Yeah, a recent and rather silly class action lawsuit which cost the folks behind one of my favorite (and occasional) guilty pleasures about $2.5 million bucks isn’t the best news to scribble about. However, considering that we live in a world where every product advertised in any form of media relies on a bit of Pinocchio-style truth stretching, it’s odd that Nutella became the latest poster child for “misleading” ads. Granted, it’s got palm oil, vanillin and other stuff that (if consumed in large enough quantities) will probably give your tummy a royal deluxe ass-kicking. So (duh), if you consume it in quantities outside the amount recommended on the label (as in sitting on your oh so fat ass in front of the TV eating an entire jar), it’s probably not the best thing for you. But yes, it’s far from the worst thing you can do to yourself these days. No, wait… this is worse (much, much worse).

That said, I’d bet real money that a tablespoon between two slices of freshly baked wheat bread, a few matzoh, or some other product that wasn’t the fluffy baked chemical crap that passes for “bread” in American stores wouldn’t be all that terrible if a kid were walking to school afterward or at least exercised regularly. Oddly enough, this lawsuit was started and ended fairly quickly, unlike the bigger and more important tobacco lawsuits that dragged out for years while countless smoking addicts were dying away worldwide. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve heard of any Nutella-related deaths or injuries other than the one time a few years back I dropped a jar and stuck my foot out to stop it from hitting the kitchen floor. The jar didn’t break and I’m fine by the way, thank you for asking. Then again, I actually don’t buy Nutella regularly (I’m still on one jar this year) and I’m smart enough to know that binging on anything isn’t a good thing no matter how tasty it is.

Of course, trying to get someone hooked on something (whether it be a food product, tobacco, medicine or not so legal narcotic to cut down because it might be harmful to their health) to quit or slow down isn’t the easiest thing to do. Particularly in this age of people not understanding that addiction often trumps personal responsibility when your drug of choice (or guilty pleasure, in the case of legal products) does what it does all too well. “I can stop any time I want to” turns to “Leave me alone! It’s MY choice!” mostly because of denial and pure pleasure colliding upstairs and both winning out over common sense.
Hell, all things being equal, I’d rater eat a jar of Nutella over the course of a few months than have a sip of 5-Hour Energy (er, what’s up with the creepy cowboy in those TV spots?) or Mio Energy (which has some of the ugliest, least appealing animated ads I’ve ever seen) any day of the week…