Vikings vs. The Vikings: My Money’s Still On Kirk & Company…

Posted on March 17, 2013 by geelw

I’m gathering that any actual historian worth his or her salt cellar has stopped watching the “History” Channel some time ago for actual history, but their new “first” scripted (allegedly – not counting the fact that “reality” TV is in fact, constructed of MANY pre-scripted elements) series seems to be drawing some attention in a Game of Thrones/Spartacus sort of manner. It’s actually not a bad show at all, but I do wish it were associated with another network, not one with swamp dudes and other happy and not so happy-go-lucky hillbilly hipsters, hicks and hucksters getting their 15 minutes of fame.

That said, I still prefer Richard Fleischer’s 1958 epic with Kirk Douglas, as the show is based off the real-life story this classic was cut from. Check it out sometime if you haven’t seen it yet, as it’s a pretty great flick that’s stood the test of time and deserves a younger audience appreciating it’s violent charms…

Oh, WTF? Urban Tarzan? REALLY? Your Brain Just Melted, Trust Me.

Posted on March 17, 2013 by geelw

OK kids… “Reality” TV has not only officially run out of lousy ideas (well, it’s been like that for a while), they’ve potentially gone too far for even the normally well-fooled rubes to watch. And if PETA wants to go ape-shit over that cough medicine sucking chimp, I say go for it.

But, whatever. I can’t stop you from wasting your time at all (hey, it’s a free country, right?), but I’m upping my BS call-o-meter to include every channel that runs crap in a bowl like this and expects it to last more than a season. Waste of time and money, I say. Talent? Meh, not so much, but I’d expect some agents and PR people to be strung up within a few weeks…

Game of Thrones Season 3 Trailer 2: Had Enough? I Didn’t Think So…

Posted on March 17, 2013 by geelw

And here we go (again)… more GoT, daily update version (or something like that). I’m not expecting to find out a damn thing about the actual events of the season, but if this trailer does its job as it should, you’ll be camping out in front of your TV even if you have a DVR. I don’t, so I’m old-school and proud of it. Hey, I make a good and loyal audience if the entertainment’s something I get along with. Well, almost. As for animals and small children? Yeah, well… they sure seem to like me more than I do them, so maybe I have a soft side after all… grrrr…

And to prove that, here’s a Season 1 and 2 recap for you new or potential GoT viewers who want to know what all the fuss is about…

Hey, Hollywood! If You REALLY Want to Remake Something…

Posted on March 17, 2013 by geelw

weekend at bernie's remake concept poster Steal this stupid idea from this sketch I drew up last year one late night when I couldn’t sleep. In plain English: take a dumb as shit “comedy” only remembered for its one joke premise and make it into a one-shot (and in NO sequels!) scary as hell horror flick about a few people who do in and bury their boss at his home away from home only to have the body go missing (and the body count rise as things get weirder) or do it up as a funky black comedy with some nice gore effects (practical, please). Think The Trouble With Harry meets Night of the Living Dead as shot by Jacques Tourneur and you’ll sort of get the idea… hopefully.

You’re welcome, by the way..

VGA 101: More Collection Madness, Badly Shot (For Now)…

Posted on March 17, 2013 by geelw

Nope, I’m not QUITE taking today off, folks. I was just catching up on some games I need to review (the results of which you’ll read shortly). Anyway, to keep you “entertained”, I thought I’d grab my crappy camera and quickly zoom through some stuff in the library (which NEEDS a big reorganization and/or a makeover I can’t afford yet, boo!). Er, you may want to take some Dramamine before viewing this, as it’s probably really fuzzy and moving faster than a caterpillar who’s had a pot of strong coffee. Or like a rat. Made out of a LOT of video games. Squeak, squeak! Eek, eek!

Game of Thrones Season 3 Teaser: That Beast on Your Back is the Least of Your Troubles…

Posted on March 16, 2013 by geelw

As predicted, HBO is really rolling out the Game of Thrones promo war-wagon (and probably crushing a few lesser shows’ heads in the process), as we get two teasers in as many days. I expect a few more before the new season kicks off, but none of these will faze me either way. I actually prefer to go into each season cold and allow each episode to wash over me and do what it does best. I’m not one for the stupidity of betting real money in Vegas or wherever on who “lives” and “dies” on this or any show, as hey, I can separate my real life realities from my fake realities in TV shows I like just fine. That and my hard-earned dollars can go towards something a good deal more sensible (like food, for one thing)…

Making of Defiance (7): Amanda & Kenya (And The Places They’ll Take You)…

Posted on March 16, 2013 by geelw

Fans of Showtime’s Dexter and a few other shows she’s been in will recognize Julie Benz from her great work and it looks as if the streak will continue in Defiance. The upcoming syfy series launches eleven days after the PC/PS3/Xbox 360 game tie-in hits, so there will hopefully be enough people playing or hearing about the game to generate a wave of interest in the series. The big fat elephant in the room is quality, but so far, the show and game seem to have it in spades. As always, we shall see… but I say give this one a chance for a season and see where it takes you.

VGA 101: What Do You Get The Guy Who Has Everything? A Bigger Closet And Some Shelves, Perhaps.

Posted on March 16, 2013 by geelw

OK, I have TOO much stuff. Actually, it would look a GREAT deal less cluttered here if I could afford the room/office design I have in my head but not enough in the wallet to even think of. The obvious running joke here is “sell your games so you can afford to get more space!”… which (ha ha) would leave me with money to buy some nice shelves and such but nothing to put on them.

Ah well… I guess it could be worse. I could be keeping rabbits here in the apartment. Or running a mushroom farm from the closets here. Hmmm… that might work for some good cash after all. Where can I find good truffles around here to raise? And a dog that hates expensive fungus?

(Note: pigs are allegedly illegal to keep here in NYC as pets despite some people owning them in a few spots)…

Random Film of the Week(end): Sleeper

Posted on March 16, 2013 by geelw

sleeper If you stripped away the comedic elements and rewrote a few scenes, Woody Allen’s classic 1973 film Sleeper would actually make a pretty solid futuristic drama about a man wakened from a long cryo-sleep who ends up becoming part of a revolution against a totalitarian government. Fortunately, the film never even tries to be that serious and you end up laughing your ass off at its near-flawless writing acting and overall pacing. Granted, the film actually won a Hugo Award for “Best Dramatic Presentation” in 1974 (beating out the deadly serious Soylent Green, the mostly serious Westworld and two so-so fan favorite TV melodramas, Genesis II and The Six Million Dollar Man), so I’d gather there’s a pretty solid futuristic drama underneath all that slapstick after all…

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BioShock Infinite: Some Questions Answered And Mysteries Solved For Your Curiosity…

Posted on March 16, 2013 by geelw

Will BioShock Infinite be as well-received as the original? Will we see so many ads for the game that 2K Games breaks some sort of record for spending on a single title? Will Ken Levine ever give a boring interview? All signs point to “yes” or “no”, as my crystal ball is busted and I’ve been called a False Shepard before. Eh, whatever – I’ll be playing this at some point and know I’m going to enjoy it no matter what the jaded flies on the wall say. As for ken and interviews, well… THIS one at BAFTA certainly isn’t dull at all:

Anyway, March 26 is rolling up REALLY quickly and I’m betting a few people call in dead from work just to spend some quality time buried in the story, characters and gameplay Irrational has cooked up…