Package Lander II: The (Not) Quickening

(Thanks, tarash oniani!)

So, in the middle of this more very urgent chaos taking place, I have 19 pounds of someone else’s medical supplies here. They’ve been here over a week and it’s FedEx’s fault for “just doing their job”. Hi, FedEx. Anyway, here’s the deal: someone ordered whatever is in this box and had it shipped here, but they seem to have mixed up their address with mine or the person who took the order scrambled the numbers or couldn’t read someone’s handwriting properly. I say this because just over two weeks back, I got two large boxes bundled together that for the same person.

After about 45 minutes to an hour spent going to the FedEx website which constantly sent me to an automated call line no matter what I tried, I held on for a live operator and explained the situation. The problem seemed to be solved when he said the box would be retrieved (which took a few days), but guess what?  It wasn’t.  A week or so later, another large box labeled medical supplies arrived and was left at the door before I even had the chance to open that door and explain to the driver this wasn’t the correct address. FedEk was called again, and almost 52 minutes of looping muzak later, someone said they would be picking up the box… and that was what, almost a week ago?

cast_away

The “someone didn’t get their stuff” international distress signal.

This wouldn’t even happen with the post office, I bet, as all those decades of mailing stuff here has never resulted in an incorrect address save for one time someone had to move thanks to a fire the day I mailed a box out and there was suddenly no place for the package I sent to end up at. Fortunately, the FedEx box I received isn’t stamped perishable, but I’m betting a penny (what’s with all the betting here lately?) someone is missing their supplies for whatever they need them for and I can’t do a darn thing but wait for this box to be picked up and re-delivered to whatever the correct address is.

So far, all I’ve gotten from FedEx after I Tweeted for help this time has been two separate surveys, one by phone and the other one via a Twitter direct message, which made me think the company wants to fire or otherwise discipline someone who doesn’t deserve firing over this nonsense. Doing one’s job in this case means getting it right the first time and this sure isn’t right at all. Hmmm…. maybe this guy needs to be in charge of things – where’s my time machine at?

(Thanks. ThreeOranges!)

Eh, I really shouldn’t be going on about this with Watchmen-like allout helter happening as we speak. But I do kind of want my living room space back and more importantly, some person to FINALLY get their stuff because if they have to re-order, guess where the box will end up for the third time (which is NOT the charm, people). Where’s my exit music at?

Oh, right. Here you go:

(Thanks, Real Vintage!)

-GW

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