Lost Planet 3 Monologue Trailer: Talking to Yourself Too Much Will Make You Crazy (About E.D.N. III)…

Posted on July 9, 2013 by geelw

So you like to chat it up when no one’s around – I’ll still hang out with you when your game comes out, Jim. Between the solid losers STILL whining about the game because they think it’s a sequel (it’s a PREQUEL, for the thousandth plus time!) and it’s not like LP2 (which really wasn’t that great a solo experience) or just hating it for being developed in the U.S. of A. and not Japan (hooray for blatant gamer racism? Um, nope). Add in those who haven’t played it who seem to be clairvoyant in their predictions about the game or are even comparing this to games like GTA V (Why? I have no idea.) and you get a game that might have some trouble getting noticed by the hard-headed. Hey, Jim! I got your back, man – and I’ll even though your game comes out in late Summer, I’ll be keeping all the windows open, the fans on full blast AND wearing a hat to keep my ears warm in solidarity as I play LP3. Speaking of hats, Say, Jim? didn’t your grandma warn you about stepping outside without one (or a decent scarf)? You’re going to get ice cubes on your ears!

Grand Theft Auto V Gameplay Trailer: Fall’s Officially A Bust For Productivity In America…

Posted on July 9, 2013 by geelw

It’s always amazing for me to see how Rockstar continues to push the envelope with each new GTA game and Grand Theft Auto V is no exception. September 17 will be a REALLY awful day for productivity across the US and a few other spots this game shows up in, so expect to not see or hear from a lot of folks you probably think aren’t gamers who suddenly disappear for a few days only to pop up for air looking tired as hell but smiling a bit too broadly. For you non-gaming readers, just watch the trailer and let that narrator guide you through why this new GTA is so impressive and important. I don’t play online, but that ending made me grin a bit more at what’s coming in the next trailer. It’s too bad all those time machine plans I see for sale online are trash, or I’d be putting one of those things together just to keep winding time backwards in order to complete the game in a day. As it is now, I’m gathering I’ll be spending a few hundred hours exploring every nook and cranny outside the story mode (as that’s where the game’s bigger secrets will most likely lie)…

Captain America: The Winter Soldier Teaser Poster: That Shield Needs a Few Coats, I Think…

Posted on July 9, 2013 by geelw

“Uh-oh… better get Maaco!” Well, at least it’s rustproof, right? I actually hope that if there’s a soundtrack CD, that’s the image that goes on the disc so it looks as if it’s Cap’s shield spinning REALLY fast. Anyway, the first film was pretty fun, so I’m hoping this sequel keeps the stuff that worked and adds more without being too overblown for the sake of being a pre-summer 2014 blockbuster. I think that Marvel is on a very nice roll these days (mostly), so every good film they get out makes forgetting about the past mistakes easier. That said, some of the not so hot flicks has a few interesting elements, but I’m not sure the world is ready for revisiting those characters just yet…

Monday Madness, Too: Couples Retail Therapy, 1932 Style!

Posted on July 8, 2013 by geelw

(thanks again, Good Old Days Returns!)

Wait, What? “CHECK YOUR HUSBAND??” OK, right! Yeah, you WISH that mall near you or five states away offered this particular service. You’d be dragging that battle-axe out every other day to peruse some shoes just so you could pay a dollar to get tagged, shuffled into the back and woman-handled for a bit while your wifey-poo gets her Blahnik fetish taken care of. And if there’s an artist side of your better half, a trip out for some Secs in the city with a little baggage room squeezin’ on the side? Certeza, porque não? (Você só vai entender essa piada se você falar mal traduzido Português, pela maneira… Obrigado, bing!). I don’t know what film this is from, but I can see this taking off fast in some states where a handful of wealthy fatcats make more than the entire middle class in their area and feel entitled to do endure such treatment on a regular basis. That’s one sure way to make an economy boom – make everyone giddy because those who have the money are making it rain down on those who don’t…

