Star Trek: Into Darkness Teaser #2: Or: On Funding More Dream Therapy For J.J. Abrams…

 

Hmmmm… Does J.J. Abrams have the same scary dream about falling every night? Seriously. I haven’t seen so many people jumping off high places into certain doom in a trailer in a while. OK, well… that silly trailer to the last Die Hard flick was lousy with stupidly impossible to survive jumps, but I’ll catch the full film once it hits cable and see if that’s just one sequence split into a few parts for the trailer edit. Still, I just laugh away merrily now when I see one of J.J.’s flicks because I’m EXPECTING someone to do a running jump off of something tall and into an action sequence. Of course, if there’s a big gust of air that carries the jumping human bean UP and onto something else for a one point safe landing as a cool twist, I’ll be even more thrilled. Well, as thrilled as one could be from seeing the same sequence repeated in a few different films. Anyway, nice teaser here, right? I say go pay to see this just so the director can eventually pay his way through therapy and find out what this falling fetish is all about.

Evil Dead TV Spot: “Everything’s Fine”… Unless You’re A Character In This Film…

 

“The joint is jumpin’… it’s really jumpin’…”

That’s because the damn house is HAUNTED, Fats. Nasty ol’ evil Book of the Dead ring any bells for you? No? Hmmm… let me explain it a bit better in English: Get the h-e-l-l off that damn piano and make a run for the door, big man.

OK, I’m not one for ridiculous over-hype, but this flick just may be worth the bother to drag my tired butt down to the local cinema to catch. I keep flipping the usual mental coin about more and more movies and usually (since I use a two-headed coin) I end up waiting for the cable premiere. As my LAST coin toss saw my trick quarter fly out a window never to be seen again, I have to judge things more like everyone else. So far, it’s been going well, so we’ll see how this turns out. I have no huge expectations going into this, but I just may pack a pair of extra underwear and pants just in case…

Random Film of the Week: STARCRASH (The Adventures of Stella Star)

 

Italian cinema has brought forth plenty of classic films and directors of assorted skill levels from Fellini to Leone, Argento, Bava and more, but Luigi Cozzi (or Lewis Coates, his “Americanized” name) deserves a special place in the hearts of a certain group of cinema fans. Known for doing relatively quick and cheap knock-offs of popular sci-fi and fantasy films, there’s a certain bizarre charm to his “major” genre works that demands repeat viewings. That and hell, if you ever have a toothache and want to forget all about the pain, you can count on a few of Cozzi’s films to make you do just that. Then again, you may just injure some other body part when you roll off a couch or chair laughing. STARCRASH is one such film and for some, the movie they saw in theaters when Star Wars seating was unavailable during that film’s long run (I recall it playing for about a year in some spots) or 1978 reissue. I was one of those people and I don’t think I’ve ever recovered from the experience… but I have gained a bit more appreciation for this offbeat mess over the decades. Continue reading

Iron Man 3 (Trailer 2): Just In Case You Were Wondering If It Was Going to be Good…

Hmm… It seems Marvel Productions is going to be pushing this one much harder than they need to, but that’s fine by me. The multiple TV spots should be fun to watch as they follow the “serious/action/catchy joke finale” thing most of these comic book flicks (and heck, most other movies) get when truncated down to 15 to 30 second spots. I don’t think I’ll run them all or I’d need to change the name of the site to “IRON MAN 3 Trailers!” or something corny like that.

Overkill was never my style (nor was coming up with good alternate site names, as you’ve probably guessed)…

Iron Man 3 Trailer: The Stark Knight Rises? We Shall See…

 

Well, that was pretty cool after all. Darker and adding elements from some of the older comics while tossing in plenty of surprises (and army of Iron Men AND a Hulkbuster at the end? Nice). Of course, under all that sturm und drang it’ll be interesting to see if this third installment can feel as fresh as the first while making sure there’s humor in the right spots AND all that actually fine looking mix of CG and practical effects can get and keep asses dropping into seats for long enough that Marvel is happy-dancing around the room on day one. If that happens, they’ll be bouncing around on Hopptity Hop money sacks within a month’s time, as will anyone who signed up for a percentage of the gross (if that’s even done anymore). I actually like that they took one of the all-time corniest but cool villains (The Mandarin) and actually made him a big menace. Well, the great Gene Colan’s version was always creepy-looking, but that’s the late master at work, I say. Well, May 3 is zipping up soon, so my prediction is a no-brainer that this one will be a big pre-summer smash with legs to keep going worldwide.

