Random Art: Stuff to Not Wake Up and See #5 (Collect ‘em All!)

Posted on September 11, 2013 by geelw

If you’re going by the dictionary definition (well, a modern dictionary) or watch too much Cinemax, the idea of the humble Succubus going about her nightly work might actually sound a bit too thrilling to some of the guys out there (she’s SO sassy!), but you may want to pay attention. Or at least wish you paid MORE attention back in school.

Allow me to learn you by stealing my own quote here:

There’s nothing like running into one of these ladies of the evening, which just so happen to be the possessed (and extremely pissed off) corpses of mistreated ladies of the evening.

Unlike your garden variety succubus, these much more evil things aren’t going to try and lure you in with batting eyelashes and swivel-hipped strolling. Let’s just say you’re not going to forget your first time, as it’ll be your last (and yep, it’s going to hurt quite a lot)…

So, yeah… Pleasant Dreams (BTW, just keep the window shut and maybe wear something with lavender sprinkled on it. Succubi HATE lavender)…

Random Art: Stuff to Not Wake Up and See #4 (Collect ’em All!)

Posted on September 11, 2013 by geelw

Well, if you happen to live in the woods or near the woods and see a nasty-looking rotted hand pop up from the cold hard ground, you probably don’t have to worry TOO much. If it were a “real” zombie, it would have to be someone who was buried without being embalmed and even if they DID spring back to life, by the time that undead (or re-living) creep made his or her way back up, they’d be missing most or all of their fingers and probably an arm. So, nope, don’t scream at all. Either stroll over to the phone and ring up the authorities or if you happen to own a legal firearm, well… I guess that’s an actual trespasser you can take care of without getting in too much trouble. Granted, you’ll be needing to explain how the hell an non-embalmed body came out of the ground on your property, but if you didn’t put it there, that clueless act you’ll be putting on will be one hundred percent legitimate. Pleasant Dreams!

Random Art: Stuff to Not Wake Up and See #3 (Collect ’em All!)

Posted on September 8, 2013 by geelw

Hmmm… I spy with my little eye… Eek. Actually, this eye spider isn’t all that big like you see here, but they do tend to get right up in your face and lurk there until you happen to open your own eyes and see it there. You could say “the eyes have it”, with “it” being your undivided attention as this thing starts doing its thing.

Oh, yeah… you’ll want to not scream at all, as they tend to love hopping into that open mouth and taking a little trip inside. I guess you could slap a few rolls of double sided tape around the bedroom and maybe on the bed, but there’s a good chance all you’ll end up doing is lose some hair on your head and assorted body parts from turning in your sleep. Pleasant dreams!

Random Art: Stuff to Not Wake Up and See #2 (Collect ’em All)

Posted on September 7, 2013 by geelw

I was actually going to post this one later in the week, but what the hey. I’m in a good mood today or something like that. Actually, I’m making progress in reworking the bunch of stuff I lost on that USB drive, so I guess this is a happy face (sings: “Put on a happy faaaaaaace!”). Yeah, OK. Let me stop here before your eardrums fall out and/or someone mails me a puppy or something. Don’t so that, by the way. Animlas seem to like me, but I have eye allergies that act up something awful around most animals with hair (and some people, too).

Hey, I’m a happy guy, really I am! I think this piece is incomplete anyway, as it’s part of an older drawing I clipped out and blew up on my scanner before dinking around with it in a few paint programs. Enjoy (I guess)… and pleasant dreams!

Random Art: Stuff to Not Wake Up and See #1 (Collect ’em All!)

Posted on September 7, 2013 by geelw

Yeah, everyone has bad dreams, but you do wake up and usually things are back to some semblance of normalcy. On the other hand, you could be drifting out of dreamland and as your eyeballs are creeping open to catch that alarm clock a minute before it goes off, you see this mug staring into your mug. Feel free to swing a fist, pillow, pet or if you find it somewhat cute, give a big friendly hug. The surprise of any of the former actions will usually cause it to faint (a bit melodramatically, with a loud squeak and probably some gassy action), allowing you to make good your escape.

