Yeah, yeah, it’s based on a reeeeaaaaalllly popular book or whatever and yep, it’s geared to that teen crowd who needs their latest faux horror entertainment fix or whatever. But, bleh. Trailer above, first four minutes below. OK, I’m not THAT much of a cranky jerk – I’m just disappointed at what passes for a decent mainstream horror flick these days. I’ll admit it IS funny, but when I see zombies, I usually see ZERO laughs. Or at least laughs that are dark and completely cringe-worthy because you know it’s funny but you shouldn’t be laughing when you look at the big picture. Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland, anyone?

That said, the original 1968 version of Night of the Living Dead? That’s the gold standard for my old ass (and it should be for yours if you’ve never seen it). If it’s on cable and I’m awake and not watching anything important, I’ll catch that flick again and again because it works on a ton of levels these teen films miss entirely. That goes for today’s “vampire” flicks too, which need a SERIOUS revamping (no pun intended) OK, save for a few minutes and that ending, I liked that Fright Night remake a lot because it was actually funny, had a few good scares and an excellent performance from Colin Farrell (who makes a pretty creepy vampire). Let’s not even talk about the curse of Twilight, as billions of dollars in box office or not, those sparkly things aren’t even close to being a Nosferatu, Blacula or even a Count Yorga (yeah, I went there just to get you Googling)…