Capsule Reviews 2: A Few More Games? Okay, Let’s Go

Posted on December 31, 2015 by geelw

More bite-sized review bits? Sure, why not?

Onechanbara ZII Chaos (PS4, $49.99) – Budget game developer Tamsoft gets its sexy ladies onto the PS4 in a game that’s going to be loved and hated by gamers for a few reasons. While it has a super smooth 60fps frame rate, the cheesy music rocks somewhat firecely and the action is nearly non-stop (and supremely gory), it’s easy to see the easily ticked off whiny westerners losing their minds over the skimpy costumes and all-out fan service on display. Bikini, schoolgirl outfit and other fantasy femme tropes get trotted out (and that optional Banana Split pack bonus costume is too racy to show here), but the ladies are far from the helpless princess stereotype at all. Aya, Saki and the rest of the crew have been zombie killing for about a decade since their introduction on the PlayStation 2 and later Xbox 360 and Wii Onechanbara titles, so this one’s just their best looking adventure to date. While the game seems a tad on the short side, the reply value comes from unlocking outfits and having at stages again so you can better your score jut like arcade games of old. Then again, every Onechanbara game is pretty much the same: kill plenty of zombies before they kill your gal of choice and have a BIG grin on your face while doing so. Score: B (80%)

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Capsule Reviews 1: Some Games You May Have Missed (Me Yak About)

Posted on December 30, 2015 by geelw

Well, 2015 zipped by too quickly (he typed, knowing that the year isn’t quite over but hey, everyone else seems to be doing year-end articles) and I while didn’t get to write as many reviews as I’d have liked to, I took a ton of notes on things so I could sit down and catch up a some point. The best laid plans of mice and men (and Bemis!) often go wildly astray, so instead of long form full reviews, I’m going to do a bunch of capsule commentary on games, films and books over the next few days just so you have a little something to read when you pop by. Anyway, some quickie game impressions to get started:

Tales of Zestiria (PS4/PS3/PC, $59.99/$49.99 respectively) – Namco’s Tales Studio pulls out all the stops in this latest installment in the long running JRPG franchise (15 Tales to date!) with a game that’s part throwback and homage to the first Tales (of Phantasia) back on the Super Famicom while bringing in an all-new cast, storyline and for the first time, an open world map to explore. Although PS4 owners get the better visual end of the deal on console, the PC version should more than please those fans who pick it up looking for something to play and show off to friends. The game is consistently entertaining from the fast-paced combat to the usual humor found in character interaction and dialog choices. Yes, the use of classic literary references, myth and other tropes is piled on thicker than your mom ever spread mayonnaise, but it works well enough to keep the game fun. I’m actually still playing this one because there’s an extraordinary amount of things to do, stuff to collect and some 93 hours in, I’m close to the endgame but will probably dive in again at some point to revisit a few save files. There are enough divergent paths and interesting encounters (make friends with the Normin you meet!) to keep this one in the play stack for a while. Score: A- (90%)

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Like Freedom, “Free” to Play Isn’t Free At All

Posted on December 28, 2015 by geelw

See that screenshot above? That’s the otherwise fun Fat Princess: Piece of Cake locking up on my poor Vita for the fourth time in the middle of a tough board (Mission 42, to be exact). A big fat BOO to that nonsense. As a free to play game I haven’t yet spent a dime on, it’s not bad at all (random freezes during play aside). On the other hand, as I refuse to buy into the micro-transaction model and complete online connectivity to receive daily rewards the game has been designed around, I’ve hit a huge roadblock in my progress that shows the failings of the F2P model in nearly any game it’s implemented in. If you’ve played the game, you know that it’s around the Happy Hills map (Mission 54, to be more precise) where the game comes to a complete stop for anyone not willing to shell out for additional content or able to connect online for certain random bonus items.

Yeah, yeah. “Everyone “should” have an always online connection these days!”, right? Wrong, and even if thy did, the fact that far too many games, free or not, are linked to this model means there’s less common sense among game developers and publishers who aren’t paying attention to that “small”amount of their potential audience they’re not getting a dime from thank to the shady business model that’s taken over the industry. South Park nailed it perfectly:

(thanks, macyosos8!)

Now, are there any decent “free” to play titles? Yes indeed. I’d recommend Rubicon’s spectacular and completely FREE Combat Monsters in a heartbeat, although the persistent online connection needed makes it not attractive at all if you live in an area with spotty connections or simply don’t want your data tracked. That said, the developer does F2P right because you can indeed play the game for ages and not drop a dime on anything. Stuff that does cost money is priced fairly, makes sense (as in there’s NO pay to win content) and the dev team has polished it all up with a pretty addictive and thrilling game experience.

