March 2014 may seem like a long time to wait for Dark Souls II, to pop up at your favorite physical or digital game emporium but it’s actually going to be here faster than you think and you absolutely don’t want to be rusty when you take your first steps into the new dungeons. Meaner, faster, stronger creatures of many varieties await and they’re not planning to let you simply waltz around as if you’re in a petting zoo. If you have a copy of the first game lying around, you may just want to set aside time to replay it just so your fingers and brain are on their toes. Or you can go in to DSII cold and come out a total wreck before you’ve made it through the first map. Your choice, but I say practice makes perfect. Or less prone to death…
They have quite possibly the easiest gig in the gaming business AND they know the game they’re representing is going to blow people away based on the insanely high quality of the work. I’ve been sold on Grand Theft Auto V as soon as I heard it was in development, but these new gallery and very funny Los Santos Visitor’s Guide (aka the game’s official site), the ridiculously packed screenshot gallery and desktop ready wallpapers plus all the other stuff the community is up to means I really don’t need to do much except post something on the game and let you all run out to the store or drop a pre-order in online.
Hey, I’m NOT lazy! Well, not THAT lazy. I’m merely saving up my energy for the inevitable long “vacation” I’ll be taking in Los Santos myself. Playing a new GTA game is very much like stepping off a plane into the biggest and most exceptionally special amusement park ever created. Of course, the best thing is being able to explore at will and do stuff outside the guided tour (i.e, raise all sorts of hell or just poke around for secrets and in-jokes), so I need to be tanned rested and ready because I’m sure not seeing any REAL sunlight for some time. Rockstar is dropping more cool news about the game on Thursday – I’ll be back with a quick post on that (of course)…
Here’s a simple test for those who think different types of media directly affect one’s behavior in every single case. Have the kids (or yourself) watch NOTHING but this classic Humphrey Bear short for an entire month and see if you become a lot less of a litterbug (and really great at doing cartoon dances). If you’re still tossing that fast food wrapper or soda can to the street or not cleaning up after the dog when you walk it, then you can shut up about little Johnny potentially becoming a mass murderer after he plays five seconds of a game rated above his age (which he shouldn’t be doing anyway if you’re a decent enough parental unit).
If, on the other hand, you’re humming that bouncy tune from the cartoon while scooping up trash wherever you go (and being very careful with any matchbooks you find)… well, you can throw every entertainment device in your home into that trash bin as well and go burn ALL of the books in your home while you’re at it. Can’t be TOO picky about where the kid will pick up a violent idea, right?
If you’re like me, you prefer a low stress lifestyle and as little conflict as possible. Of course, here comes Bundle Stars again offering a LOT of conflict for very little money, so how can one not want to slip them a few bucks and partake of some back-alley brawling to let off some Steam? Ah ha ha ha. Anyway, this latest crazy deal offers up ten games for five bucks (slightly adjusted to whatever that is in Pounds, as they’re based in the UK) and it’s a really varied (but conflict heavy) set of titles this time out.
Of course, with my current ridiculously massive backlog, I’m still flipping a coin as to whether or not to commit to MORE games on my hard drive I won’t get to for a while, but as I’ve said before, I won’t stop YOU from buying in and supporting charity. So go get some and think of me when you’re getting into (or running away from) digital danger…
OK, it’s finally here and it’s a really rainy day outside (well, at least it is here, bleh!). So… you know what to do, folks. PROTIP: Play on Easy first. This way, you get to learn the levels and be prepared, as the game gets pretty darn old-school tough on the harder difficulties. That’s not my review, though – that will go up around the weekend. Shutting up now, as I have some piles of gold to collect for my bank vault/swimming pool…
Yeah, and you thought YOU had a hard day at the office. Imagine being the poor guy in the turban trying to turn a trick (heh) with that stupid rabbit foiling you at every turn. Think of this the next time the boos asks you to get out of bed at the crack of dawn to scoot downtown to pick him up those Cronuts he thinks he needs to survive (but will eventually put him into a diabetic coma because he’s eating too many a month). And no, I’ve never had a Cronut – I think people who desire them so are nuts. If they’re THAT good, they should be on sale in more places. Hmmm… I may need to drag my old butt out of bed one pre-bright and sunny one to check this fad out… hell, it’ll make a heck of an article, right?
