I’ve noticed loads of complaints regarding privacy and other pesky issues with mobile data carriers, movie and game content services and anything that requires a lengthy Terms Of Service (TOS) agreement to be read before a consumer gives his or her OK. Given that almost no one actually seems to read through these things before or after they’ve clicked that “OK” button only to go ballistic later on when they find out they’ve lost another basic civil right, I propose a fail-safe solution that will take care of the problem. And as I’m all about job creation these days, this solution will also get a few people employed in the process.

Here’s the dead: get a bunch of Hollywood actor-types to shoot a video/record audio where they read through a TOS contract and stick it on the next update as a mandatory viewing or listening experience. It’ll be just like a TV ad for medications, but read so that you can actually hear every word. Yeah, the entire user base of every device on the market will rant their asses off online (I can see the fires lighting as I type this out). But hell, at least they can’t say that they didn’t know what they were in for in terms of the next invasion of a tiny bit more of their privacy, right?

Hey Santa, you bum! Where the hell are those shelves I asked so nicely for about what, five years ago? You keep eating all the cookies and drinking the booze-spiked eggnog I leave out and I always get socks and underwear that don’t fit. Anyway, the jig is up, fat man. Make good with the wood or I’m putting a little surprise in YOUR stocking! That is all… Now, go get those elves sawing away. Good U.S. of A. wood, too, not some splinter-packed plywood or that laminated particle board crap that wouldn’t make a decent diner table, either.