White House Down Trailer: Here, Forced Dumb.

Blech… I just completely do not like these new dopey, expensive action flicks that throw presidents into danger. Yeah, yeah, there have been some well-made ones, but this year’s two blockbusters have just gotten my goat out of its pen and knocking its head into a wall. Well, if anything Roland Emmerich certainly knows about blowing the hell out of well-known real estate. That said, Independence Day was entertaining in a “Yeah, you KNOW that’s not going to ever happen” manner and despite the figurative earth-crushing moments where stuff blows up really good, you could at least walk out of the theater and feel somewhat entertained by what you just saw.

Anyway… this Die Hard meets Air Force One meets domestic terror on steroids stuff is really not necessary, but I guess it’ll have a “happy” ending and a lot of people complaining about it either way. Wait, that’s what I’M doing? Crap. Er, “Free Speech!” “Free Speech!” Now, where did I park that TARDIS? I want to go back and pitch this idea to George Washington and see what he thinks…

Random Film of the Week: Invaders From Mars (1953)

 

invaders from marsThanks to the need to quickly get out product to audiences rabid for the fantastic, plenty of 1950’s sci-fi and horror movies look as if they were tossed together on a few weekends or less by people more or less making stuff up as they went along. Granted, this led to some true classics of awesomely wretched in-excess (otherwise known as “Z” movie greatness around here), but there were also some surprisingly well-made gems that still pack a punch in terms of story, design and overall impact.

Despite two out of three unconvincing-looking aliens (the third one’s the charm) and a bit too much military stock footage inserted to show loads of troops on the move, Invaders From Mars in squarely in the latter camp thanks to its director and production designer, William Cameron Menzies. The multiple Oscar winner applied his keen eye to the film’s visual style, which presents an alien invasion primarily from the point of view of the young boy who sees a saucer land in the field behind his house. Of course, no one believes him, but as things start to go strange around him, there are a few that finally see the light and fight back against the aliens… Continue reading

E3 2013: Surprises From DICE? Maybe (If You’re Very Easily Surprised, That Is)…

Hmmmm… Let’s see now. As much as I dislike speculation about this sort of stuff (my brain usually has better things to do with its time), I figure I may as well play along for a few minutes and get this out of the way so I can be proven wrong and get back to other, more important issues. I’d guess that we’ll see a big Battlefield 4 reveal, something very Star Wars related (and perhaps exclusive to a certain upcoming console/cable box hybrid), a lot of DLC news and maybe, just maybe something portable gamers may want to get their paws on (maybe). That is all. If I’m right, I’m pleased with this three minute forecasting exercise. If I’m wrong, well… what else is new?

E3 2013: Puppeteer Trailer: Another “Little” Treasure on the PS3…

Puppeteer TinyI don’t know about you, fellow ancient gamers out there, but Sony’s upcoming PS3 exclusive, Puppeteer actually reminds me of something that legendary developer Treasure would have done back in the day as a 2D game on a 16 or 32-bit console or a 3D game on a later platform. That’s not a negative, by the way.

The game’s new trailers certainly bring back fond memories of Treasure hits and near-hits such as Gunstar Heroes, Dynamite Headdy, Mischief Makers and a few other classics not named Mario this or that, but with a more modern level of visual polish not found in those older titles.

Even better, it’s coming to retail (yes!) at a very reasonable $39.99, so you get that quality game experience of old (as in a cute platformer that would cost twenty bucks more on a cartridge) with the budget-minded pricing of a company that knows gamers want to spend less on much of what they’re interested in. Sure, I’m betting there’s some “Well, it doesn’t LOOK like a AAA game!” nonsense going on in some heads out there, but if it’s fun, has some decent replay value and gets noticed as a stellar experience by the jaded critics out there, it’s worth more than it’s selling for, I say…

Humble Weekly Sale/Humble Bundle 8: MORE Games To Die For, But Act Fast…

OK, I’d almost missed this incredible Humble Weekly Sale thanks to some emails getting eaten by my spam folder, but wow. Some of Telltale Games’ biggest hits, including the critically acclaimed episodic series The Walking Dead, is up for grabs for a stupidly LOW price for the next 20 or so hours. If you love adventure games and great stories well told with a few puzzles thrown at your brain for good measure, you NEED this bundle, period.

Oh, did I mention that Humble Bundle 8 has made over $2 million for charity? I didn’t? Well, I just did a sentence ago, silly. Anyway, THAT one’s on sale for a bit longer (6 days) AND now has eleven games and ten soundtracks for under $6!

