Converse All Wah: Shocking New Way To Rock Out


All kidding aside (keep reading, it’s coming), I’d love to try a set of these kicks out. Hell, they’ll get me to pick up a guitar again after too long just to see how long I can “play” in my atonal way until the neighbors call to cops because they think someone is boiling a sack of howling piranha. I haven’t owned a pair of Chucks for ages, but these Converse All Wah demoed by Dinosaur Jr’s J Masics (who looks like Dinosaur Sr. these days, but he can rock it harder than the younger set any day of the week) got some of my own parts vibrating giddily. Boom chicka-wah-wahhhhh!

That said, I can only see wearing these indoors or only a dry day outside because of the obviously eeeeeee-lectrifying reason. I’ll let you think about that while I wind up a joke that some of you got already.

Yeah, try playing that star-spangled electric gitbox while wearing these sneaks in the rain and you’ll get maybe get five notes into Jimi Hendrix’ Purple Haze before you’re totally:

zapped_xlg(thanks, Imp Awards!) Um… #ScuseMeWhileIKissTheSky

…but without the icky upskirting powers, kid. Just extra crispy and clutching that axe in a death metal grip. Eh, I kid Converse, shoe developers Critical Mass and Cute Circuit. These ARE pretty damn cool. All we need now is that Marshall sound coming from a jacket of some sort and it’s instant entertainment anywhere.

Sign up here to keep updated on the All-Wah. I predict a sellout and yeah, they better make ladies sizes too because asses will be kicked when the gal rockers can’t get their kicks and want to kick back.
– GW

UGLYDOLL & the Ave Venice Team Up For Some Cool Custom Chucks…

uglydoll logo blk the AVE logo

ugly-dolls-ninja-battyUsually, someone telling you you’ve got ugly shoes is a not so good thing to hear and can sometimes lead to minor to moderately serious medical issues when that shoe needs to be removed from assorted orifices post-negative unsolicited commentary.

Thankfully for those of you who’ve been on the receiving end of remarks about your footwear (or who’ve planted a boot up someone’s behind for making bad noises about your kicks) can get satisfaction (and a lot less problems sitting down for a week or so) thanks to UGLYDOLL, the Ave Venice and Converse. Check out their four brand new printed Chuck Taylor styles up for grabs for $90 each on the Ave’s website: meet Ninja Batty (above), OX, Ice-Bat and the too-cute to call ugly (unless you just HATE cute things with your permanent bad mood self) UGLYDOLL Flower Pattern (below), all waiting to wrap themselves around your feet for compliments galore.

ugly-dolls-ox-green-1- ugly-dolls-ice-bat-blupat ugly-dolls-ice-bat-flowerpat

Well, perhaps you’ll still have your shoes called UGLY, but at least that’s what they’re supposed to be called (halfway – but it’s a step up!) and yeah, the person saying that will me smiling instead of smirking, which means you’re being hit on and won’t need to let loose with the *boot!* action (well, unless that pest gets too persistent with the moon eyes and compliments on your feet)…