Random Film of the Week: Lizzie

Posted on December 16, 2013 by geelw

Released in the same year The Three Faces of Eve, 1957’s Lizzie covers the same thematic ground, albeit in a bit more unintentionally campy manner. Eleanor Parker plays Elizabeth and well as Beth and Lizzie, her two other personalities in this attempt at the “message” film sub-genre that Hollywood seemed to thrive on back then as writers and directors made more and more films with socially conscious and provocative subjects.

Although based on the novel The Bird’s Nest by Shirley Jackson and ably directed by Hugo Hass (who also has a small part in the film), compared to Eve and Joanne Woodward’s more realistic (and Oscar-winning) performance it’s far from a perfect film, especially when viewed today. For me, it’s the same thing with Otto Preminger’s classic The Man With the Golden Arm where the bulk of its otherwise deadly serious subject matter can be mined for comic gold because of some pointed overkill that may have been “shocking” in the 1950’s, but awesomely funny today. Parker’s role in that film was also well acted, but as her Zosh made me chuckle and cringe there, Lizzie here gets me grinning every time she takes over poor Elizabeth and starts gnawing on the scenery (and some poor man) to great effect… Continue reading →

Fake Time Travel Takes a Big Step Backwards, But Nice Try, Flyonix!

Posted on December 16, 2013 by geelw

Well, I figured SOMEONE would try and make a life sized TARDIS that actually flew one of these days, but the guys at Flyonix did so and made a trio of really fun and funny professional quality videos documenting their process and the initial (and unfortunately first and only) flight of their blue boxy bird. As you can see, things didn’t exactly turn out as well as some of you would like. Well, at least they weren’t crazy enough to put a person inside, right? Of course, you Who purists might be a bit miffed that this version of the TARDIS wasn’t bigger on the inside and all that, but hey – you can only go SO far with actual reality, you know….

Of course, this probably won’t stop them from making a new attempt and yep, I want them to at LEAST get one up, flying and landing safely just so I can like to see an actual TARDIS ride pop up in an amusement park somewhere in the world. Heck, you’d think it would have happened already, but I guess since Disney or Universal hasn’t bought Doctor Who yet (and we certainly don’t want to see THAT happening, correct?) and slapped a themed section into one of their parks, it won’t be a “thing” to experience outside of some fan fiction (eek) or inventors with too much time on their hands and plenty of moxie. Wait… did I just use “moxie” in an sentence in the 21st century? Yes, I did. Time travel DOES exist!

Proof I’m Not A (Completely) Cranky Bastard: Doki Doki Universe Is Awesome.

Posted on December 16, 2013 by geelw

What, ME Worry? Not really, robot – it’s just a Monday thing, that’s all. So, HumaNature Studios new PS3/PS4/Vita game, Doki Doki Universe is actually really fun and interesting and like the gloriously inventive Tearaway, one of the better indie titles on Sony’s assorted platforms. I’ve only played the wonderful (and lengthy) demo so far, but a few friends who’ve been enjoying the full version are bugging me to get the full game. Yeah, yeah – I will once I chop down my backlog significantly.

The GREAT thing about buying this one outright it is any version you buy gets you a game that will run on the PS3, PS4, and Vita. If you’re one of those overly social butterflies, guess what? The Doki Doki Universe Mail feature can even be used on some mobile devices, meaning you can facebook like a champ using some kooky hand-drawn characters and a custom page on your console, phone or tablet. I hate the fake word “phablet” so I won’t use it in a sentence, although I just did there. Oops. OK, I’ll NEVER use that word in another sentence from now on. Better? Thanks you. Now stop reading this post and go check out this game, I say…

Not So Random Film of the Week: The Lovely Bones

Posted on December 16, 2013 by geelw

Hey, kids! Happy Christmas (or whatever you celebrate) and all that rot! I had to open one of my presents early in order to tell you what my brain and eyeballs say about it, so here you go. This post is my little contribution to The Cinematic Katzenjammer’s Not-So-Secret Santa Review Swap. It’s definitely not a holiday flick (nor a joyous one), but you never know what you’ll get from Saint Nick when he drops something down your chimney. You just need to review it and hope you do a good job at it… OR ELSE. Anyway, grab some eggnog, pull up a comfy chair, put the pet of choice on your lap and read on!

