Random Films: Robo Vampire Makes My Monday More Tolerable…

Posted on January 5, 2015 by geelw

Well, the plasterer is at lunch for an hour (yes, he left before noon!), so there’s a pause in today’s nightmare. In the meantime, after taking some more pinup photos of the wreckage in the kitchen, to keep my sanity level somewhere close to normal I’ve been catching up on some bad movies. Godfrey Ho’s 1988 howler Robo Vampire made my morning thanks to it being even worse (and much funnier) than its title suggests. Swiping badly from Paul Verhoeven’s stellar Robocop is bad enough to dismiss this without even watching it. But toss in hopping ghosts (wait, how does a cyborg fight ghosts outside of some seven-year old kid’s notebook scribbles?), mercenaries, long water torture scenes and slow, dull “chases” and editing that makes the film seem like three or four movies spliced together and you get an instant classic. Well, “classic” in that “How the hell did this ever get made?” manner. Seriously. I’ve seen student films with better quality EVERYTHING than this clunker.

Ah well. Everything exists for a reason, I suppose. This crazy flick just kept me laughing through the continuing (and seemingly never ending) mess that is my apartment. I suppose I should thank Mill Creek Entertainment somewhere in all this because I’m too lazy and busy to seek out and download all those public domain flicks I paid ten bucks for and still consider that a steal because that’s time and bandwidth money I didn’t need to waste. Back in a bit…

Kitchen Nightmares, Part Whatever: Everything AND The Kitchen Sink?

Posted on January 5, 2015 by geelw

Wait, what? Hold on a minute. When last we left the nightmare, the inspector was here and mumbled something at the end of a long bit of other information about the ancient, sturdy and fairly indestructible sink (that’s been in the apartment since the complex was built back in 1939-40) needing to “come out.” My eyebrow went up, but nothing further was said about it and no one from the office called and told us to be prepared to maybe move stuff from the drawers and cabinet next to the sink, as it’s a big deal removal job. Guess what happened this morning?

Yep, a bunch of guys roll in here (as in everyone that SHOULD have in the first place), and some start banging away at the old wooden counter top next to the sink and another guy gets under that sink and start in on the pipes. Of course, I’m happy to see people working in that kitchen who seem to know what they’re doing. However… it would have been nice to know I should have l should have moved everything that’s not covered in plaster dust, tiny bits of wood, well-aged insect egg sacs and who knows what else. Wonderful, and unless there’s a new sink in and working by the end of the day, stuff will need to get gently dumped into the bathtub to be cleaned.

Oh, and what’s this? They decided to remove the wooden counter ACROSS from the sink for some reason? Great. Now all my tableware and whatever else is in the cabinet below are covered in that crap as well. Which is doubly annoying because I cleaned out those drawers and washed everything about two or so weeks back. Yeah, it’s going to be a looooooong day, ladies and gents. On one hand, I shouldn’t be mad at all this because it’s all getting done. But the whole not being told what’s being done until it’s happening with no time to move stuff is kind of a pain in the ass.

Well, so much for a two day job. That and the place still needs a paint job. And the leak in the pipe in the back is back. And the bathroom needs to be done now that they’ve finally noticed the cracks in the wall that have been pointed out to them last year have gotten a bit longer. And so forth, and so on… Gyaaaaah.

Sunday’s Cool: It’s A Damn Fine Day For Cleaning…

Posted on January 4, 2015 by geelw

Good Homekeeping Tip #12: Yeah, you should kind of vacuum those rugs more often, people. If not, they tend to spring to life and wreak havoc amongst the citizenry. No important posts today, thanks to me getting some stuff ready for tomorrow’s return of the kitchen killers (aka: the “plasterers”) and my deciding to pretty much veg out and watch too damn many bad movies today thanks to the crappy weather. I sometimes do the rugs here twice a week, by the way. That’s due to a lot of traffic in and out of here more than an OCD or anything. Alrighty – I’ll be back tomorrow in a more productive mood. Or at least I better be, ha and ha-ha…

WATCH THIS: Nothing Lasts Forever… Unless It’s on TCM!

Posted on January 3, 2015 by geelw

Finally, one of the bucket list 80’s film for many folks my age is coming to TV legally and I couldn’t be happier. Well, I actually COULD be happier if TCM was showing Nothing Lasts Forever at a more sane hour. For a big premiere of a film many have desired seeing on the big screen, that 2am (EST) start time just made me say, “really?” out loud when I found out. Which was funny because I was at the library and when I said that, two guys who were talking next to me thought I was referring to the conversation they were having that I didn’t hear. Oops.

Okay, not that I’m not a complete night owl at times (all my candles have wicks on either end), but come on now. Still, this bodes well if the damn film also nets a DVD/Blu-Ray release at some point in the near future. Or at the very least, more and earlier showings on TCM. Here’s a fan-made trailer from a few years back just to pique your interest in case you’re wondering what I’m gushing about:

(thanks, mpjstreeter!)

I’m not sure if they track their ratings as obsessively as network stations do, but I’m betting a lot of people will be staying up later than usual to catch this. The other upside to all this is if you still happen to be awake and giddy afterwards, you can sit through John Carpenter’s 1981 classic, Escape From New York, which amusingly enough fits the theme of the previous film, albeit in a more comically violent manner. Anyway, I’ll put on some coffee as soon as I walk in the door, maybe do a few push-ups and jump into the shower to keep awake. I was up late into the morning today (see my previous post) and had forgotten the film was on later today, er, tomorrow morning. Fear not, dear readers – I’ll be awake to see it in its entirety. My Sunday may either be spent half asleep for the better part of the morning or wishing I could see the movie again because I missed something.

MGM had better come through with a home video release at some point. I’m betting a lot of people will be replacing bootlegs with a better version that will hopefully have some decent special features.

The Invasion Has Begun (Finally!)…

Posted on January 3, 2015 by geelw

Yeah, yeah. Some of you have this budget-priced collection of mostly crappy sci-fi/fantasy flicks with a few old TV shows no one over a certain age knows about already. But I’m late to the party and loving it, warts and all. I’ll probably drop in a few Random Film of the Week posts on some of these flicks at some point. I spent too much of last night and early this morning scanning through some of the fifty films spread across a dozen discs mostly laughing my head off or having my eyes pop out of my head at some of the wilder films. I’d actually seen some of them long ago on TV but forgot all about them, so being reminded that they existed was probably the most amusing thing.

That said, it’s too bad the video formatting and picture quality is all over the map in this set. The best-looking films are some of the made for TV stuff or the older black and white films and TV shows that were made to fit screens of a certain size. Some of the theatrical features suffer with the sides if images chopped off and/or too grainy/too dark transfers that make them hard to sit through. Still, a few of the gems I’ve wanted to see again are here, so R.O.T.O.R. is going to crack me up all over again and probably be close to the top of the list as a review. or perhaps I’ll do Slipstream, a really offbeat sci-fi flick with Mark Hamill and Bill Paxton I’d only heard and read about but never saw until last night. We’ll see, however. I only made it through two full movies and seven discs worth of watching assorted clips before I keeled over. The entire set is 70 hours, 34 minutes and I’ll probably watch every second. Even those awful Rocky Jones, Space Ranger shows from the 50’s will get a look-see from me. Hey, I have to know what my folks were watching back in the day, right?

Well, at least I won’t be whining about having nothing to watch for a while, right?