(OK, it’s just a portion of an old sketch I blew up and tinkered with in a paint program before making up a quick story behind the image. Just killing some time while downloading some files, folks…)

A Day Off For a Bit of Art…

Posted on August 26, 2013 by geelw

Hokay, I needed a bit of a break from the ziggurat of stuff to do (or is it juggernaut? I forget), so yesterday I did some fun stuff like a larger piece of brain-clearing art (above), clean out a big box of stuff that gave me a splitting headache by the time I got to the bottom and then I escaped into the summer air for a stroll and after a mental coin toss, some impromptu entertainment. There’s nothing like supporting the arts, folks. Alright, it’s late (the train ride home took forever, thanks to track work and the ride taking three times as long). Off to bed for me (after I go find an aspirin)…

That Trip to the Swamp Might Make A Good Hotfoot Cure At Least…

Posted on August 18, 2013 by geelw

I forgot to add a suitable image to that Status post, so some quick digging gets you this old (and incomplete) watercolor art from 1990 to ogle. Blub. Actually, I burned my foot pouring some water for a cup of tea a few minutes back, but it’s not an emergency room deal (it did hurts like hell, though). So, hopping into a swamp might be a good idea right about now.

Off to hop about here and see if there’s any aloe floating around. I think there is, but if not I can do the Flintstone Flop across the street and pick up a plant at the supermarket… back in a bit.

Work in Hell Can Be Fun (If You’re Supervisor, That Is)…

Posted on August 17, 2013 by geelw

While it’s incredibly easy to get a job in Hell (they’ve got a 100% employment rate there), you’d probably want to seek out a higher level position as opposed to being trapped in the usual entry level position for eternity. Granted, EVERYONE starts out as entry level there, but it’s the true go-getters that actually make their way up the corporate ladder. All you have to do is ask your supervisor about how he or she got his or her gig and they’ll probably NOT tell you anything at all, whip you some more (or send you to the lava wash… you really don’t want to work there, trust me) or flat out lie about it.

Perseverance pays off handsomely (as does pushing your old supervisor off something high onto something hard and flat, hot and bubbly or really pointy – bonus points for all three at once) and you’ll soon find yourself yelling and punishing with the best of them…

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You KNOW You NEED A Vacation When…

Posted on August 14, 2013 by geelw

Places you’re been to turn into warped versions of themselves even in the photos you’ve taken. Of course, this is what both real Paris and Hell Paris look like after a few drinks (actually, Hell Paris ALWAYS looks like this, and remember… there’s no beer served in Hell at all despite what some of those signs you’ll come across say).

In short, I really need a vacation, but first I need to be able to PAY for a vacation. I’m working on that, or at least trying to make more money in general. If I can’t go somewhere fancy, it’s at least good enough to pretend at somewhere local and appropriate in its selection of diversions.

OK, OK… I could just go back to Hell for a bit, but I think they’re starting to notice I keep popping up for the free hot buffet and leaving right before the mandatory floor show experience. Hey, that key I found on the street happens to fit the exit door AND gets me in the front gate when I wave it at the guard, so I may as well use it while I can, right?

Random Art: OK, I Wasn’t THAT Lazy…

Posted on August 4, 2013 by geelw

Nyah. I actually did some art this weekend, so there! I was waiting for a bunch of downloads to complete and knocked out a few tree drawings in MS Paint. I guess that counts as “work” right? RIGHT? OK, so I don’t make a dime from my art these days, but hey… practice keeps my brain from folding itself up into a little box. Although, my poor wrist is kicking me in the shins from making that mouse do all those tricks (and the mouse isn’t paid either for it’s troubles. It’s wireless and that makes it tailless and you should be singing “Three Blind Mice” right about now…)