Game of Thrones 3:4 Recap/3:5 Preview: Some Ladies Get What They Need (& Other Stories)…

Hoo boy. I actually knew as soon as I saw the creep she was dealing with that Daenerys Targaryen was playing that poor fool with his Unsullied army like the cheap fiddle he was. Still, that was a pretty hot surprise he got at the end. (sings) “Burn, baby burn… Disco Inferno!” *Ahem* Well, he did deserve it after all, what with his insulting language from the get-go. Anyway, there were a few other nice surprises and “What the…” shocks in this last episode and it looks like Episode 5 will keep the ground even bumpier for a few characters.

Hmmm… that big ol’ war map and pieces are back in the next episode, so it looks like some war plans are afoot. Or a really long game of chess (ha, ha). Amusingly enough, a friend I got hooked on the show said to me in an email afterward that “It’s a damn good thing they don’t have guns on that show, or the season would be over really fast!” DUH. I’d rather be shot than roasted by some winged flying beastie, mister. (sings) “There’s a hot time in the old town toniiiigght!” OK, OK, I’ll stop now…

Game of Thrones Interactive Features: What To Do With That Extra Hand? Now You Know…

Heh. That’s a little in-joke there for folks who saw last week’s episode… Anyway, I’m still not into whole “second screen” craze that tablet users have glommed onto as if they’ve suddenly gotten a third or fourth eyeball sprouting from their head and an extra arm (and hand!) that can keep them busy as the onscreen action from the show spools out. That’s nothing but distracting for someone like me who prefers paying attention to the show proper while saving the minutiae for later consumption. It reminds me of going to the movies and sitting next to someone who’s telling their seatmate the plot and pointing things out because that person is too slow to follow or otherwise disinterested. Granted, if one has a child, friend or relative that NEEDS that sort of attention, it’s an ENTIRELY different story. As it is, all this extra work during the show for me makes it less enjoyable because it’s a division of brain labor on my part. Of course, if YOU enjoy that experience, go, you!

In Case You’re Not Watching Game of Thrones, HBO Wants To Make You Do So (NOW)…

Hey you. Yeah, YOU. I know you’re sick and tired of rolling up to the water cooler or coffee machine on a Monday and hearing enough Game of Thrones chatter to make you want to beat the next person you hear rolling a strange name off their tongue with that coffee mug in your hand, but don’t do it. Just give in and either make a new friend with one of those co-workers so you can hang at their place for the next episode or shell out for HBO if it’s part of your cable package you didn’t upgrade. You look like you could use a bit more drama in your life and the good thing is, you don’t have to dress up for it. Unless you REALLY want to. I know that tavern wench outfit in the closet you’ve not worn since that Renaissance fair in 1998 still fits – you’ve been taking care of yourself (and that’s a good thing)…

Game of Thrones Season 3 Episode 3 Inside/Recap: Shake A Hand (If You Can)…

Oh, I had a ton of puns about last nights episode “handy” (oops!), but I decided to not use them at all out of respect. Well, that and I didn’t want hate mail from fans of a certain character who shouldn’t get fan mail at all because he plays a right bastard. Well, a LEFT bastard now after that last episode. OK, I couldn’t resist. Well, next week’s episode WOULD be hi-larious if it didn’t follow up and instead, left us hanging (unlike that hand) for another week while it focused on other events in Winterfell. THAT would rile up the closure freaks (and cauterize freaks, too!) significantly, especially the ones who don’t yet grasp the concept of suspense and how a show with SO many characters and stories to tell can make some things last a bit longer. Then again, given how that first season ended up, I’m betting we’re gotten up to speed about a few conditions, as things were looking grim for another character when that bait & switch move was pulled…

Game of Thrones Season 3 Episode 4 Preview: On The Other Hand…

Yikes… and double yikes. How about that ending to this week’s show, hmmmm? Wow. Let’s give the writers a BIG hand (har har). I totally didn’t expect it, but hey – that’s the good thing about going in cold to each episode, folks. I will get in a big wag of the finger here and say that LAST week’s preview was a total bait and switch job, as it looks as if someone else was going to be in some nasty trouble and not you-know-who. Well, that happens with every TV show, so I guess I can’t complain. Anyway, I’m being more intentionally vague than usual just in case you haven’t seen Episode 3 yet. OK, back to breathing normally…

Three More Game of Thrones-Related Videos (But You Won’t Mind At All, Right?)

