Mr. Peabody & Sherman Turkey Day Poster Stuffed Full Of Self-Fulfilling Prophecy…

mr_peabody_and_sherman_ver8Yeah, I’d be canning whomever thought up this poster like a bunch of cranberries, as my cartoon nostalgia sense tells me that this one will be dead on arrival after the first weekend at best. This turkey is planning to gobble up box office dollars while neglecting the fact that the original shorts worked perfectly because they clocked in at about five minutes and weren’t padded out with needless stuff that’s only going to appeal to folks who’ve never seen an episode of the Bullwinkle cartoons they came from. Ah well… I guess I should just shut the heck up and surrender, huh?

FINE. But not without a fight:

(thanks, bullwinklecanada!) 

When I saw the trailer for the new CG flick the first time, I didn’t laugh at all, and seeing it again recently made me more annoyed than ever. But whatever, right? It’ll be “fun” for the kids that don’t care at all about history and nostalgia, that’s for sure. On the other hand… when the adults in the theater are groaning at the end like the ones behind me who hadn’t seen the trailer until then, I’m gathering Dreamworks will be wishing for their very own time machine so they can go back and erase this project from their books. Yuk.

Mr. Peabody & Sherman Trailer: Wards of the State, Juvenile Delinquent Version…

 
Urgh. OK, I think I asked this question before, but just WHO is this film targeted to? Us cranky ass oldsters who grew up watching Rocky & Bullwinkle, Fractured Fairy Tales and yes, these two characters are grinding our collective teeth about this CG travesty, the kids of today won’t have a C-L-U-E what the heck this is about other than the usual dumbed down predictable plot that lasts and hour and half and has pop songs packed in and the obligatory fake outtakes in the credits. Parents not in the know about Jay Ward and his creations (and style of humor) will of course, dutifully pack up the tots and trundle in to see this, buy the toys and other merchandise and thing all is peachy keen and as harmless as a stuffed poodle.

Me, I’ll be hitting my head with a hammer and hoping at least one or two critics point out that the Peabody segments were excellent because they worked best as unconnected shorts that were over and done with in a few minutes. Stretching things to feature length and adding needless stuff and worse modern jokes is only bleeding any chance for redemption from this one dry in record time. I didn’t even crack a smile during this trailer and that’s a bad sign because my sense of humor is pretty off the wall and expansive. Hey, I could be totally wrong, people… but it’s not a good sign in this day and age of movie trailers coughing up all the best parts of a movie in that two minutes or so. Hmmm… we shall see, I suppose…

TURBO Thoughts (and Too Much Honesty…)

Turbo_RRSo, TURBO wasn’t bad at all. The 3D is OK, the kids will dig it, the parents will get a laugh at the stuff that’s written in for them (which will lead to the kids BUGGING you with “What’s so funny?” until you have to shush them and say you’ll tell them later) and it’s bound to get some sort of sequel (even if it’s straight to video, as I can see a certain character wanting revenge).

For the record, you’re not seeing this for any Oscar-winning performances or the “best” in animation (although what’s here is quite good in that stylized manner expected of a CG family flick). But there’s nothing wrong with turning one’s brain off, plopping into a seat and watching a snail imbued with nitrous and possibly sports energy drink super-speed blaze around and exhaust nearly every possible gag about fast gastropods. I say NEARLY because it seems as if they’re saving the rest for that inevitable sequel. Not sure the same cast will be back (hey, money isn’t free!), but I bet there are a lot of actors who can sound just like the cast here and no kid will be the wiser.

(thanks, DreamWorksAnimation!) 

Turbo_tixSpeaking of wiser, I’m guessing whatever good karma I have just got a kick up a notch as I was looking for a restroom after the show and while poking about the floor I was on, I opened a door and walked into a showing of Pacific Rim that was about a half hour away from the ending. I suppose I could have been a jerk, grabbed a seat and stuck around for the next showing, but I had to pee and I also needed to get to work on some posts today and a few other things I’d planned out previously (Hey, laundry sorting is important! Separating the pile into bags keeps it from forming into THE BEAST FROM THE CLOSET!*). I did pop my 3D specs on to checkout how the film looked and it wasn’t bad. Then again, I think I also left because I hate coming into a film near the ending (or hell, after it begins). I like watching stuff from the start and paying attention, not playing connect the dots (unless I’m re-watching Rashomon, Memento or Pulp Fiction one more time)…

Oh yeah, the restrooms were on a higher floor, which I found odd for such a huge theater, but oh well…

EDIT: Aha- I see that Dreamworks is as always, twenty paces ahead of me. There’s going to be a TV series called Turbo: F.A.S.T. (Fast Action Stunt Team), which will air on Netflix in December 2013, so there you go. I don’t use Netflix (*gasp!*), so like that that Arrested Development reboot, I’ll be missing this too. Hopefully, the series won’t drop all its episodes at once and burn itself out like AD did (the show always worked best in small doses), but I guess we’ll see what happens. Er, you who use Netflix will see what happens…

(*No, I don’t keep my dirty laundry in a closet and neither should you. It’ll stink up the place if left in too long AND it’ll fuse together into the shape of some elder god of dirty clothes and eat you as you sleep. You’ve been warned…)