That said, It seems that the days of buying a retail or online product, registering it and never having to hear a peep ever again about your purchase or have your gaming life poked into are gone for good… but they aren’t. As long as you can grab an older not connected to the internet console or handheld and play games you like without being prodded in the pocket for payment, you’re good to go. Of course, you’ll be missing out on the shiny, shiny draw of somehow spending money on something that was advertised as “free” to play. But that’s one of those things that probably needs to to a high court to decide what the heck that word actually means in this day and age.

The QFX VP-113 Gets It Done With A Retro Touch

Posted on December 24, 2015 by geelw

Thanks to a friend sending me a few PAL format DVD’s earlier this year and my old laptop’s universal media player dying with the old laptop, I needed an inexpensive player of decent quality I could keep next to the console setup that wouldn’t take up a load of room and was a multi-tasker of some sort. While poking around at a few options (there’s a nice Samsung player under $30 that was my initial choice), I stumbled across the QFX VP-113, a budget DVD player that only caught my eye because it not only played DVD, VCD, SVCD, CD, CD-R, and CD-RW formats, it also had a built-in karaoke function, a USB stick reader and much to my surprise, played “games” of some sort. What sort of games, I had zero idea. But the price was right (under $35 where I found it) and my curious collector side was curious about those GAMES. Because, you know that’s what I like (and like writing about). Continue reading →

Blu-Ray Reviews: A Handful of Arrows for the Holidays

Posted on December 20, 2015 by geelw

Ho, and Ho-Ho. It’s been quite a year here, but that’s not why I’m here babbling on my keyboard. You need some more movies to watch, I’m sitting on a stack of them that needed to get written up and this post is my way of attempting to get you to spend some of that disposable income you’re trying to hoard in that mattress. Anyway, I see your quiver is half empty there, Robin Hood. Here are six Arrow Video Blu-Rays of note to nab either direct from MVD Entertainment or your favorite video selling emporium. Lock up the kids for most of these because it’s the birds and the bees plus some bloody good and badness going on below.

Requiescant (MSRP: $39.95): Carlo Lizzani’s 1967 spaghetti western (also known as Kill & Pray) gets a ton of mileage from its religiously-raised orphan turned dead-shot gunfighter (Lou Castel), but it’s also working a political agenda that’s somewhat fitting in this current climate of careless Trumpeting. Kicking off with a massacre of border-bound Mexicans (one of whom survives to become Castel’s priest/gunman), the movie switches gears to a rescue mission that doesn’t go exactly as planned before it drops back into weightier territory.

While mostly bloodless and only slightly comical, the film lets Castel carry the picture despite the presence of director Pier Paolo Pasolini in what’s an extended cameo as a revolutionary leader of sorts. He’s got a memorably manly visage, but Castel’s more innocent good looks and his ways with a firearm are going to keep your eyes on him throughout the film. You can choose from Italian or English versions of the film (both impeccable 2K restorations) with two interviews and a trailer rounding out the special features. Like Arrows other westerns released in the US in the past, this one’s a cult classic that comes highly recommended. Continue reading →

Review: Earth Defense Force 2 – Invaders From Planet Space

Posted on December 18, 2015 by geelw

Platform: PlayStation Vita

Developer: SANDLOT

Publisher: Xseed Games

MSRP: $29.99

# of Players: 1 – 4

ESRB Rating: T (Teen)

Official Site

Score: A- (90%)

As a longtime Earth Defense Force fan (since 2003’s Simple 2000 Series Vol. 31: The Chikyuu Boueigun, or Monster Attack in the UK), finally getting the chance to see the best game in the series finally arrive stateside and in its best incarnation to date is a great thing indeed. Granted, Earth Defense Force 2: Invaders From Planet Space may not convince some skeptics of how much of a must-buy title it is because at first glance it’s going to seem like less of a game than it actually turns out to be. But those of you who know the series who have yet to play this entry will be pleased to know that not only does it deliver the goods, it still holds up today as a stellar (and incredibly lengthy) game that packs in more action for $29.99 than bigger budgeted AAA titles that cost double the price. Continue reading →

