Now Playing: Resident Evil Revelations – Jill Valentine’s In Ship Shape, That’s For Sure…

Posted on May 21, 2013 by geelw

I got a review copy of Resident Evil Revelations on Friday evening, but just got around to firing it up on Sunday night thanks to me needing to get my Deadly Premonition: The Director’s Cut review up and some other stuff. Anyway, so far, so good – Capcom has done a great job with this (DO NOT call it a simple “port”, as that cheapens the effort that went into this game) and it’s really fun to play, as they kept the short maps from the 3DS game, meaning you can dive in for 15 to 30 or so minute chunks, hop out to do something else and come back to the game without having to figure out where you left off. OK, shutting up and going back home to play more – expect a review later in the week…

Orc Attack Gets Slightly Retitled (In Fact, It’s A Gas)…

Posted on May 20, 2013 by geelw

OrcAttack_BoxArt This actually cracks me up more than a little because I remember the Sega Genesis and Super Nintendo Game from Interplay called Boogerman that actually had censored text in the manual and actual game (“Frrt”) because the use of the word “Fart” was deemed offensive or something silly like that. My, how times have changed (and juvenile humor just hasn’t, right?).

As you can see (and probably smell)m above, the newly rechristened Orc Attack: Flatulent Rebellion, set to hit PC, PSN and XBLA later this year. I’ll keep an eyeball peeled for this one, as it looks like fun, but I want a gas mask before I play it (and maybe some earplugs so those assorted gassy noises don’t distract me)…

Oh, you may as well meet playable character Friar Krap since you’ve read this far. Er, enjoy? Amusingly enough, I was planning on cooking up some cabbage or sauteed broccoli with garlic to go with my chicken soup for dinner later this evening, but these videos have made me change my dining plans a bit. Maybe I’ll stick to the water and water on the rocks tonight…

Bundle Stars’ Dollar Deal Means Alien & Zombie Hunting Seasons Are Open…

Posted on May 13, 2013 by geelw

bundlestars_logo I’ve been a fan of Sigma Team’s “mindless” shooters for a few years going back to the original Alien Shooter, so this latest Bundle Stars deal is not only a must-buy for me at this stupidly insane price, YOU should pick it up because you probably need some practice for the upcoming fake Zombie Apocalypse that too many people seem to think is coming. Really. As in freakin’ AMAZON HAS A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE STORE THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY BUY SURVIVAL SUPPLIES FROM! Yeah, we’re that paranoid (and stupid) these days, but at least we’re well prepared, right? But I digress… One dollar (adjusted into UK currency, so it’s actually 65p there you”re paying), four full version games, loads of zombies and aliens to kill. All that and it’s only Monday? Count me in!

Even better, Bundle Stars has also re-listed its super-selling Indie Jam deal (TEN titles for a paltry $6.40!) and Indie Jam #2 is still live for nine more days (NINE titles for an even more paltry $5.04!). Check your system requirements to make sure you can run these, Grab them all (and a free STEAM account if you don’t have one yet) and figure out later how the hell you’re going to find time to PLAY all the games you just bought for less than you paid for a day’s meals. You’ll be hitting up Google looking for time machine plans that actually work, I bet…

Indie Royale’s Mayhem Bundle: Spend A Little, Get A Lot of Bodies Dropping…

Posted on May 13, 2013 by geelw

MAYHEM_bundle This latest budget bundle from Indie Royale should give that crappy Monday you’re having a nice boot out the nearest window. Six great games are up for grabs and all look like a blast in one way or another. I’ve played Alien Shooter 2: Conscription a while back and it’s a great little shooter/RPG hybrid. The similar looking (but co-op/multiplayer focused) Primal Fears actually looks like one of the Hunter: The Reckoning games from a few years back and Burn Zombie Burn? Well, that title would make me buy it on general principal. Of the other games, Droplitz is a no-brainer for puzzle fanatics, Plain Sight looks pretty cool (despite your ninja/robot avatar needing to blow itself up for points all the time) and Lucius actually looks like someone took the original 1976 film The Omen and based the game around it (which means it’ll be nice and gory as you guide the little devil around and wipe out that mansion full of unfortunates).

Of course, the latter probably isn’t the game you want the babysitter to play at all, as it’ll give him or her nightmares and he or she’ll never drop by ever again. But, hey – what you do with your newly acquired cheap games is all up to you, right?

