30 | March | 2017 | "DESTROY ALL FANBOYS!"

Okay… it’s confession time, again. CLOWNS DO NOT SCARE ME. At all. There, I said it. Hey, I grew up going to circuses on class trips (the animal waste smell was worse than the greasepaint talent, folks), watching Bozo the freakin’ Clown on TV, so clowns make me laugh. Even Killer Klowns From Outer Space. Okay, serial killers in real life who’ve dressed as clowns? Yeah, but that’s different. Hell, I’ve even painted an evil clown for a magazine cover back in the day and my sleep has been secure. Well, up to the point a bunch of orange clowns slipped into seats of power with plans to turn the rivers and skies blacker than the unclean resources they claim are otherwise. But, I digress. I do like the look of this from the trailer, haven’t reread the book in over 15 years or longer and thought Tim Curry looked great as Pennywise because his makeup gave him a light bulb shaped noggin that reminded me of Greedy Killerwatt. Yes, I am as old as dirt.

Anyway, we’ll soon see how Pennywise it was to remake this Stephen King classic, but as he’s given it his blessing, it certainly looks to be some sort of more definitive version than that old TV movie was. I predict a huge horror hit because humans are scared of the strangest stuff that’s not at all real while strangely doing scary stuff to each other straight out of a horror flick on a daily basis. Go figure.

-GW

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So, how are you doing, dear readers? Good? Good. Me? Meh, I’m doing okay. Anyway, I missed the first trailer to Spider-Man: Homecoming a few months back, so it’s above and the newer trailer that dropped yesterday is below. The big legal issues keeping Spidey out of Marvel’s bigger cinematic universe seem to be ironed out (at least for the foreseeable future), so say hello a second time to Tom Holland, whose portrayal of the character in Captain America: Civil War helped give that film some much-needed levity. Speaking of levity, how’s the kind of in-joke of Michael Keaton going from playing Birdman to another bird-man get you? I don’t think Oscar will come calling again for a superhero flick (despite what Logan has done in terms of critical response and yeah, yeah, Suicide Squad winning its hair/makeup award), but it’s also just fine by me that this reboot isn’t looking as cheesy as the last few attempts at making him a big deal were.

That said, my rules of engagement still apply: Unless I get invited to a premiere here in NYC, I’m holding out for the Blu-Ray version for those bonus features and any extended footage chopped out of the theatrical cut. I don’t think Marvel is quite as nefarious as DC in terms of this stuff, but I’m admittedly a few films behind in both cinematic universes.