HIDEit: Get Your Gear In Order But Good

Posted on December 16, 2015 by geelw

I have to go fishing through my spam folder at least once a month because it sometimes catches email that demands to be read and passed on. Case in point: the one I got from HIDEit Mounts a company that makes a number of really awesome storage solutions for gamers, computer owners or anyone else who has to deal with assorted tech with wires that tend to tangle. I actually laughed out loud as I was reading the email and looking at the photos attached because yes, I suffer from the horrible affliction of owning a ton of consoles (at least 25!) and having all those wires dangling in front of, behind, and to the side of my jury-rigged entertainment center. Yeah, it’s pretty bad, folks. Actually, I only keep six systems around my 32″ HDTV at a time while the rest take naps in assorted storage bins until I need to dig the up for research

As you can see (or can’t see because they’re so well hidden) HIDEit makes simple but highly functional wall mounts for current gaming consoles, small form factor PC’s and Macs, cable boxes and more. They also have controller mounts and even an optional theft deterrent solution in case you want that extra security. If you’ve got sturdy walls and a TV mounted on one or more of them, you’re an easy HIDEit customer in the making.

The great thing is installation won’t take a year of carpentry classes or calling up that creepy-looking “handyman” who slid a misspelled flyer under your door as you were opening it to take out the trash last week. Each mount comes complete with hardware = all you need is a good drill and appropriate bits or a good screwdriver. A level and elbow grease are also beneficial for best results, so some of you scrawny-armed types may need an extra strong arm to shift stuff around. Prices range from $11.99 to $59.99 and I’d bet you a hot nickel that your holiday gift list includes at least ONE person (not including YOU) who needs one or more of these mounts.

Okay, you’re up to speed on the HIDEit front, correct? Good. Me, I could use a bunch of them, but I’m in the process of entirely redoing my game cave so I’m still in the “being in awe because I have a ton of games and systems in such a small space and don’t know where to begin” stage. But now that I see what HIDEit can accomplish, it’s a product on my list of things to get once I get myself in gear to tackle a pretty massive project.

TMNT Half Shell Heroes in: The Elevator Mystery, Solved

Posted on December 12, 2015 by geelw

So, I’m riding down in the elevator here about a week or so ago and to my right are a pair of women of indeterminate age with a boy of about seven or eight years old who just so happened to be wearing a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles t-shirt. By the way, one never guesses how old a lady is because that usually leads to a spike heel to the eardrum or other soft bits. Especially if you get her age right on the first try. But I digress. The women were talking about holiday gifts for their family members and when asked what he wanted, the kid let out a simple “Turtles! I want turtles!”

Now, as some of us adults tend to be fairly one dimensional thinkers when it comes to what people say (specifically what those ankle-nibbling wee people just below waist level or lower say), let’s just say the response the little nipper got was less than positive. In other words, they thought he wanted some actual turtles (which aren’t easy to take care of) and weren’t thinking enough along his interest level (or looking down at his colorful shirt). Moms can be weird sometimes like that, right? Continue reading →

Review: Electronic Super Joy (Wii U)

Posted on December 11, 2015 by geelw

Platform: Wii U

Developer: Michael Todd

Publisher: Michael Todd Games

MSRP: $9.99

# of Players: 1

ESRB Rating: Shut Up & Dance!

Official Site

Score: A (95%)

Prepare to dance a lot and die even more in Michael Todd’s excellent retro platformer, Electronic Super Joy, out now for the Wii U. The game is both a throwback and a keeper, one that will test your skills while making your brain bubble and fingers tingle long after you’ve put down that controller. The game is a pixel-packed near-perfect hard as hell and absolutely hilarious as it hits you on the head with assorted wacky text as you’re trying to concentrate on completing a level. The game works on a pure “shut up and PLAY!” level where the music (by EnV) and simple visual style hook you in and you find yourself learning the basics for a few quick stages before all hell breaks loose. Continue reading →

Agatha Christie – The ABC Murders: Kill Some Time With Poirot in February

Posted on December 10, 2015 by geelw

French game publisher Microïds and developers Artefacts Studio are putting the final touches on what’s looking to be a fine mystery/adventure game, Agatha Christie – The ABC Murders, set for release on PS4, Xbox One, PC and Mac February 4th, 2016 in Europe and February 23 in the U.S. on PS4, Xbox One, PC and Mac. Microïds obviously knows the universal appeal of Christie’s work as the game is going to be dubbed in English and French and subtitled in English, French, German, Italian, Spanish, Brazilian Portuguese, Polish and Russian. As you’ll see below he jump, the development team is really going above and beyond the call to make Mr. Poirot look and play excellently to a wide variety of gamers interested in the character and story (which happens to be one of Christie’s greats)… Continue reading →