At some point during your lifespan, you’ve probably (OK, most likely) stayed out late and gotten a bit too full of legal adult beverages to the point that the mere act of walking home becomes a challenging task. As in staying vertical is quite hard because the gravitational pull of concrete doubles per pint consumed. That and/or you just so happened to make the amateur mistake of over-beveraging at a tavern much further than you can stagger and crawl back to that warm bed you left when the sun was happily shining in the sky.

Anyway, at a certain hour when the local transportation system goes from reliable to pumpkin coach with rotted wheels and a dead horse, the night takes a really strange turn. Sure you COULD do the stupid tourist or out of towner thing and take a taxi to your humble abode, but any decent New York tippler KNOWS that’s just MORE money for food and booze the next time you’re out (or that hangover breakfast later that afternoon) you’re throwing away. Besides, that cabbie will circle you to Jersey and through Staten Island (or vice versa) before winding up with the entire contents of your wallet because you’ll be too blasted to know the difference. Or you’ll simply lose your money in that dark cab between the seat cushions when you finally get to your place. Cabbies know this (it’s why they’re always smiling on the weekends, sucker)… Continue reading →