Resident Evil Revelations “Shock and Panic” Trailer (No, Not About The Wii U Features)…

Posted on May 10, 2013 by geelw

Ah ha ha… I had to get that little joke in because I read some message board posts a week or so ago that were blasting the Wii U version for being “for kids” or something silly like that when clearly, the Wii U Gamepad features in that video below aren’t necessarily “for kids” at all because the main game certainly isn’t. I mean, if you shot or beat a zombie or other creature to death here and CANDY came out or maybe BUBBLES and RAINBOWS, maybe I’d be on your side. Or maybe not, as I generally don’t take sides in these debates at all – I just play the games and let you know that I like them and yes, you should spend your money accordingly.

That and hell, you just KNOW that there’s going to be a lot of otherwise “mature” gamers running around drawing naughty bits every chance they get and smirking like straight-jacketed hyenas when they see their handiwork show up on some website as part of some review or news item. Trolls like these breed when they need to feed, I say. Resident Evil Revelations hits PC, PS3, Wii U and Xbox 360 on May 21, 2013 – Some hands-on time is coming up next week, so expect some words from and to the wise about this one shortly…

Resident Evil Revelations “Survive” Case File: Well, Duh!

Posted on May 8, 2013 by geelw

Can you imagine a Resident Evil game where you HAD to keep getting killed by all sorts of enemies? Good, neither can I. Of course, if you’re really bad at the game and constantly freaked out by the horrors stumbling and shuffling about on that boat from hell, well… you can always go get someone to play the game for you while you camp out on the couch and jump when something scary pops up and starts chasing your surrogate around. Then again, no one likes a back seat driver when they’re playing a game you’re to scared to play, right?

The Incredible Adventures of Van Helsing: Building Character – An Important Life Skill In Games, Too…

Posted on May 7, 2013 by geelw

Here’s more for NeoCore Game’s upcoming action/RPG that’s shaping up to be a huge and very-well polished indie sleeper hit worth grabbing when it launches on May 22, 2013. Hopefully, this will do well enough to get ported to more platforms, as there’s nothing like a good chase ‘n chop to wile away the hours and get caught up in all the loot you’ll rack up as you stack up the monster corpses. As usual, we shall see, but I’ll predict that is this one shows up as bug-free as possible and doesn’t require a new PC to run, it’ll be a must-play among genre fans…

Resident Evil Revelations “Infect” Trailer: You Are What Eats You…

Posted on May 5, 2013 by geelw

[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRl5B3p_0Kw]

That hot breath on your neck isn’t that handsome hunk or hot babe who was eyeballing you at the bar the other week, that’s for sure. And hell, even if it is, he or she is all undead and stinky enough that even a box full of clothespins soaked in assorted essential oils would do nothing buy squeeze your poor nose and leave it sore and smelling nicer. Anyway, may I suggest high collars and sleeves made from chain mail and some handy lessons with a machete in case that thing chasing you gets up close and too personal. Better safe than sorry, that’s for sure. Resident Evil Revelations is coming to the PC, PS3, Wii U and Xbox 360 on May 21, 2013… prepare for a long trip at sea and plenty of creatures who don’t get seasick hot on your heels…

Resident Evil Revelations Dev Diary 2: Infection & Repulsion (Not The Birds & The Bees Version)…

Posted on May 3, 2013 by geelw

Well, I’m SURE Capcom’s Resident Evil team wasn’t thinking about YOUR weekend shenanigans when they were making this game for the Nintendo 3DS and remaking it for current-gen consoles and PC. Hmmmm, you do know that these games are a great deal better when enjoyed for what they are, right? No need to project everything onto your entertainment, now. Shh, there, there… it’s alright. You just need to go get scared half to death by playing a little game. May I suggest this one? How about Resident Evil Revelations, coming to PC, PS3, Wii U and Xbox 360 on May 21, 2013? You’ll get your fix in on a few fronts and have something to talk about around the water cooler at work that won’t make people think you’re a total creep. Well, unless they have a thing for zombies and other twisted creatures they’re not telling you about…

Resident Evil Revelations “Horror” Trailer: Just So You Know What’s Ahead…

Posted on May 2, 2013 by geelw

Of course, you’d figure with all these unsettling warnings being found in all these Resident Evil games, the less intrepid special agent or neophyte zombie hunters out there would want to turn right on around and go home to catch up on those TV shows they’ve been missing out on, but nope. Usually, it’s a “one way in, one way out” situation where they’d better suck it up and press forwards, as there’s usually something large that’s going to be nipping at their heels soon enough. Well, substitute “whole body” for heels and yeah, you get the idea. I say wear some comfortable running shoes and do a bit of stretching before setting out to take down those monsters. There’s nothing worse (or more embarrassing) than pulling a hammy when you’re running away from something that’s slow moving but has a hell of a lot more teeth than you do. Resident Evil Revelations is headed for the PC, PS3, Xbox 360 and Wii U on May 21, 2013 – “Be there, Aloha!”