Anyway, the clock, she is ticking, no? So stop reading here and go HERE to get what’s coming to you. Or else. “Or else, what?” you say? Or else you’ll be kicking yourself in the pants for not getting these games at a great price AND be stuck reading Fifty Shades of What’s Left in the Freezer again this weekend, silly. Seriously – The Walking Dead alone is THAT good a game that slapping down a measly five bucks or more will net you Steam keys for all five episodes

Bundle Stars 8: 12 Games. 5 Bucks. Any Questions?

Bundle Stars does it again! OK, maybe they’re not all “great” games, but the variety here is important (and impressive). Besides, I’m betting some of you will play all of these and smile like a pet getting it’s tummy rubbed. Hell, at under fifty cents a pop (!), this is yet another ridiculous deal that makes your wallet happy and your brain happier (but maybe not so happy because you’ll be using it to think up excuses to get out of doing important stuff just so you can get some more game time in!). I was going to say something else, but I looked up and the room has cleared out. Blast you, Bundle Stars! Stealing my readers with another sale, grrrrrr…

Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara – Meet The Thief (Your Wallet Will Be Lighter, But You Won’t Mind)

 

D&D ThiefAnother week, another class from Capcom’s upcoming arcade classic set to hit PC, PSN, XBLA and Nintendo’s eShop later this month. As I noted in my hands-on preview last week or thereabouts (hey, it’s close to E3 and I’m up to my newly clipped nose hairs in press releases and such!), the game is coming along fantastically and will be packed to the gills with content and game modes that should make it highly replayable.

Hopefully, this will do well enough that we also see portable versions hit as well as a new sequel or all-new D&D game starring the same characters plus a few more classes for good measure. All that’s up to you (well… partly, as I’m not sure how “easy” it is to get the license for a new game from whomever owns it these days), so make sure you make yourself happy and Capcom happier by snapping this up.

UPDATE! Release dates from Capcom incoming: Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara is due out this June on PSN (NA: 6/18; EU: 6/19), Xbox LIVE (NA: 6/19; EU: 6/19), Wii U e-Shop (TBC – more info coming soon!), and PC (NA: 6/18; EU: 6/18) for $14.99.

E3 2013: South Park: The Stick of Truth Trailer: They Didn’t Kill Kenny!

Nope, THQ’s dying off in slow flames didn’t stop this game from getting snapped up by the highest bidder when the publisher’s assets were sold off, so veteran developer Obsidian Entertainment and new publisher Ubisoft are making sure fans of the TV show will have nothing to worry about. Granted, if you hate South Park, you’re shaking your fist at the screen and screaming “Whyyyyyyy??!!” or something (and if you’re at work or in a public place, you’re just mouthing it so no one gives you a dirty look), but this one looks like it’ll be fun and as pointedly crude as the show.

I’m not a regular viewer myself, but it does make me laugh and cringe at all the proper moments. One thing, though… where the hell is the Wii U version? Ubisoft? Get on that, please. I’ll most likely grab this for the PS3, but I’d say Nintendo’s console could use some more love…

Hump Day With The Ross Sisters: Don’t Get It Twisted, Mister…

I’d forgotten all about the almost forgettable 1944 musical Broadway Rhythm until I was flipping around with the remote looking for something to work to as background noise for a bit of writing and boom, I see that TCM is showing the wonderful documentary That’s Entertainment III, an instant watch just for the old Hollywood history lesson and ton of rejected clips and alternate takes from more great MGM musicals. Anyway, they ran the end of this incredible dance sequence featuring The Ross Sisters (their sole film appearance) and as I watched it, I recalled I’d seen part of this film before, but changed the channel just before the “Solid Potato Salad” number where the gals do their thing.

Ouch, and ouch and ouch – all this clip reminds me of is how I really need to exercise more. Well, not to THAT point of flexibility, though. Hell, I almost broke a hip watching this. Anyway, nope, no special effects or stunt doubles here – just a lot of practice and probably no chemically packed fast food slowing them down one bit. Er, don’t try this at home, folks. Or at least keep an ambulance on speed dial…

Corona’s Humorous “Summer Cooler” Ad Needs a Horror Remake…

Not that I have a twisted sense of humor at the ready or anything (OK, it’s active at all times, folks!), but as soon as I saw this new Corona ad, I started laughing probably for reasons the company hadn’t planned. Yes indeed, I can see some YouTube genius re-editing this one with quick shots of plastic wrapped (and fake) body parts getting tossed into that dented cooler at one point. Yeah, those summer memories can really be fun… until you start remembering TOO much. And nope, it was drinking too much Corona that caused those blackouts and memory loss, either…