Dark Sky Films | "DESTROY ALL FANBOYS!"

(thanks, Tommy Retro’s Blast From The Past!)

As it’s almost (but not quite) beach season (unless it’s summer when you’re actually reading this, then BEWARE!) here’s a cautionary tale for you hep cats and hip chicks looking for some fun in the soon to be summer sun: DON’T DO IT! Hell, I mean between the assorted oil and chemical spills and their assorted hasty to long term cleanups that just add MORE nasty chemicals to the waters around everywhere, you’re only bound to run into something monstrous coming out of the water (or heck, just IN the water) that wants to EAT. YOUR. FLESH! (Mua-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!, but somewhat true! Eeeek!).

Anyway, 1964’s Horror on Party Beach kind of predicted this modern age of old-school waste making hasty retreats for beaches everywhere, but the film was SO bad that no one listened because they were busy laughing their bottoms off as this bottom of the fish barrel “Z”-grade spook-tacular stunk up a theater near them… Continue reading →

Hatchet III Teaser Poster I found the first two Hatchet flicks pretty fun and funny because they’re so “old school slasher movie” that you can’t help but crack a smile at how well they work in presenting the requisite unstoppable big killer with PLENTY of victims to turn into assorted hash and that one character he’s after who won’t go down without a damn good fight. Granted, the films aren’t perfect at all, but that’s part of their charm, I say…

Speaking of charm, it looks as if the third time’s that with this upcoming sequel, Hatchet III as it’s basically a big carnival of chop with a lot of chasing thrown in for good measure. Not for the kiddies unless you want to have them sleeping under YOUR bed afterwards. That’s your Good Parenting Tip of the Week, by the way, so don’t say I’ve never done anything for you. Hmmm, perhaps I should start charging form my sage advice as some of my friends suggest? OK, fine – in the words of Lucy van Pelt, “That’ll be five cents, please!”