Ho-kaaayyy… for the record, if you even THINK there’s going to be a bacon-flavored mouthwash (with a hint of mint at the end, yet!), you’re nuts. Or plain crazy. Or you’ll be SO upset about this gag that you’ll be calling up some shady law firm and planning to sue Proctor & Gamble for getting your hopes up (or “false advertising”, as it’s called). Granted, if you’re so upset about NOT being able to gargle with artificial pork and salt (and mint!)-flavored alcohol soup and you have THAT kind of money to hire a law firm then perhaps YOU’RE playing the bigger and better April Fool’s gag on a big company that needs that kind of surprise in their Monday morning mail.

Yes, I am a genius. But too busy of one to get to the contacting of a non-busy real or fake lawyer to set this up. Yeah, I’m too lazy, to go to all that trouble as well – so get to it and you’re welcome in advance if your, er, MY idea works out well enough to get you on TV or in a newspaper in your area…