Random Film of the Week(end), Too*: Juan of the Dead

 

*Hey! You get an extra RFotW  column because I usually do two or so a week and I’ve been a bit too busy to watch as many movies as I’d like. Lucky you!

JotDAs we’re near completely brainwashed here in America that anything related to Cuba is bad or will turn you into a flag-waving, manifesto carrying Commie if you so much breathe in its general direction (save for stuff that can really kill us if over-consumed like Cuban cigars, Cuban sandwiches, or a fatal clot in the ass or legs from that 48-hour I Love Lucy marathon because you wanted to catch that ONE episode you missed), seeing a great indie zombie flick pop up out of that country is a nicely reaffirming sign that people are indeed alike all over. Juan of the Dead, despite the knockoff title and low budget, is a really fine addition to the crowded zombie flick genre thanks to plenty of gore and decent FX work, a load of humor targeted at current and past political policies and a solid cast that’s just fantastic throughout.

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Random Film of the Week(end): Antichrist

 

“A grieving couple retreat to ’Eden’, their isolated cabin in the woods, where they hope to repair their broken hearts and troubled marriage. But nature takes its course and things go from bad to worse…”

antichrist dafoeOh, that’s Antichrist in a nutshell for you, but that’s not Antichrist at all if you’re expecting some weepy blockbuster weekend grossing drama straight out of the Hollywood genre playbook (silver linings version). Then again, if you know Lars von Trier’s work, you know you’re not getting anything you “expect” and in fact, going in blind is the best way to enjoy any of his films. That said (and speaking of blind), after watching this one, you’ll probably want to remove your eyes and boil them for a few minutes. That said, if you happen to see this one with people who tend to over-think too much about movies or relationships you can expect have a hell of a conversation afterwards about all sorts of things…

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Random Film of the Week(end): Rubber

 

I absolutely love that some horror fans HATE Quentin Dupiex’ Rubber (or as it’s called in France, Rubber) for a few reasons. I’m betting he knew that’s just what would happen when the jaded but none too bright gore fanatics out there rolled into theaters or caught this on cable thinking they’d be getting a relentlessly violent and gory flick that just so happened to be non-stop hilarious. Well, it IS indeed gory and often quite funny… but it’s also a one or two gag film that works it hard by going in many directions (often at once) as well as one of the more absurdly meta movies you’ll ever see. You know you’re in for a weird time when a movie starts off with two characters on a desert road talking about how things happen for “no reason” before an audience in the distance waiting around is handed binoculars in order to watch what happens next. That’s probably the most normal thing you’ll see for the next 80+ minutes, by the way…

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The Croods: Prehistoric Party Hands-On: The New “Modern Stone Age Family” Board Game

 

croods_wii_keyart (Custom)croods_wiiu_keyart (Custom) With Dreamworks’ new family friendly animated film The Croods heading for a March 22, 2013 release in theaters, D3Publisher of America is getting a fun little tie in game out exclusively to all four current Nintendo platforms. The Croods: Prehistoric Party isn’t at all the platformer you’d expect to drop into stores as a quickie cash in product, but a fun board game in the vein of the Mario Party franchise that packs in mini-games galore for one to four players. D3P rolled into NYC last week with a Wii U build and I got a nice bit of playtime with it as well as a look at the movie trailer (below the jump for your viewing pleasure if you’ve yet to see it). Torus Games has whipped up a cool-looking easy to hop into game that should get anyone who liked the film cracking up in front of the TV and bringing a few friends or family members along for the ride…

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Random Film of the Week(end): Bath Salt Zombies

 

BSZ_CoverAs far as low-budget horror flicks go in this day and age, MVD Entertainment Group’s latest DVD release, Bath Salt Zombies is a gory wonder of economy that’s an intentionally cheesy, but wickedly fun time. Packing in plenty of blood, twisted humor, skin-ripping gore, a couple of sexy ladies, more gore, a few crazily creative fight scenes, cheap backdrops (did I mention gore?), and a leading man with quite the knack for freaky rubber-faced expressions. It’s Type AB-solutely NOT for the kiddies, so go roll them into the closet with a box of eBay Ho-Ho’s (or substitute those nastier Little Debbie rip-offs that taste like sugar dipped chocolate rolled sponges – they won’t know the diff), kick back and definitely catch this flick if you’re into the hot and heavy cult horror thing it’s got going on… Continue reading