Yes, these are snazzy viral teasers for the RoboCop reboot in case you were thinking I found the key to a TARDIS somewhere and stupidly ONLY brought back this stuff from the future. I’d actually go back to the past a few times and stock up on old comics and a few Van Goghs plus push a few would be dictators off of high balconies or something like that.
Ahem, any-waaaay, these lead ups are quite amusing for sure… now it’s up to the movie to take off and fly right into that box office stratosphere or something corny like that. My mind is otherwise occupied today, so you’ll need to take what’s served up today, sorry!
So, here they come. The first of many TV spots for this upcoming remake. Is it me or are people THAT jaded now that this otherwise fine-looking remake/reboot might not be as big as some on the internet are saying? Eh, not that I pay much mind to what others say on the Internet, mind you. I’m just worried that our new “wait it out” culture will wait it out for the first big early review that merely mentions a flaw, cross their collective arms with a mighty “SEE!,I told you it would suck!” and then go torrent the video off some pirate site only to discover it’s not the train wreck they thought. Of course, trying to get those people to pay for anything entertainment wise is a tough haul, but Hollywood loves to keep trying. Me, I think the film will do just fine when it hits a multiplex near you next month.
Of course, I still CAN’T see any darn movies at all around here now that the two closest movie houses are DEAD. Boo. What kind of crap area is this now? We USED to have five theaters in walking distance not so long ago. My “local” theater is now something like four or five miles away at least. Probably more, as I haven’t checked around for a replacement theater in a while. Eh, small world problem considering REAL issues facing too many these days, right? But hey, little things (like a decent cinema) DO mean a lot to some folks…
Well, here it is, folks – the new RoboCop trailer in all its glory. For me, the jury is still out as the film LOOKS good (in that “we used a LOT of CG!” manner) and it definitely shakes up the original’s origin story significantly in terms of how Murphy gets his metal suit and why it’s now black in the new flick.
On the other hand, it also shares that very similar (and yes, slightly long in the tooth) thematic stuff many of these sci-fi remakes are afflicted with where it’s one man (or many) against the evil, rotten corporate scum who don’t give a rat’s ass about the little people. Cue dramatic music, explosions and bodies falling off stuff. But in PG-13 instead of R-rated violence because that gets more asses in the seats at the end of the day. That and yup, expect this to clock in at under two hours because less time means more showings per day as well. Any bonus footage is coming in the “Unrated” home video version, I’d bet you a hot nickel… Continue reading →
Seriously, the last movie theater here is still closed and I’m feeling a bit morose and annoyed about that fact. I’m hoping that asbestos issue is resolved and it gets opened back up soon. The nearest theater is a multiplex a train or bus ride away, but I’ve heard that it’s overpriced and a pain to get to because you need to walk a bit after the public transportation jaunt. That and it’s packed with the most infuriatingly ill-mannered viewers who pay no heed to cell phone turn-off notices, bring bawling toddlers into R-rated movies and commit other low crimes against civil behavior that a normal person would go mad if they went there on a regular basis. From my source who frequent there because he’s hooked on films more than I am (well, he tends to watch more crap movies than I do), he also knows that the staff lets their friends hang out there (once they buy a ticket) and sneak into the other theaters to catch other films unless there’s a supervisor hanging about to keep things in check. Granted, that stuff has been going on since movie tickets have been sold, so it’s no big deal to me. On the other hand, I can see that being annoying to anyone trying to run a legitimate business where profits need to be calculated on a per-seat basis…
Anyway, reviews seem good on this Carrie remake, so that’s at least a good thing to see…
One clip, a quick TV spot and that dopey prank pulled here in NYC on some unsuspecting citizens strolling into a coffee shop. Of course, in that latter gag, my brain saw the holes in this one right off the bat. If that’s a neighborhood place that’s been open a while, wouldn’t any regulars NOTICE that new wall there or be miffed that their favorite spot was replaced by a wall. Okay, maybe the place was shut for construction with a sign on the door or whatever. Also, a few of those people look as if they were bought in by the studio to act surprised at the action. Granted, most look genuinely shocked, but in this damn city, SOMEONE would have called the cops even on the first scare.
Yeah, I’d have been that ONE guy standing there at the cashier laughing and looking for wires on that guy and wall while still trying to get my damn coffee with a hearty “Hey crazy lady! take that shoving tables crap down the block to McDonalds!” Hell, I’d have even offered her a nice, tasty plain aspirin (I keep a bottle in my bag at all times). Yeah, I’m VERY hard to market anything to. I just like what I like and try to get you do like it as well…
Carrie opens nationwide (except the theater where I live that’s closed. Stupid theater!) on October 18, 2013.
