GOG.com Gets Slender…Wake Me When It’s Over…

 

Oh, look… another Slender game. OK, this is supposed to be the best… or at least the one from the guy who cooked up this modern campfire tale that seems to primarily scare people younger than I who are still freaked out in the dark or something. Well, gog.com IS also an indie showcase these days as well as a place where you can score much more in the way of DRM-free classics to current PC, Mac and Linux games, so it was only a matter of time before one or more of these Slender games popped up. They do nothing for me and the mythos is a bit dopey. Basically the guy popping up and not quite chasing you in these short scare-fests is Freddy Krueger in a snazzy suit or something. There’s a nice atmosphere going on here and some jump scares galore, if that’s your thing. And then you make a mistake and die. Not my idea of horror, but if that floats your boat – go on ahead.

Game of Thrones Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Not Everyone Missed (Or Was Missed, Ouch)…

In case you missed the last episode, well… you still missed it. This recap is only a minute and a half long and poking you with all sorts of pointy things so you’ll remember next Sunday. of course, having HBO on Demand helps out a lot with playing catch with the assorted residents and denizens of Winterfell as the plot twists and turns like a drunken snake trying to find its way out of someone’s stomach. How did that snake get in there anyway? Oh, you probably don’t want to know, but I’m sure it’s the reason it’s drunk. Anyway, set your Clocky or Tocky and don’t miss a minute of the next episode. Or else I’ll need to come back here and write a really terrible poem or something…

Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut Random Screenshot of the Day: Road Rules (3)…

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Contrary to what today’s screenshot shows, even if you’re driving an official Greenvale patrol car, you probably shouldn’t “Get out of car” as prompted here. As you can see, that car is kind of stopped in a REALLY bad spot and just waiting for an accident to happen. Granted, the traffic in this tiny town isn’t anywhere near the chaos of New York City during rush hour, but I’d bet you a dime that someone will crash into that misplaced prowler on a bicycle or other less than three wheeled ride. Of course, it might be that suspicious local sheriff George Woodman at the wheel with FBI Special Agent Francis York Morgan (just call him York!) in the passenger seat with George about to let York out right above an open manhole. Man, is this guy mean or what? Well, I guess as long as it’s all in fun and no one gets hurt, it’s all good. Right? Hmmm… what’s the number for the hospital again?

DPDC PS3 US EFS 2D RealYou know, you can keep York a bit safer when he rides around Greenvale with George (or without him) once you pick up a copy of Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut, coming exclusively to the PlayStation 3 on April 30, 2013. Featuring updated visuals, PlayStation Move and 3D TV support, new content and more, and YES, those driving controls are supposed to be better too! Just as long as it’s York behind the wheel and not George, things will be just peachy. In fact, you may want to avoid the Sheriff completely for a few days, as I hear he’s been acting a bit weird lately…

swery5But don’t bug Game Director Swery 65 about this. Based on my poking around, some other outlets have been hounding him day and night with questions and even sending out paparazzi to catch him in some sort of compromising situations. Usually, he’s quite a nice guy, but as you can see here, all of these unnecessary attention and hounding has made him a tad cranky. Hell, I know I’d be ticked off if I was taking out my garbage and found seven guys poking through it looking for who knows what. I think I’ll talk to him later about sticking a few rat traps in his garbage can and listening for that snapping sound and cursing when a few fingers get caught. Hey, you’d do it too if that crap was going on…

The Last of Us “Wasteland Beautiful” Behind the Scenes: Art Class Is In Session…

A quick lesson in art direction and how Naughty Dog created the destroyed but stunningly gorgeous game world from their upcoming PS3 exclusive, set to hit retail and PSN on June 14, 2013. As I’ve said previously, Sony’s not leaving this generation with a bunch of shovelware to remember the system by, so fans should be more than pleased the the console is still getting a number of key releases at least for the rest of this year and possibly into 2014.

Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut Random Screenshot of the Day: The Right Profile(r)…

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Say, where did I see this guy?
In Red River?
Or A Place in the Sun?
Maybe the Misfits?
Or From Here to Eternity?…

The Clash, The Right Profile (1979)

monty clift 1It just hit me a few days ago that Francis York Morgan (just call him York!) looks a little like the late film actor Montgomery Clift. Now, I haven’t mentioned this to him just yet, as he’s been out and very busy on this Red Seeds Killer case, but it’s a striking near-resemblance, don’t you think?  Well, OK, the hair is different, but it’s raining in that screenshot. Here’s something tragically hip, though. Just as Monty had a terrible auto accident in 1956 that left scars and forever changed his life, York arrives in Greenvale thanks to a car wreck of his own. He’s unhurt, however… but like this real-life Hollywood actor, he’s got some demons to deal with both inside and out on his strange journey in and around that sleepy little town plagued by a vicious killer. Hmmm. I wonder if there’s a movie being made about this particular incident and who’s going to be cast as the handsome, troubled profiler with an unusual past? I’d bet it would be Monty Clift if times were shifted and he was around today looking like he did in this photograph… “There I go again shaking, but I ain’t got the chills…”

DP_PreorderBefore you get to the debating of the validity of working time travel and how it could affect classic Hollywood stars here, make sure to pre-order a copy of Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut, coming exclusively to the PlayStation 3 on April 30, 2013 from Rising Star Games. Featuring no actual Hollywood stars, but updated HD visuals, PlayStation Move and 3D TV support, over 100 tweaks and changes to the original Xbox 360 game and more, this is bound to go down as one of the modern classics to be long remembered as years roll by.

