Review: Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara

Posted on June 23, 2013 by geelw

Platform: PC (also on PSN/XBLA/Nintendo eShop)

Developer: Iron Galaxy Studios/Capcom

Publisher: Capcom

# of Players: 1 – 4

ESRB Rating: T (Teen)

Score: A- (90%)

It’s really too bad developer Iron Galaxy didn’t make its version of Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara compatible with Windows XP simply because I’d bet a dollar that people still using that older OS would get a hell of a lot more of a kick from this pair of classic Capcom arcade hit than a chunk of more current OS users filling up the Steam forums with all sorts of complaints about everything from the visuals not being worthy of the system requirements to the game not working properly on certain systems or supporting any other peripheral except an official Xbox 360 controller. Us non-picky oldsters who prefer XP because 90+ percent of the games we run ARE old news to you big-riggers out there (long live gog.com!) would be all over this game like white on rice (or brown on rice is you’re into that variety) and even though we only make up less than 8% of Steam users (according to Steam), that’s almost a potential 8% more people buying and possibly NOT bitching about the graphics and having to use one controller type that works perfectly as soon as it’s plugged in. But I digress…

Continue reading →

Review: Remember Me

Posted on June 23, 2013 by geelw

Platform: Xbox 360/PC (also on PS3)

Developer: Dontnod Entertainment

Publisher: Capcom

# of Players: 1

ESRB Rating: M (Mature)

Official Site

Score: B+ (85%)

A stylish and thrilling combination of cinematic elements and action featuring a memorable new character, Remember Me is a grand example of the “shut up and play it!” game. You can be on the sort of clueless “Well, my friend says he heard it’s not like so and so…” side of the fence, or you can step right up, slap your money down and enjoy a well made, always entertaining and somewhat innovative thriller that, while borrowing elements from a few sources, ends up feeling original and refreshing on a few fronts. This is a game that, if you’re in the mood for a good story (save for a slight stumble near the finale) delivers on that promise pretty well. While it may not seem sequel-friendly, the overall experience makes you want to see a second game that features a lot more of the richly detailed 2084 Neo-Paris developer Dontnod Entertainment has created.

Continue reading →

Random Film of the Week(end) – (Summer Edition!): Sunshine

Posted on June 22, 2013 by geelw

Spoiler: Sunshine has a “happy” ending. End spoiler. I had to put that up front because Danny Boyle’s excellent 2007 sci-fi film is a layered downward emotional spiral with some solid performances throughout. The story pretty much sets up the fact that this is going to be terminally gloomy stuff (despite the positive sounding title): the crew of the Icarus II sets out from a suffering Earth to relight a dying Sun with a massive nuclear explosion seven years after the first mission fails. Yeah, that’s not your average blockbuster summer comedy hit storyline, that’s for damn sure…

As Icarus II gets closer to its target, it’s discovered that first Icarus didn’t actually disappear as much as become something of The Old Dark House in space (minus any comedic elements). When the new ship links up with the old in order to snag its bomb and it’s discover what happened to its crew, things get more than a little strange as a few shocking elements come into play…

Continue reading →

E3 2013: Saint’s Row IV Trailer: Bigger Means More What The ****?! For Your Gaming Buck

Posted on June 22, 2013 by geelw

THQ may have gone down in flames last year, but Deep Silver’s acquisition of Volition and their popular Saint’s Row franchise means fans of the increasingly outrageous series have a new game on the way this year that’s even more completely bonkers that the last installment. Don’t take this Hollywood-style trailer too seriously (well, it’s a bit hard to anyway, given the F-Bomb gets dropped twice in it and is seen once onscreen as a character’s nickname), as the open world gameplay, newly super-powered characters and sci-fi elements are only adding to the mayhem the franchise is known for. THAT said, I hope this adding of fantasy elements to the mix means that Volition will FI-NALLY try their hand at making another game in the Summoner series. The first was flawed but interesting and the second was better overall (and had a female lead and some intriguing party members and plot twists), so it would be cool to see something coming on a new console that takes elements from the previous titles and adds a new chapter to things. Hey, that’s what I’d be thinking of as a follow-up, but we’ll probably get a Saint’s Row V instead…

Random Film of the Week(end) – (Summer Edition!): Ball of Fire

Posted on June 22, 2013 by geelw

(thank you, Victor Creed!)

Imagine this as a movie idea today: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs with Snow being an extremely talented exotic dancer type and those dwarfs a bunch of stuffy but eager to learn elderly eggheads she ends up hanging out with to teach them all the things they didn’t know. Once you get your eyeballs above the obvious jiggle-tease material and plentiful opportunities for modern day humor sixteen writers working together come up with, the results would probably be pretty darn terrible.

I can see the trailer now: two minutes, thirty eight or so of slow-mo cleavage shots and some special guest cameo coot rattling off one-liners, plus someone getting hit in the nether regions with a golf, basket or other ball, maybe a nice pratfall, a fart joke, a fat girl joke and some annoying music on that soundtrack that doesn’t even fit. Yeah, that’s not a movie I’d want to see at all. Fortunately, Howard Hawks’ 1941 film Ball of Fire takes the Snow White and thanks to a wonderfully funny and sassy Barbara Stanwyck helping loosen up those old guys (and an even stuffier Gary Cooper), a great script and plenty of screwball humor, it still holds up today as a total riot.