I thought not. Still, it’s been pretty amusing to listen to some people who don’t like the show because it’s “too _____ (fill in the blank)” and find out they’ve never read the books or watched more than a single episode or part of an episode before ducking out. Or worse, they always operate in Prudish Mode when it comes to their entertainment options. Color yourself No Fun Blue (it’s that crayon you never use in the big box) and put a sheet over your head, I say. Zzzzzz.

In actuality, I’ve only skimmed through one book a friend lent me before giving it back  because I didn’t want to become completely tied to the printed work like some fans who pick at the show for not following events EXACTLY as written. The Walking Dead also has some fans who get nuts about continuity, but as I’ve said before, in both cases, MORE story is always a good thing. All action all the time (or too much of it in overkill mode) gets mind-numbing fast (see Starz’ Spartacus series for a good example).

Yeah, you’re entitled to an opinion around these parts, but unless you’re running for office, you’re not entitled to letting your brain do less work than it needs to, I say. A little depth and variety goes a long way (and not only in what you watch on TV, either).

Game of Thrones Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Not Everyone Missed (Or Was Missed, Ouch)…

In case you missed the last episode, well… you still missed it. This recap is only a minute and a half long and poking you with all sorts of pointy things so you’ll remember next Sunday. of course, having HBO on Demand helps out a lot with playing catch with the assorted residents and denizens of Winterfell as the plot twists and turns like a drunken snake trying to find its way out of someone’s stomach. How did that snake get in there anyway? Oh, you probably don’t want to know, but I’m sure it’s the reason it’s drunk. Anyway, set your Clocky or Tocky and don’t miss a minute of the next episode. Or else I’ll need to come back here and write a really terrible poem or something…

Game of Thrones Season 3, Episode 3 Teaser: Things Get Sticky…

Well, talk about a surprise ending to this week’s show. I kind of figured it would be a win or lose sword fight, but nope. Hmmm… I guess I now need to go find some some seat belts for the chair in the living room here, as it looks like things are about to get pretty damn bumpy for a few of the principals in next week’s episode. As I’ve said before, I don’t even get attached to any of these characters too much, as it’s basically the writers rolling their fates and we viewers sitting there getting our strings pulled. This arrangement… it works quite well, doesn’t it? Well, unless they kill off everyone in the last episode due to a meteorite crashing into the planet, that is…

HBO’s Behind the Candelabra: Back To Camp Value For A Week In The Woods…

Faux Liberace I think there’s a conspiracy going on at HBO to make me laugh myself to death. And you, too. First we get Al Pacino as Phil Spector (not a terrible film if you care about the subject matter, but those wigs were too much) and now it’s Michael Douglas as Liberace and Matt Damn as his chauffeur and lover Scott Thorson. What, that book Scott wrote fell on some HBO exec’s head when he was cleaning out his closet and he had the bright idea to greenlight this potential train-dreck? Hey, even as a kid I knew Liberace was “different”, but seriously… who cares? Like Paul Lynde, Jim Nabors, Rip Taylor and other gay celebrities I first saw on TV in the late 60’s and into the 70’s and onward, I didn’t see them as anything other than entertainers that seemed a bit more lively and fun to watch than other stars when they popped up on TV. “Circle gets the Square!”, indeed. Meh, Bugs Bunny did the best Liberace impersonation, anyway:

Anyway, this one should be a doozy to catch at least once provided Douglas isn’t so much of an egomaniac that we need to see his bare ass again in a movie (Basic Instinct flashback starts up… Yaaah!). If that happens, I’m also going to have a Saturn 3 flashback (if you want to see Mike’s dad, Kirk Douglas’ ass in a REALLY bad flick, go track that bomb down). Well, as with that Spector flick, it might be good when all is said and done, but you have to wonder who the audience is for this one (other than “reality” TV obsessed fanatics of any gender and pretend vampires looking for dated fashion tips, ha ha)…

Game of Thrones Season 3 Recap (1): Lessons Learned On A Few Fronts…

Among other things, let’s see now:

  • Lannisters always pay their debts (unless they’re to other Lannisters)
  • You CAN survive a green magic hellfire explosion if you land on some big rock in the sea that saves your life (ouch.)
  • Mothers DO make mistakes that make for nice plot kicks in the ass
  • Undead-looking armies seem to be REALLY bad at killing slow, fat guys.
  • The new people you meet are the same as the old people you meet… just newer
  • And most importantly, “Men don’t need nipples” (ouch!)

Episode 2 is Sunday. If you don’t have HBO yet, you’re welcome (sorry for the spoilers, thought)…