Yeah, so… who HASN’T had to “go to the closet” at some point in their lives? Poor Carrie above only has those telekinetic powers and a nutso mommy to worry about. I know us folks in the real world need to toss ourselves in and shut the door for a while when we pull off those major boners and need a time out while the walls fall in. Say, did you know a nice clean closet with a few blankets tossed on the floor and lots of long coats and shirts and such makes a PERFECT nap spot? Bill collectors, pissed off parents and anyone else can look up and down and all around for you but that’s THE last place they’ll ever, ever look. Of course, if you have a pet at home, you’re screwed plus tax, as those cute little bums will always sniff you out. Hell, you could have the most stoned out, never ever fetched a darn thing in its life lazy ass Scooby-Don’t as a pet and as soon as you get into that closet, he’s nosing open the door to lay on top of those blankets you’re under. Bad dog! BAD!
Um, oh yeah… Carrie is in theaters October 18. I can’t see it because I have no movie theater near me now. Maybe I’ll go take a nap in the closet instead…
Har de har. OK, it may be a darn good remake and all, but I still think Brian DePalma’s version will be the go-to version of Carrie I’ll always prefer for a few reasons. Sure, this new version has Chloe Grace Moretz and Julianne Moore in it as leads, but I can’t see Julianne saying “dirtypillows” without a snicker starting (and the fact that we’ve all see her dirtypillows in a few films, hee hee hee! Hooray for indie films!). Oh, rats… now that’s got me going and the Booby Express song is playing in the background (and too LOUD at that!). Argh! This is SUPPOSED to be a “serious” post! Oh well… done in once more. *Sigh*…
Sometimes You Get It, Sometimes You Don’t Department: About a month back I’m walking to the subway from a press event and there’s this guy walking a cute bulldog (well, cute for a bulldog) who stops at a traffic light while a big truck is trying to turn the corner. As I stroll up next to them and wait the minute or so it’ll take the truck to make the turn, a gal in a nice summer dress pops out of a store, walks up to the guy and starts chatting about his dog, asking if she could pet it. He says “Sure!” and while she’s doing so, she looks up and asks “What’s your dog’s name?” The guy looks down and says “Murphy” and yes, I let out a huge laugh. The guy looks over at me as I’m recovering and I ask “Robocop?, to which HE starts cracking up. “Yeah, yeah…” Of course, as we’re having our chuckle, the gal is looking at us and not quite getting it. Right at that moment, the truck finished negotiating the turn and I noted to the guy that he might want to let the lady in on the reference before she thinks something crazy is going on. Of course, I had that Basil Poledouris theme playing in my head as I strolled off…
Oh yeah… nice poster, huh? I’m betting we’ll see a few more before this one’s ready for its close up.
OK, I’m (almost) sold. Granted, you can’t beat the original for what it brought to audiences back in the day (an unexpected hit, plenty of quotable lines, practical effects work galore and a story that solid, mixing drama, humor and extreme violence very well indeed), but this remake isn’t looking bad at all from this trailer. I have to say that this NOT being rated R is a bit annoying (the original film’s first cut kicked the censors in the groin and got an X rating until a few choice cuts were made. It took eleven attempts in total to get that R rating!), but I’m betting the studio thinks a PG-13 film will put more asses into seats because the tweens can walk up and buy tickets. Bleh.
Anyway, on one hand I can’t see this tanking unless there’s a big snowstorm in February that keeps people away and the film gets really awful reviews from some older cranky critics who do nothing but revere certain films and have a ZERO tolerance for anyone (no matter how skilled) touching what they grew up watching too many times. Then again… that February 7, 2014 release date scares me a bit. That and the assorted set woes I’ve occasionally read about. Well, as long as it’s better than Total Recall and Dredd and Hollywood doesn’t decide to copy Robocop 2 to even more of a T if this film does well, maybe it’ll be fine. Let’s see now… February, la, la, la… that means the Blu-Ray/DVD is out around May… Hmmmm, I think it’ll make a nice birthday present for me next year…
Ouch. Well, this looks pretty intriguing, that’s for sure. If you’ve NEVER seen the original film… YES, you should do so soon (as in if anyone asks “Whatcha doin’ this weekend?”, you’ll say “Watching OLDBOY!” and mean it!). I’ll admit to still wondering why Spike felt the urging need to remake a film that really didn’t need it, but hey, this remake thing worked for Scorcese with his multiple award winning The Departed, so perhaps Mr. Lee is onto something. Granted, Oldboy has got some meaner twists and turns than Internal Affairs did and the resetting of the story to a more Americanized setting may ruffle a few feathers… but again, it worked very well for Scorcese. I’m gathering Samuel L. Jackson doesn’t mind playing a total creep (and getting killed for that) again, as his intensity sure makes anything he’s been in lately pretty interesting. Well, except for that iPhone commercial… that made me hate gazpacho and measuring cups. And Siri (it’s a good thing I don’t own an iPhone)…
"DESTROY ALL FANBOYS!" 