Continue reading →

Late Night Game Week (Final Stage!): Wii, U Get 2 C That Jimmy Still Sux!

Posted on June 22, 2013 by geelw

Ha ha. OK, I had to do that horrid spelling job in the header as a little in-joke even I don’t get and yep, it’s another pre-show title to save time because I just KNOW Jimmy’s going to lose it and fail at another game live on TV. Anyway, saving the Wii U for his final post=E3 Game Week show meant this was either going to be a blowout for Nintendo because more people stayed home to watch OR… a bust because they were all out clubbing or whatever the crazy kids do on a Friday night (har har). Anyway, the 20-Ryu Hadouken/cartridge blowing/toothbrush circle bits was dumb and funny (and all those “World Records” they set WILL be broken over the weekend, I bet). That multiple video games “record” bit was stupidly awesome, though. Jimmy “played” six games all at once for twenty seconds and looked as if he was trying to escape from robbing a vintage game shop and ran into an arcade only to be trapped on a Dance Dance Revolution Supernova machine. Or something like that – just watch the video:

See? Now go break THAT record, Mr. or Ms. Guinness…

Continue reading →

In Japan, There’s A Gatchaman Live Action Movie Being Made. Dance.

Posted on June 21, 2013 by geelw

If you’re of a certain age and did not know this yet (meaning ME), you’re probably a bit too grinny after that minute thirty plus and perhaps either one of these two teaser trailers. Well, we’ll see what it does in Japan and more of what will happen in the near future with a home video release down the road, as it sure won’t be dubbed and show up here anytime soon I bet. How do I know? Well, if I run up to some kid or adult on the street all thrilled at this news and yell GATCHAMAAAAAN! at him or her, there’s a 99.4% chance I spend the weekend in the local lockup until this is all straightened out. Yeah, I went there… even though I have no idea where I went or why I went in the first place. That stuff happens when you lose your thinking cap… Am I out of coffee again? I forget…

Shout Factory Wants You All Howling – I Say Oblige Them.

Posted on June 21, 2013 by geelw

Thank yooooooou, Shout Factory (awoooooooo)! Getting Joe Dante’s classic werewolf flick The Howling back into circulation on DVD and Blu-Ray? Nice. Now I can stop telling folks I run into campfire tales of how awesome (and freakishly LONG) that wonderful Rob Bottin-created transformation sequence was while also rambling on about Pino Donaggio’s excellent score and how the film managed to be at turns scary and silly as well as packed with in-jokes and plenty of references to other films. Huzzah! That and I can stop getting picked up by the fuzz here for setting campfires to lend a scary atmosphere to things whenever someone asks me about the film. Well, and carrying an axe in public, using said axe to chop up the nearest wooden sign for firewood (I don’t go after trees, as we need them around here), scaring little kids by acting out the transformation and a few other minor offenses. Er, um… saaaay, isn’t that some nice *new* cover art on the right up there?

(“Exit, stage left!” Oops, that’s YOUR right. Damn, you Snagglepuss!)

Pacific Rim TV Spot #5: Wind Them Up & Watch Them GO!

Posted on June 21, 2013 by geelw

And by “Them”, I mean YOU out there watching all these Pacific Rim trailers and such and chomping at the bit for July 12 to wash up sooner than it should. Yeah, Warner Bros. Pictures hears you and sees you and is right behind you all the way (which is a bit awkward when you’re trying to use the restroom, um… a little privacy, here?). Anyway, let’s hope those monsters don’t pop up while you’re all in that movie theater on day one, as they’ll most likely be stomping your way and all you’ll have to battle them are a few tubs of greasy movie popcorn and a bucket-sized soda. Then again, all you need to do is mix them together, toss a couple of those dynamite shaped hot dogs in the mix with a plate of nachos, light a match and there goes trouble… and that multiplex, too. Oops…

NEW Earth Defense Force 4 Japanese TV Spot: Bugs, ‘Bots and Beatniks…

Posted on June 21, 2013 by geelw

If figures. As I’m about to drag my weary bones into bed, D3Publisher in Japan drops this crazy TV ad for Earth Defense Force 4 and of course, it’s my duty to drop it in your lap as well before I drop into dreamland. Sorry about it landing in your cereal, though. Next time, keep that bowl on a table, you. Anyway, I’m too pooped to go poke around to see if another site has translated the description text, so you get some free jazz Bing Translation mess to decipher at your peril below the jump. All you need now is a set of bongo drums, a beret, a microphone and perhaps a hot cup of java and you’re all set to read some “beat” lingo that’s baffling, baby!

Er, “Scoodly Oodly, wah, wah, wah?” (+5 XP for getting that slice of near obscurity)…

Enjoy and good night, er morning!

Continue reading →