As an old fogey, I can’t recall a year not going by since 1980 without playing a Pac-Man game. Granted, I’m sure a lot of other people can say that, but it’s pretty incredible that the dot-munching, ghost avoiding/chasing character has held up for over 30 years. Of course, next to the arcade classic, the best ways to play a good game of Pac-Man these days is by hopping online and getting in some quality time with the excellently addictive Pac-Man Championship Edition on the Xbox 360, which is finally getting a content upgrade soon in the form of Pac-Man Championship Edition DX. The original game was an Xbox 360 exclusive, while DX made its Windows 8 debut earlier this year. Pac-fans old and new will LOVE this one for its spin on the classic game, the funky HD neon visuals and the lighting fast pace of the game that’s bound to keep you playing ’til the wee hours…
Yeah, yeah – I haven’t been posting a lot about these final eight episodes because hell, everyone else is and I really have nothing new to add that’s already been discussed. Anyway, if you know me, you also know that I absolutely HATE over-speculation about the stuff I watch and prefer going in cold for these shows (well, except for one spoiler-heavy review of tonight’s episode that really didn’t need to say so much, but I figured I’d read it and see how badly a spoiler-heavy review could be written). As for what happens after this, I’m actually hoping that’s that for BB despite Vince Gilligan wanting to give Bob Odenkirk’s corrupt (but hilarious) lawyer Saul Goodman his own spin-off show at some point in the future.
While I think Odenkirk can indeed carry a show (watching him through the past few seasons has been wonderful and I almost thought his number was up a few times, but he’s always weaseled out of trouble), without Walter White around to add that air of menace, it’s going to be a show about Saul and his other clients which actually might be good if Gilligan and his writing team can keep things in a similar dramatic/comic mix as BB. On the other hand, if it’s just a crazy client a week show or something that feels as if it’s running off fumes from BB’s success on AMC, it’ll fall flat and maybe last a season or two. I guess it also depends on if anyone from BB is still alive at the end of the final episode, as a cameo or first episode surprise in the new show might sweep in other skeptics who feel the same as I do.
Of course, Gilligan IS the Skipper here (and a damn fine one, at that), so whatever he decides, Saul is in good hands (and hell, he’d probably be relieved that his number one client isn’t around to give him fits whenever he calls on the phone or pops into his office unannounced)…
OK, now THIS is my idea of Sunday school: here’s a VERY technical talk from legendary game maker John Carmack at this year’s QuakeCon that’s going to send your brain into a few handstands and back flips out an ear if you’ve a short attention span or just don’t give a hoot about what it takes to get lighting effects in games and how important this is (well, in more modern and future titles). I’d say this is also required viewing for you kids out there who want to show their parents that a career in making games is a GREAT deal more than sitting on one’s butt all day with a controller in hand. If you’re saying out loud something along the lines of “Huh? Light has physics?”, then yup – you need to get learned, so pay attention.
The again, this just may turn off a short stack of the lazier gamers reading and watching this while making their parents all of a sudden start pushing them like mad to get better in school so they can make those new games (and maybe prop them up with some nice retirement money at some point – hey, it’s only fair with the free food and rent you’re getting, right? RIGHT??! Yeah, I thought so.)…
Now I’ve seen everything, but given the past couple of subway rides I’ve had to take over the past few months, perhaps I’m not the only one who needs to be reading this stuff. My nose is refusing to venture outdoors with me half the time because of some of the people we pass by or interact with tend to be a wee bit too ripe. Granted, the ingredients in this particular bar of soap will most likely peel your skin off with repeated usage, but there are smarter alternatives. This one just happened to be in a gift basket my mother received and I ended up with it.
Hey, wait… maybe mom was trying to tell ME something (*sob!*)…
"DESTROY ALL FANBOYS!" 