some emails getting eaten by my spam folder, but wow. Some of Telltale Games’ biggest hits, including the critically acclaimed episodic series The Walking Dead, is up for grabs for a stupidly LOW price for the next 20 or so hours. If you love adventure games and great stories well told with a few puzzles thrown at your brain for good measure, you NEED this bundle, period.

Oh, did I mention that Humble Bundle 8 has made over $2 million for charity? I didn’t? Well, I just did a sentence ago, silly. Anyway, THAT one’s on sale for a bit longer (6 days) AND now has eleven games and ten soundtracks for under $6!

Anyway, the clock, she is ticking, no? So stop reading here and go HERE to get what’s coming to you. Or else. “Or else, what?” you say? Or else you’ll be kicking yourself in the pants for not getting these games at a great price AND be stuck reading Fifty Shades of What’s Left in the Freezer again this weekend, silly. Seriously – The Walking Dead alone is THAT good a game that slapping down a measly five bucks or more will net you Steam keys for all five episodes