I have a particular problem with most ghost stories in film thanks to zero continuity or lineage in the mythos from one tale to another across the globe. Yes, I’ve seen dozens of great films from mildly spooky to downright scare me under the furniture freaky in over 46 years of watching movies, but their level of effectiveness is more due to great writing and acting than these tales making any sort of logical sense from one to another. That said, after watching it twice, I can very safely say that The Lovely Bones is a beautiful looking, wonderfully shot and mostly terrifically acted movie that for me, was manipulative, frustrating and not at all satisfying to watch.

Even Brian Eno swiping his own music from tracks on Here Come The Warm Jets (one of my favorite albums) and adding them to his often ethereal score can’t save this film from its weaknesses. Then again, maybe it’s me being cranky here? After all, Peter Jackson and I have some unspoken grief beef ever since 1996’s The Frighteners made me want to strangle myself in my sleep after I saw it and the overkill of way too many CG effects and too much trying to be too funny and too serious simultaneously beat a whole theater of paying saps into a blue-green hued coma. That said, this 2009 film makes that old one look a lot more palatable and enjoyable in comparison… Continue reading →

Random Film of the Week(end): The Stunt Man

Posted on December 15, 2013 by geelw

It’s been a really sad year for film fans in terms of losing bits of history and memory as the months fly by too soon. Upon hearing that Peter O’Toole passed away, the first thing I thought of was that TCM is really going to need to update its TCM Remembers video to include the legendary actor (and perhaps Paul Walker, as he wasn’t included {not being a “classic” film actor and all} although Eleanor Parker, who died later, was).

The second thing I thought of was not the film he’s probably going to be most remembered for by many, David Lean’s masterful epic Lawrence of Arabia, but Richard Rush’s bawdy, bold 1980 film, The Stunt Man with the actor playing a madman of a director trying to make a bizarre World War I film with an on the lam drifter replacing the stunt man killed in a freak accident… Continue reading →

I Still Need A Vacation, But The Store Needs Minding…

Posted on December 15, 2013 by geelw

Bleh. While it’s not as bad as it’s been in previous years, I’m gathering that the usual winter blahs that creep into my generally crowded head starting around November will be packing some extra fierce cold and wind action. I’m a firm believer that everyone gets gloomy about something at some time during the year or their lifetime and the best thing to do isn’t to suck down a handful of prescribed happy pills that end up making you worse through assorted side effects straight out of a 70’s horror film, but to ride it out and find something constructive to do to keep those neurons busy being creative.

Thankfully, that’s NOT a problem here at all, as I actually have too much to do and not enough time to do it all, a helper non-monkey that’s going to be contributing stuff he likes here in a bit and a few other irons in the fire I can’t talk about just yet because I’m still juggling ideas around. That means I don’t sleep much some days, but it’s all good. I was going to write something about my current annoyance at social networking, FiOS ending people around to ring doorbells on a weekend, making soup on a whim, and that ONE person who doesn’t get a joke that pretty obvious yet so meta that you’d need to be an overreacting idiot to not see it’s not serious at all. However,dear reader… that stuff takes deeper thought than I have on a stupidly cold Sunday where it snowed earlier and rained later (boo, slushies for EVERYBODY!!!)… Meh, I’ll be back later tonight or tomorrow… I’ve got some content to generate…

