Hey, he’s not real, he just wants your virtual stuff (especially if it’s sort of glowing as if it’s telling him where it’s at) and if you pop up and try and stop him, the worst thing that can happen is you’ll end waking up with a fake knot on your noggin upside down in a broom closet (blame the physics getting a bit wonky when he dropped your unconscious body into that quick storage solution). Ladies, you’ll probably get a fake rose and a fake peck on the cheek for waking up as he’s poking around for that fist-sized emerald you didn’t know you had, so feel free to file a fake discrimination complaint against him with that fake police report. Or something like that…