Yeah, right – that trickle down stuff only happens when some drunk bazillionaire “accidentally” pees on his chauffeur who’s trying to extract him from the back seat of that hideous stretch Bentley or has done so, but is trying to keep him away from the koi pond…

MORE Pacific Rim TV Spots: Damn Jaegers Move Too Fast For This Old Man to Catch…

Posted on July 8, 2013 by geelw

Yeesh. Just as I’m typing up another post about how Warner Bros. got the drop on me and ran a “new” Pacific Rim trailer (above) not more than five minutes after I posted the last post about them doing it, they go and drop THREE in a row, meaning they’re using robots themselves to get past my slower than usual defenses.

Hey, I can blame the heat, age, no socks today and the fact that I woke up too damn early (again!) on all that, but WB doesn’t care at all. Their new baby is getting decent notices, all they really want to know is when your ass is going and how many friends you’re bringing with you.

Oh yeah, they also want to know if you’re buying the Blu-Ray/DVD combo pack when it’s released around oh, December or January… Just nod for “Yes”, as there’s currently no selection for “No” at this time. You can stay on the line and a representative will be with you shortly, but I’m gathering it’s going to be a looooooong wait. And hey, how the hell did you get this number anyway?

15 Minutes of Shame: Bad Art and The Tail-Grabbing Tiger (Part One)…

Posted on July 8, 2013 by geelw

(thanks, Media Blasters!)

Every once in a while, I get to thinking that parts of my boring life would make an interesting book, but thankfully, I haven’t done a damn thing about that. Sure, I’ve had adventures in babysitting, silenced a few lambs (hey, they were bugging me!) and maybe even raided a lost ark here and there, but in general, I really have no shocking stories of drug-fueled hotel trashing (well, there’s ONE story, but it wasn’t drugs, wasn’t in a hotel room and guess who had to clean up afterwards AND go to work the next day?), scandalous encounters with ladies of the opposite sex or anything like that. However, I have had some really bizarre jobs that kind of fit what I’m doing here on this blog-o, so hell, I may as well tell this long, dull story before I go and decide to forget the damn thing happened…

That clip above is from a 1968 Spanish horror film called La Marca del Hombre Lobo (Mark of the Wolfman)*, known outside of Spain as Hell’s Creatures: Dracula and the Werewolf, The Nights of Satan and Frankenstein’s Bloody Terror. I believe the latter title was exclusive to the US version of the film and note if you please that it’s the only title that mentions Frankenstein. Unfortunately, there’s not a Frankenstein to be found in the film… at least not in the original version. Apparently, the US producer had some legal issues with a different Frankenstein film he was trying to distribute, but snapped up this import and had an oddball animated sequence added in that combined the Frankenstein and Wolfman myths and brought the world… WOLFSTEIN!

Yeah, it’s about as silly as it sounds (and once again, I’ll need to do a Random Film of the Week on this one, as it’s got some interesting stuff going for it), but that’s not what were here to talk about. Anyway, back in 1981, 3D films were making a comeback and in addition to new movies coming from assorted major and independent studios, plenty of older 3D films were pegged for a second shot at potential box office success. If you’re read that link above, you’ve most likely guessed that a certain monster flick just so happened to have a 3D print floating around that, while not in the best quality, would probably be good enough to cash in on the revived craze for the gimmick before its shelf life expired. Don’t worry – we’re getting to the good stuff, folks. Keep reading…
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Monday Madness: It’s A Jungle Out There! Dancing is Permitted.

Posted on July 8, 2013 by geelw

(thanks GoodOldDaysReturns!)

