(video swiped from YouTuber Rinoa Leonhart)

So, the Xbox One. Yeah, THAT Xbox One. Did you know it has the computational POWER of ten Xbox 360’s? No? Well, Microsoft says so and while it’s probably true as the sky is blue (under certain circumstances) and the sun always rises even if you can’t see it (always, so far). Amusingly enough… I was planning to post that clip above BEFORE this article appeared (you WILL laugh at some point while reading it, trust me), but I got busy tinkering on a review and man, I feel as if they’re writing my lame comedy material for me and I don’t even OWN a Kinect.

At this point in damage control mode, you have to wonder when they’ll just start sending out white or black vans rolling around neighborhoods to grab random strangers off the street and MAKE them play a game just to show off how much POWER their system has. POWER, I tells ya… Granted, you still can’t use it offline unless you’re online first (subject to change based on day of the week and a update to the licensing agreement) and that new Kinect is always on even if you shut it “off”, but POWER! Wondrous working POWER… *Crack*, BOOOOOM!!!

OK, OK… I’ll knock it off now… Jeez…