Turbo Super Stunt Squad Hands-On: Zippy Trick Snails Remind Me A Bit Of The Old Days…

Image converted using ifftoany

Dreamworks Animation is having quite a busy year with a few big releases zipping into theaters this year, and D3Publisher is right in the same zone, getting out a few cool family-friendly titles tying into these assorted properties. Turbo (set for a July 19 release) is the next film zooming your way and D3P’s Turbo: Super Stunt Squad will also pop up as a multiplatform release (PS3, Xbox 360, Wii/Wii U, Nintendo DS/3DS) a few days before on July 16, 2013 (what, no Vita version?). I had the chance to take the Xbox 360 and 3DS versions for a spin earlier this month and came away with a smile, as the games are coming along as fine and well-made tie-ins to the upcoming film.

While you’re not going to be getting any hyperbole-packed “Game of the Year!” reviews from a licensed game like this (and you shouldn’t expect any, mind you), developer Monkey Bar Games is whipping up a fun, cool homage of sorts to the classic Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater with this stunt-filled racer/exploration game that’s sure to put smiles on a few faces…

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Stop The Wayback Machine! Mr. Peabody & Sherman (and Rocky & Bullwinkle) Are Coming Back? Eeek.

The Old Gang File this entry in the “Wait, what?” Department. Hmmm… on ONE front, this is truly awesome news, as I’m as old as the hills and LOVE Jay Ward’s humor and these characters to death. That said, I’m all too curious as to just WHO the Hecuba this new comic series (and upcoming Dreamworks animated movie) are targeted at.

I’d bet only those very-oldsters like me and whatever college-agers who happen to get a knowing chuckle from the old cartoons will even give a damn, while the Generation “Why” kids that get dragged to this will be sitting there texting for an hour and a half or so. Or worse, sitting there with their arms folded with a cranky “I’m going to kill you in your sleep!” look on their ungrateful faces because some parental unit tried to get them to like something THEY loved as an impressionable kid or young adult.

Of course, I’m betting that instead of historical figures from the past we old folks learned about in school, IDW might tap into more modern and a lot less “historical” figures from pop culture or other time periods that, frankly speaking, won’t be as funny to mine for the old show’s offbeat (and intentionally incorrect) pokes. Ugh… now I have memories of that eyeball and brain searing take on The Three Stooges from a few years back…

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Review: The Croods Prehistoric Party (DS/3DS)

Croods DS_3DSPlatform: Nintendo DS/3DS

Developer: Torus Games

Publisher: D3Publisher of America

# of Players: 1 – 4

ESRB Rating: E (Everyone)

Official Site: (3DS) (DS)

Score: C (70%)

Like the Wii and Wii U versions, The Croods Prehistoric Party is a collection of 30 mini-games that range from pretty darn fun to slightly (and temporarily) baffling.  While colorful and lots of fun to play, both of the portable versions miss the golden opportunity to add any sort of multiplayer modes. In terms of design decisions on a handheld that has a number of fine multiplayer and party-themed games, this is actually a lot more baffling than that occasional mini-game you won’t get right away. As for how this is as a solo game, well, playing against the AI is at best, a bit too easy and at worst, way too easy once you find a few exploits too tempting to pass up… Continue reading

Review: The Croods Prehistoric Party (Wii/Wii U)

croods_wiiu_keyart (Custom)croods_wii_keyart (Custom)Platform: Nintendo Wii/Wii U

Developer: Torus Games

Publisher: D3Publisher of America

# of Players: 1 – 4

ESRB Rating: E (Everyone)
Official Site (Wii U) (Wii)

Score: B (80%)

If you automatically expect a licensed game based on a family-friendly hit animated film to be yet another platform jumper in terms of gameplay and the usual appearance on multiple consoles, The Croods: Prehistoric Party may end up surprising you a bit on two fronts. First, it’s only for Nintendo’s consoles and handhelds and second, it’s a board game on the Wii and Wii U and a collection of mini-games on the DS and 3DS. Both home versions are exactly the same, save for the ability for solo players or one in a group having at it to play with the Wii U Gamepad. Like the Mario Party series, you’ll have more fun with up to three friends, but it’s entirely possible to play through the game against the AI and have a pretty decent time… Continue reading

The Croods: Prehistoric Party Hits Nintendo Systems: It’s Time to Get Seriously Stoned!

 

Hey! You thought I’d forgotten to post today, hmmm? Well, I was working on some reviews at the home office and then I went to a screening of Dreakworks’ latest CG animated flick, The Croods. It’s actually quite good and pretty hilarious with some fine performances overall. Nicholas Cage actually makes a MUCH better animated caveman in this film than he does in the last couple of movies he’s made (ha ha), the 3D is pretty cool and yep, there’s a message rolling throughout, so expect some dramatic points mixed in with all the fun.

 

 

Just in time for the film, D3Publisher of America is shipping out The Croods: Prehistoric Party for the Nintendo Wii U and Wii, as a collection of 30+ mini-games presented in a fun family board game format a la Mario Party. The 3DS and DS also get versions of this, but geared toward solo play action.