So, you’ve survived another Saturday night in Greenvale and your trip to the Swery65 Bar ended without a fight breaking out. Good for you – lesson learned, correct? Still, you drank just enough to have a touch of a hangover, but it’s all good because you know just how and where to get that all taken care of. Shuffle on into your shoes (well, AFTER a shower, shave and some putting on of pants, please) and make like a hungry dog over to the A&G Diner. That coffee will slap you awake while the breakfast special will beat the hell out of that throbbing head stuff and send it flying out an ear or nostril. Make sure you take the normal street route to the diner, though. There may have been another murder last night and you don’t want to be sneaking around the back way as the police and that weird detective are poking around for clues. That and you DEFINITELY wouldn’t want to run into the killer plaguing the town, would you? That’s the worst way to get rid of a hangover I hear because it might rely on you losing your head (which is NOT a good thing the last time I checked)…

Oh, before you go, make sure to pre-order a copy of Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut, coming exclusively to the PlayStation 3 on April 30, 2013. When you finally get back home from your extended vacation in Greenvale, you can relive the excitement and freaky thrills by playing as Detective Francis York Morgan as he investigates the case of the Red Seeds Killer. Updated visuals, all-new content, PlayStation Move and 3D TV support, as well as more cool stuff awaits you and your lucky friends who won’t have to sit through that boring slideshow you originally planned to show when you got back…

Oh yeah, did you know that in addition to some stellar strong coffee and awesome pie (try the apple-pineapple for a REAL treat), the A&G makes a really kick-ass hamburger? All of the ones ON the menu are outstanding, but order the small but absolutely killer Sweryburger (ask for a Number 65) and be prepared to be back for another one when it’s time to think about your dinner plans. The fries are awesome as well – freshly hand cut, thick and tossed in a seasoning mix that makes them oh so yummy.

Hmmm… now I’m hungry as hell – I’ll see you at the A&G!

Well, in Greenvale that can only mean two things, folks. You’re either going to hoof it on down to the Swery65 Bar to get your drinking done and maybe play a few games of darts with the boys. Or you’ll be running home to lock all the doors and windows before crawling under the couch or bed to catch some old movie because there’s a killer on the loose. That, by the way, is NOT why that screenshot above has the bar so empty. Hey, it’s only about 4pm here and no one in Greenvale really gets their drink on until Happy Hour kicks in at around 5! Anyway, make sure to swing by then and see this place start filling up with locals. Some of whom ONLY come in for Happy Hour before running home to lock all the doors and windows before crawling under the couch or bed to catch some old movie because there’s a killer on the loose…

YOU can actually help the citizens of this otherwise strange and sleepy town get back to some sort of normalcy by snapping up a copy of Rising Star Games’ upcoming Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut, exclusively for the PlayStation 3 on April 30, 2013. Featuring updated visuals, optional PlayStation Move and 3D TV support, loads of new content and some truly creepy moments that will have you under the couch or bed, this one’s guaranteed to get you hooked in until you feel like you’re trapped in Greenvale until that case is done. Don’t worry – it’s not as if you’ll be playing yourself and have to muddle around pretending you know what you’re doing. You’ll be hopping into the shoes of Francis York Morgan, the strange but skilled investigator with an imaginary friend and a love for damn good coffee.

And you know what else? Enough of you out there buying the game and telling others about it will definitely make Swery65 (shown deep in thought about what he’d like to drink at the bar when he arrives later) a nice chunk of change so he can maybe redecorate the place to a more modern western theme and perhaps add in a few pinball machines or something. Eh, then again… he’ll probably keep it as it is, as you know how the locals always HATE it when their favorite watering hole goes all upscale and starts attracting the wrong crowd. On the other hand, better a few too many annoying college kids than a creepy killer lurking at a corner table, right?