Yeah, so… how’s that well-chilled cubicle treating you to-day? Same ol’ same ol’, right? Gals yammering away around the water cooler or microwave about their weekend and hair, hair, hair in this humidity, guys doing the same but skipping the hair talk save for sharing man-scaping tips (eww and yikes, that hair can save your life one day!), and yeah, there’s that room-shaking sound again. That’s right, kids – It’s the big boss bellowing out of his cave every so often like a really hungry but even more lazy bear. Yeah, yeah, yeah- that’s a proper classic Monday for you. “Illegitimum non carborundum” and all that stuff. Just don’t start the drinking until AFTER work, chief. Nothing like coming back from that one hangover lunch and still have three or four hours to grind away. OK then – I’ll let you get back to your boulder, Sisyphus -hope you enjoyed the strange sights above…

Pacific Rim “Second Chances” Trailer: Your Countdown Clock May Be Running a Bit Slow…

Posted on July 7, 2013 by geelw

Oops, I forgot to run this trailer yesterday, so here you go. Only a few more days to go before those theater seats get packed in by the drooling mobs of kaiju fanatics and their mental checklists, so expect to see the Internet world even more flooded than usual with Comic Book Guy-like rants and/or raves about what works and what some of these smarty-pantses think was done “wrong” by Del Toro and company in making their summer epic. Pass the oversize grain of salt, puh-leeze! Meh, some people are never happy (and that’s because if they ever got up in the air on a crane to direct a shot, they’d probably poop themselves and pass out from fear of heights.

Rollers of the Realm Pre-Beta Hands-On: Pinball Wizards Whip Up an Instant Classic

Posted on July 7, 2013 by geelw

I can probably tell you the long and boring story of my first pinball machine memories (1972,Gottlieb’s Batter Up, first version, but I also vaguely recall playing Central Park a few years earlier at Coney Island while standing on a rickety wooden crate), but then you’d be fast asleep and drooling in front of your computer instead of up-voting Phantom Compass’ (and friends!) innovative Rollers of the Realm on Steam Greenlight.

The team is working on what’s turning out to be a superb genre-blending mix of old and new ideas that features some excellent pinball action, decent writing and so far, what’s looking to be the makings of an instant hit that absolutely deserves to be on as many platforms as possible. I signed up to get access to a playable version as soon as I heard this was in development, that pre-beta access popped up in my inbox on Friday and after playing the first chapter a few times, I’m definitely recommending anyone even remotely interested in pinball, RPGs and puzzle games to take a nice long look at this one…

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Clean Thoughts: Ivan Tors’ OSI Trilogy Deserves a Second Chance, I Say…

Posted on July 7, 2013 by geelw

I hadn’t even thought about Ivan Tors until a weird dream a few weeks back and again today when I was in the shower and for some reason, images from “gog” popped into my head. More precisely, one of the two robots spinning around with its arms out, damaged yet still quite dangerous. Yeah, I think of oddball stuff in the shower – don’t you? No, not THAT kind of stuff… this is a family show! OK, not ALL the time, but you get the point (jab, jab!)…

Anyway, before you ask a second time (and haven’t yet looked to the left at that poster – it helps to read this site while fully awake most of the time), “gog” was the third film in Tors’ really outstanding Office of Scientific Investigation (OSI) trilogy of “hard” science fiction films:

(thanks, MrMaxHeadroom!)

1953’s The Magnetic Monster and 1954’s Riders to the Stars made up the first two chapters and all three make up one of the most intelligent set of sci-fi flicks of the 1950’s. Tors himself was dedicated to making “realistic” genre films and all three succeed today despite many dated elements. That said, one does need to give films such as this a bit of a “pass” in terms of complaining about their cheesier or not so accurate aspects as they were predating and predicting many things science was still figuring out. I also give them a special hall pass gold star because audiences of the time got three films in two years that didn’t insult their intelligence and probably ended up as interesting for adults as it was for the kids who probably thought this was another raygun and robot quickie.

While I’ll most likely do a separate Random Film of the Week post on all three in the future, I’m going to go on ahead and recommend these (in order, of course!) if you’ve never seen them before. I think those of you with an eye for detail and an ear for good stories well told will get a kick out of this trilogy. Given that remaking them is probably never going to happen (although, it would be amazing to see these as period pieces rather than updated into today’s world), you may as well take these in as they’re meant to be seen and smile at the things that make you think a little more than you’d usually care to in a “B” movie…