Interstellar Teaser Trailer: What You Do After You’ve Gone Batty Thrice…

Posted on December 14, 2013 by geelw

So, it’s about a year away (!), but Christopher Nolan’s upcoming Interstellar looks as if it will be one more intensely interesting film from one of the more prolifically creative mainstream directors working today. Granted, this SUPER tease may as well be a trailer for a Salvage One movie or a more serious version of Joe Dante’s EXPLORERS, but I like that vagueness going on here and the fact that we have to wait a whole year to see what’s coming. Naturally, there WILL be updates as more of the plot and cast are revealed, but with any new film, I prefer to stay the hell off the internet and far away from speculation and spoilers because it just makes for a better overall viewing experience. Try it sometime and see, I say…

Review: Adventure Time: Explore The Dungeon Because I DON’T KNOW!

Posted on December 14, 2013 by geelw

Platform: Nintendo Wii U/Nintendo 3DS (also on PS3/Xbox 360/PC)

Developer: WayForward Technologies

Publisher: D3Publisher of America

# of Players: 1-4

ESRB Rating: E10+ (Everyone 10+)

Official Site

Score: B (80%)

You don’t need to be a big Adventure Time fan at all to enjoy Adventure Time: Explore The Dungeon Because I DON’T KNOW!, but it may help out considerably if you’re a fan of ancient dungeon crawlers, intentional use of 8-bit visuals and a certain classic four-player arcade dungeon crawler. Insanely busy developer WayForward Technologies has managed to capture all of those elements in this game, and while it’s a pretty straightforward experience, as a long time fan of anything dungeon related (er, don’t get any “whip-smart” thoughts in your noggins, people!), this one’s a fine bit of nostalgia that’s even more fun with a few friends along for the long haul. Going in solo is also enjoyable if you’re that old school (raises hand high!), but if you want to rack up more loot and enough money for gear and skill upgrades, you’ll need to pick your hero or heroine wisely. Survival can be pretty tough in the later maps when you’re alone and not able to get to those out of reach goodies… Continue reading →

Random Film of the Week: Friday the 13th

Posted on December 13, 2013 by geelw

Amusingly enough, I wasn’t planning on doing a RFotW at all (well, for a few days at least) until I was walking home and realized that it was indeed that day where superstitious people go out of their ways to avoid danger and paradoxically set themselves and others up for accidents. If you’ve ever spilled a hot or cold beverage on yourself or someone else or the ground because some idiot was jumping out of the way of a black cat, diving past a ladder, threw a handful salt over their shoulder into your eyes or anything else deemed to ward off bad luck, you probably know what I mean, correct?

Anyway, taking its cues from !950’s “B” horror and Italian giallo films and adding a few (for the time) modern twists Sean S. Cunningham’s 1980 horror flick is to many, a classic. Granted, back when it was released it was labeled as “misogynistic” (despite a girl being the last survivor and a plot twist I won’t spoil here for those who still haven’t seen this one) along with a bunch of other genre films that put BOTH male and female characters in peril and if you want to see it as such, I’m not going to change your mind. However, when you take into account the guys get it as badly as the gals here, I’d say the film is shocking because it actually doesn’t discriminate when it comes to who gets the axe, arrow, machete or other modes of mean-spirited dispatching… Continue reading →

STL Ocarina Reminds You That Tauriel Is a LOT Cooler Than Zamfir Will EVER Be…

Posted on December 13, 2013 by geelw

So, The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug opens in theaters today and yes indeed, STL Ocarina wants to get you in the mood for the film with a lovely little tune played by an actual elf. Okay, so it’s NOT an elf, actually… but hey, that video and tune make you BELIEVE there are and that’s all that counts, correct? And yes, you can still snap up that 6 Hole Lord of the Rings Ocarina you’ve been eyeballing. Did you know that people who play any type of musical instrument over time tend to be sharper when it comes to picking up on mistakes? Well, there’s a University of St. Andrews study that says it’s all due to learning how to play an instrument and sticking with it. Who says you can’t learn anything new these days? Now go get yourself or someone else a nice playable gift this year!