swery4Hmmm… One of these days I’ll need to ask Game Director Swery 65 about his cinematic influences when creating this game. I know it started life as an homage of sorts to David Lynch’s amazingly weird and wonderful Twin Peaks, but once you play the game, you’ll see other elements pop up. Hmmm… how does the man find the time to watch movies when he’s got all of Greenvale to watch over to make sure only the strange stuff that HAS to happen there happens when it needs to happen?  Oh well – I’ll let him finish that beer before I bug him about this. I don’t want to interrupt anyone enjoying an adult beverage with any silly questions…

Game of Thrones Season 3, Episode 3 Teaser: Things Get Sticky…

Well, talk about a surprise ending to this week’s show. I kind of figured it would be a win or lose sword fight, but nope. Hmmm… I guess I now need to go find some some seat belts for the chair in the living room here, as it looks like things are about to get pretty damn bumpy for a few of the principals in next week’s episode. As I’ve said before, I don’t even get attached to any of these characters too much, as it’s basically the writers rolling their fates and we viewers sitting there getting our strings pulled. This arrangement… it works quite well, doesn’t it? Well, unless they kill off everyone in the last episode due to a meteorite crashing into the planet, that is…

Movies You Didn’t Know You “Needed” A Sequel To (1): Pineapple Express 2

OK, I liked the first one because it was insanely silly and serious in that weird way (sort of like the love child of Scorcese, Apatow and Hal Ashby), but a sequel? Really? Yeesh. Granted, this trailer did make me laugh a little bit, but I’m also getting a Hangover from these serio-comedies that some studios keep feeling the need to give new installments. Sometimes, meeting a certain type of person ONCE in a lifetime is more than enough, I say. Hell, at this rate that In Bruges sequel should be rolling up at a theater near you in oh, about six months or so. By the way, that’s a big in-joke considering how that film ended. Go check it out if you haven’t – it’s absolutely NOT for all tastes, but it’s pretty damned hilarious if you’re an adult with a decent sense of humor who knows every movie isn’t a mirror to actual events…

Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut Random Screenshot of the Day: Sunday’s Cool…

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Sundays at the A&G Diner are usually pretty quiet unless it’s about and hour or so before or after church when everyone holy rolls in to have breakfast, lunch or an early dinner. On those days when the sermons are truly soporific, sometimes you’ll spot a someone in their Sunday best along with a few fancy hats a bit earlier than usual popping in for a Sunday Sundae. And by the way, it’s THIS Sundae and not THAT Sundae (the A&G’s cook isn’t that well-versed in many ethnic cuisines). Granted, some of these dashingly dressed deity-fearing diners have heard some of that practiced polished proselytizing plenty of times in the past. Nevertheless, religious or not, everyone loves a tale well told at the end of the day and yep, they’ll be back to routine next week – just you watch. Of course, heathens of all types are more than welcome to stop in at the A&G any day they want to. Money is after all, non-denominational in its own special way.

DPDC PS3 US EFS 2D RealI’m not sure if FBI Special Agent Francis York Morgan (just call him York) is one of the converted flock, but there’s something really weird about the guy in a strangely spiritual way. I hear he talks to himself in public or something, which isn’t TOO weird (everyone does this at some point, right), but that’s not really my business. If you’re also a happy heathen, you can spend a Sunday with York in Greenvale when you play Rising Star Games’ PlayStation 3 exclusive Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut, headed to stores on April 30, 2013. Updated HD visuals, over 100 improvements from the original version, PlayStation Move and 3D TV support, new content and more, all of which will have you singing this game’s praises to the heavens. Don’t be surprised if you actually see some angels at some point during your time with the game – it may not make sense, but they’re in there…

swery6Oh, when you do stop by the A&G on a slow Sunday, keep an eye peeled for Game Director Swery 65, as he tends to drop in from time to time when he’s close by the town. I think Greenvale has no “blue laws” in place, as you’ll probably spot him having a cold beverage or two that ISN’T a Sundae. Hint, it happens to go REALLY well with more afterward and is even better with a good burger and side of really awesome hot hand-cut fries. Hmm… now I’m REALLY starving all of a sudden. Off to get some dinner that’s not as much of a “guilty” pleasure (but it WILL be a miracle if I can whip it up before Game of Thrones starts up – back in a bit.)..

There’s A Rebellion Afoot: Sniper Elite Series On Sale NOW On Steam!

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So, it seems that you’re not doing anything at the moment (hey, if you’re reading this site, that counts… er, ha ha?) and you KNOW you want to go scope out a bombed-out Berlin in order to take out a bunch of Nazis clinging to their last hope for some kind of magical victory. You also happen to have a decent gaming PC and a Steam account. Therefore, the Allied High Command (or UK developer Rebellion) orders you to click on over to the Steam Store and BUY one, two or ALL of their Sniper Elite series, which just so happens to be on sale for the next… oh, 18 hours or so. This weekend sale (seriously, the clock it TICKING!) gets you access to the original Sniper Elite, Sniper Elite V2 with all its DLC and the mighty gory (well, gorier, as all the games are quite not for the squeamish types) Sniper Elite: Nazi Zombie Army, which is still the award winner for “How can you NOT wonder what this one’s about and/or want to play it immediately upon hearing that title?” for this year (so far).

What, you’re still here? Get going! Those Nazis and Nazi Zombies aren’t going to snipe themselves, you know…

Carrie Remake Trailer: Spoiler Theater Is Actually Just More Deja Vu…

Amusingly enough, this trailer from the upcoming Carrie remake has actually been criticized a bit too harshly for basically spoiling the entire film even more so than most other genre flick trailers. While this may indeed be true, it’s actually just copying the same marketing from the 1976 original, which by the way, WORKED fine in filling seats way back then. Check out both (look up! Look down!) and see what I’m babbling about.

Granted, Brian De Palma’s film was probably a great deal more shocking back then this remake will be seen as when it hits theaters, but we’ll see if the actors in the new film can deliver performances as memorable as those in the original. As always, class… we shall see… we shall see…